Never waste a drop of toothpaste ever again
Toothpaste always runs out just when you’re in the biggest rush. You hold the end of the tube with one hand, and squeeze it between the thumb and forefinger of the other, pulling and squishing until the last drops of minty paste are up near the nozzle. You then attempt a kind of gripping/twisting/squeezing motion which — hopefully — extracts the last remnants of toothpaste from the shoulders of the tube, but also rips through these shoulders leaving any remnants open to the air, to become dried out within hours.
And the liberated drop immediately drips onto your interview tie. Damn your idiot spouse for not always squeezing from the bottom!
What you need, my panicked, angry, job-seeking friend, is the Catherine Werdel’s Toothpaste-Squeezing Toothbrush, which will allow you to gently roll the toothpaste tube “auf den letzten Drücke” (she’s German). It’s an incredibly simple design: just a slot in the toothbrush’s handle which lets you roll the tube and push its contents towards the exit hole.
My esteemed blogging colleague Andrew Liszewski, over at Oh Gizmo, speculates like a true paranoiac. The reason this design has never been commercially available is that the evil toothbrush cartels also sell the paste, and they want you to waste as much as you can. Maybe Liszewski should consider one less espresso in the mornings, as I have a far simpler explanation: Imagine trying to use this brush when the tube is already wrapped halfway around it. It would be a nightmare. And given that we’re all too lazy to even squeeze a tube from the bottom, there’s no way we would thread this thing on every single time.
Squeezing toothbrush product page [Catherine Werdel via Oh Gizmo]
See Also:
- $400 Philips Toothbrush Comes with Plug-In Drinking Glass
- Toothbrush Wobbles But it Won't Fall Down
- Water Fountain Toothbrush No Longer Costs $1750
- Unibody Aluminum Toothbrush Case is Tough, Pointless
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