How To Curb Habits That Keep You Financially Poor

How do you stop habits that keep you financially poor?: originally appeared on Quora: The best answer to any question. Ask a question, get a great answer. Learn from experts and access insider knowledge. You can follow Quora on Twitter, Facebook, and Google+.

2015-02-25-FaisalKhan

Answer by Faisal Khan, Banking & Payments Consultant

[Here are] a couple of things that will help you. I was in the same boat a couple of years ago and the following helped me get out of the hole.

  • Savings: Most people get an income, then minus their expenses and whatever is left, is considered savings. This is wrong. When you get an income, minus what you want to save and then whatever is left is what you have for your expenses, now learn to live within that.
  • It takes time to get out of the hole.
  • Track your expenses. Believe me you will be surprised where your money is going. Track everything, from the smallest expense to the largest. Do this for a month or two and group them up into categories.
  • From your expense tracking, see if you can unilaterally cut down 1/3rd on expenses, and perhaps 10% on utilities. Don’t say it cannot be done. Its doable. Have you tried it?
  • Small expenses add up. Be very cognizant of that.
  • All your life you have been writing with one hand (either the left or the right), for financial discipline, think of it as changing the hand with which you usually write with, to the other one. It takes time for the switch and to be proficient. But you must not give up.
  • Seek advise of a financial advisor who specializes in the deflation of debt and help people get out it. Even if you have no debt, it is your financial behavior that is causing you to be poor. You can certainly improve upon it.
  • Aim to increase your income and decrease your expenses. Easier said that done, but if you can reduce your expenses by say 30%, try to see if you can increase your income by 10%.
  • Pay off the highest interest items first (like credit cards, etc.)
  • Cut and throw away your credit card. Learn to live within your means, and not on borrowed money (try it for a while anyways).
  • Your debit card is all what you need.
  • Eat at home. It saves a lot of money, same with boozing. Drinks at bars and clubs are extremely expensive.
  • There is no shame in going generic. In all manners. The goal is to save. No one can tell if you’re wearing a100 cologne/perfume or off the shelf Brut! No one will ponder how come you are wearing25 jeans. No one. No one will care if you don’t show up at a club or a party or at the cinema. You are doing this for yourself.
  • The money you save, will make you happy. It can come in handy sometime (for an emergency, or a vacation, or buying something needy).
  • When tempted to spend. Just drop the thought. Impulse is the biggest killer of savings.
  • Only you can discipline yourself. If you’re a family man, explain it to them. They will understand. Sometimes you might give in to pity, that’s okay too, we are all humans, but think of it as a bad habit. If you improve yourself, you and the family become the eventual winners.

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An Open Letter to My Mom and Black Women

Dear Mom,

From the Jerame Reid killing stretching back to the Michael Brown killing, multiracial, intergenerational communities have proudly proclaimed that Black lives matter. But within our contemporary context “Black lives matter” seems to be associated only with Black men, young and old. I want to tell you, Mom, that when I chant those three words, when I march, lie in the streets, or raise my hands symmetrically in the air, I do so to assert your humanity too. You are worthy.

Our Black foremothers in America always had to fight for humanity. In the early stages of the slave trade, Black women were economically less valuable than Black men. When Black women were seized from their homelands and forced aboard slave ships, they were branded with hot irons. When they resisted or expressed their agony through a scream or cry, they were deprived of clothing, and all parts of their bodies were beaten. When Black women were slaves, they were seen as reproducers of property, not of children, with no legal claims over the children they birthed.

When Black women fought for the rights of the children they bore, they still had to become the maid or the midwife to the white family, for pay and survival. Not only could they not take care of their own children, but they had to take care of other people’s children.

Even when Great-Grandma wasn’t given the right to vote, she helped Black men strategize. She told them how they should vote. She and her sisters filled political meetings. Black women coordinated slave revolts. They sued for freedom. They prayed.

Through the Black freedom struggle Grandma was there fighting for collective Black humanity. She demonstrated support. She organized. She led teach-ins. She facilitated literacy and citizenship workshops. She taught us to think beyond conventional models of leadership.

You refused to be moved from sitting in segregated public spaces. You withstood threats against your Black dignity and the currents of volatile white racism. You took a stand against white supremacy with calm and determination to change the moral compass of America. If our community forgot to thank you for your sacrifice, I didn’t. Thank you. You are worthy. You are loved.

You shared some sacred lessons with me. You told me to drink not from the well of hatred, immorality and dishonesty but from the fountain of love, justice and truth, and it nourishes my soul. You told me to seek opportunities just like my grandparents, who joined over 6 million other Black families in the Great Migration and relocated for better opportunities.

You taught me the ritual of saving our financial earnings. Even in 2015, when Black women make 64 cents to every dollar white men make, they still find a way to support their families. You were able to make meals with the few dollars you had. Not once were the lights, cable or water absent from daily use. And you wouldn’t let your financial worries wither a dream. You sought to help your child achieve his dream of graduating from college.

Mom, you taught me how to vote by taking me with you into the voting booth during every presidential election since I was 4, until I was able to participate in democracy myself by becoming a registered voter. You were among the 96 percent of Black women who helped elect our first Black president in 2008, and four years later you remained in this vast group, reelecting President Barack Obama. In fact, in every presidential election since 1984, Black women have voted in greater numbers than Black men, and in the last two elections the voter turnout rate was higher among Black women than among women or men of any racial group.

After all your sacrifices you still suffer the sting of racism and sexism. It seems that the only way you’re rendered visible is through the loss of a Black male, like when your sister lost her husband and had to take on the role of grieving widow, or when your aunt lost her son and had to take on the role of grieving mother. For months we witnessed them endure their misery.

We were left broken each time news came that another Black person had died at the hands of non-Black police officers. We were left damaged when we learned that two separate grand juries had decided not to indict the officers involved in such killings, yet again affirming that our Blackness is a crime. But there seems to be some hope, as we learned that the officer who killed a 28-year-old unarmed Black man who’d entered a dark stairwell was indicted on six counts.

So here we stand, amid turmoil and thoughts of our contemporary moment. Our nation may honor our race and your gender from time to time, but never both simultaneously, outwardly rejecting your dual identity, denying the real forces of racism and sexism and dismissing your heritage. Black women embody the struggle for recognition in America.

So I’m fighting for you, Grandma, my sisters and our ancestors. If the nation is unable to validate your existence, may this offering animate you. You and Black women everywhere matter. God need send no person to the burning bush to affirm your being, because you are made in the image and likeness of God. Just like when you told me that God is love and urged me to discover the God within, Mom, you are loved. You are worthy.

With insurmountable love,
Your son

Betsey Johnson Can't Live Without These Hysterical 5 Items

Betsey Johnson knows exactly what five things she’d need if ever stranded on an island.

“A great guy would be nice,” she told HuffPost Live on Tuesday. “Daniel Craig. Or Matt Lauer. I love Matt.”

But that’s not all the legendary fashion designer would want with her.

“Well, this is very stupid silly fashion-y, but I would have to have my red lipstick,” she confessed. “I would need my champagne — lipsticks, diamonds, champagne and rock ‘n roll.”

The energetic 72-year-old, whose eponymous fashion line is celebrating its 50th birthday this year, has made a point of maintaining her sense of whimsy even as she’s gotten older.

“I think me [and] Madonna, we gotta stand up for getting older and not getting old,” she explained, citing Tina Turner as her inspiration.

“I push it all the time because people probably think I look ridiculous and I don’t dress my age, but I feel responsible for setting up a new standard of old, young,” she continued. “It’s up to you. Your spirit, your heart, your makeup, whatever.”

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Watch more from Betsey Johnson’s conversation with HuffPost Live here.

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Media Matters' Joe Strupp: Bill O'Reilly Could Hurt Fox News As Much As Jayson Blair Hurt The New York Times

Bill O’Reilly has already been compared to Brian Williams amid the controversy of alleged falsehoods in O’Reilly’s reporting, but Media Matters’ Joe Strupp went a step further on Wednesday, comparing O’Reilly to disgraced New York Times writer Jayson Blair during a HuffPost Live interview.

Strupp added to the firestorm surrounding O’Reilly on Tuesday, when he and two other writers published their own report claiming O’Reilly lied about overhearing the fatal gunshot in the 1977 suicide of George de Mohrenschildt, who was involved in the investigation of JFK’s assassination. In his HuffPost Live interview, Strupp drew parallels between O’Reilly and embattled reporters like Williams, “60 Minutes” correspondent Lara Logan and Blair.

When host Caroline Modarressy-Tehrani called the Blair reference a “stark, harsh comparison,” Strupp argued “the level of reaction is what is important.”

“O’Reilly is the top face of Fox News, and even the other night he was bragging about how his latest ratings are higher than anyone else in his time slot. So for him to have a question of whether he’s accurate hurts the brand as much as Jayson Blair hurt The New York Times,” Strupp said. “Did he do things to the level of Jayson Blair and to the amount of Jayson Blair? Perhaps not — that we know of. But he’s also a bigger name, a bigger face of the franchise than Blair was at The New York Times.”

Interviews with two former colleagues who worked with O’Reilly in 1977 characterized him as more concerned with his own profile than the grind of reporting the news, according to Strupp.

“They knew him to be someone who would, in their own words, not only take stories that were broken elsewhere and claim them as his own, but didn’t seem to want to work with others in terms of finding news. He wanted to get press for himself, promote himself,” Strupp said.

Strupp said neither O’Reilly nor Fox has responded to Media Matters’ attempts to contact them. Mother Jones’ David Corn, who co-wrote the original report alleging O’Reilly’s fabrications about the Falklands War, also told HuffPost Live on Wednesday that O’Reilly “still has yet to refute a single fact” in Corn’s story.

Watch the full HuffPost Live conversation with Media Matters’ Joe Strupp above.

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Coding: The Next Superpower

I have told and retold stories describing my hackathon experience so many times to friends and family members that I have perfected every detail — so much so that it sounds like I am giving a soliloquy from Hamlet rather than casually telling a story. I now know exactly when to pause for dramatic effect (right before I tell my listener about the results being announced) and I know when to pause for subtle chuckles (right after I say how our team won the Hackathon Dance Battle.) However, if I had to sum up my hackathon experience without delivering a monologue-type speech, I would probably accurately capture it in these two sentences.

  1. It smells way too much like Axe cologne.
  2. You feel like Mark Zuckerberg, Steve Jobs, (insert ambitious, excited, slightly crazy entrepreneur here) for a solid 36 hours.

.

These two thoughts might seem extremely bizarre and unrelated but bear with me.

Part 1: It smells way too much like Axe cologne.

Computer science is notoriously labeled as being a male-dominated field. In fact, according to the National Center for Women and Information Technology, women hold only 18 percent of all undergraduate computer and information science degrees. It’s a pretty disheartening statistic, but as one of the five girls in my AP Computer Science class of 45, I can unfortunately corroborate the fact that female representation in computer science is depressingly lacking.

I was therefore unsurprised (not to mention irritated) at the wave of Axe cologne that greeted me when I first entered the hackathon. After looking around for a couple minutes, I sadly confirmed my suspicions: I was a minority there by a long shot. I remember being so surprised that, for once, the line for the men’s bathroom was much longer than the line for the women’s. Only after checking the guest list did I realize how bad it was. There were twenty girls at the hackathon. Out of more than three hundred participants.

It doesn’t have to be this way, and with the up and coming organizations that aim to close the gender gap in computer science, such as GirlsWhoCode, it probably won’t in the future. But it should not be just up to these organizations to encourage girls to try out coding — a lot of responsibility lies with the girls themselves.

So if you are a girl reading this, I am talking to you. Once you read the second part of this article, you are going to realize what incredible events, experiences, and memories you are missing out on. You are going to realize that after learning even basic forms of coding, you can begin to build, design and create anything you want. This probably sounds extremely exaggerated, and you might not believe me right now. But coding is literally the closest thing you can get to a superpower in our mere mortal world.

And here’s why:

Part 2: You feel like Mark Zuckerberg, Steve Jobs, (insert ambitious, excited, slightly crazy entrepreneur here) for a solid 36 hours.

There is something enticing about the hacker type of lifestyle. It’s alluring. It wasn’t so much the idea that you could come across a billion dollar idea at 2:00 a.m. (although that is a pretty big incentive). No, it was more the idea that in 24 hours you could make something, build something, design something that could change the world. Of course, this is not always true — my first hackathon app was an Android app that wakes sleepy train-goers up before reaching their stop. It didn’t exactly solve the American obesity problem or help early diagnoses of cancer. But, I still remember, at the end of the night, when the app was finished, my team and I stared at our little Android phone for a solid five minutes, just in awe. We had just made that, from scratch, in less than 15 hours, and it works.

It’s a magical feeling that is hard to describe. You feel a sense of pride and confidence combined with an insatiable hunger to make it better. You feel a marvelous sense of accomplishment in your own skills and knowledge. And of course, you feel a very tight, emotional bond with your teammates, because, honestly, it has been a good 22 hours and you haven’t gotten sick of them yet. Coding combines the left and right sides of brain because it harnesses your visual/art skills and couples it with your logic/thinking skills. At the end of the hackathon, you don’t feel as though you just did a giant research paper, but more like an artist finishing a masterpiece. There is no feeling like it.

At the end of my usual impassioned hackathon speeches, I usually get the same response: “That sounds so cool! I wish I knew how to code like you!”

That’s usually where the conversation ends, and the person I’m talking to brings up a new topic. And I think, that’swhere the problem lies. I always hear, “I wish I knew…” rather than “I want to learn NOW.” You can wish all you want, but in the end it is up to you to sit down and type in “learn how to code” in Google search. Learn how to design a basic website. Create an app on your phone. Make a video game. After all, the next hackathon is only a couple months away.

I hope to see you there.

Teenage Girl Leaves For ISIS, And Others Follow

LONDON — Aqsa Mahmood’s family saw her as an intelligent and popular teenager who helped care for her three younger siblings and her grandparents at her home in Scotland. She listened to Coldplay, read Harry Potter novels and drank Irn Bru, a Scottish soft drink.

Two-Thirds of Today's Retirees Say They're Living in the Best Home of Their Lives: New Study Shatters Stereotypes

Part 1 of a Two-Part Series

As 10,000 boomers turn 65 every day, the entire landscape of retirement is changing. Perhaps nowhere are these changes more prevalent than in how people relate to their homes — and how this will transform the entire housing market in the years ahead.

For example, while many of us assume household growth is likely to be driven by the young millennial generation, you might be surprised to learn that, according to Harvard’s Joint Center for Housing Studies, over the next decade, people age 65+ will account for almost all household growth. (See the chart below.)

Projected household growth by age, 2015-2025
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This tremendous growth among older households is driven by two forces:

  • First, the massive baby boom generation moving into their retirement years
  • Second, increased longevity, which means more people will live longer in retirement

As part of a multiyear examination of the transformation of all aspects of retirement, Age Wave, in partnership with Merrill Lynch, just completed a comprehensive study, titled Home in Retirement: More Freedom, New Choices, in which we surveyed a representative sample of over 3,600 adults nationwide, from all walks of life and socioeconomic strata, to uncover their priorities, dreams, and worries as they determine which homes, communities, and regions they will live in during their retirement years. As Andy Sieg, head of Global Wealth and Retirement Solutions for Bank of America Merrill Lynch, points out, “How and where our nation’s aging population chooses to live will have widespread implications on the way homes are designed and renovated, the resources people will need, and how businesses nationwide need to prepare.”

This is the first of two articles that describe our findings. If you like, you can download the entire study report here.

Crossing the “Freedom Threshold”

In terms of where and how you live, there are now two distinct phases of retirement. During the first phase — which can often span more than 15 or 20 years — retirees often feel healthier and more active than prior generations of retirees felt. In fact, this first phase of retirement has emerged as a time of more freedom and new choices for how and where you might live.

Keep in mind that throughout much of our lives, where we live is often determined by work and family responsibilities. Most careers require that people live within a reasonable commuting distance from where they and/or their spouse work. And, of course, during our parenting years, we need homes that are close to our children’s schools. However, as we enter our 60s, we begin to cross what our study calls the “Freedom Threshold.” As people enter the life stages of empty nesting and/or retirement, they feel liberated from many of the responsibilities and obligations that have restricted their choice of home and community up until this point.

This study determined that the freedom to live where and how you like actually peaks in this first phase of retirement, with two out of three retirees saying they are living in “the best homes of their lives.” As one focus group participant explained, “In retirement, we suddenly have the chance to live anywhere we want. There hasn’t been any other time in our lives when we had that kind of freedom, and it’s exhilarating.”

The “Freedom Threshold”
2015-02-23-CrossingtheFreedomThreshold.jpg

Home ownership remains a big part of the American Dream for many people of all ages, and four out of five Americans age 65+ actually achieve that dream and own their own home. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, seven in ten homeowners age 65+ have fully paid off their mortgages (see chart below). Think about that. As one retired focus group participant expressed, “When I was younger, I always had to worry about that monthly mortgage payment. Now I own my home free and clear. It’s replaced my anxiety with a greater sense of peace of mind.” It also means that these retirees have built real equity in their homes, which often can represent a substantial part of their overall net worth. Households age 65+ now account for 40 percent of all home equity in the United States.

Percent of homeowners with no mortgage by age
2015-02-23-PercentHomeOwnerswithnoMortgage.jpg

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

The stereotype many of us hold in our minds is that most retirees want to stay put in their homes or move to an age-restricted retirement community. The reality is often quite different: We learned that 37 percent of today’s retirees have moved at least once since retiring, and another 27% expect to move at some point. A mere 7 percent live in retirement communities. As we might expect, some retirees move because they want to reduce home expenses or because they’re experiencing health challenges, divorce, widowhood, or an empty nest. However, more and more retirees are moving to improve their lifestyle, enjoy the stimulation of cities or college towns, experience more comfortable weather, or relocate to an area that just feels like it would be more fun than where they’ve been living. What may surprise you to know is that the top reason retirees choose to move is “wanting to be closer to family” — which suggests an engaging and active new chapter of life, rather than a retreat or slowing down.

Reasons for moving to current home in retirement
2015-02-23-Reasonsformovingtocurrenthome.jpg

The Downsize Surprise

About 50 percent of retirees who move choose to downsize, and they do so to trim costs, decrease maintenance responsibilities, or simplify their lives. However, there is also what we are calling a “Downsize Surprise.” While 20 percent of retirees relocate to similar-sized homes, incredibly another 30 percent actually upsize, moving into larger homes in retirement. The primary reason that half of retirees who move don’t downsize is to have the space for family to visit on a regular basis. It’s as though they’re turning their empty nest into a “Nurturing Nest.” With so many families spread out around the country, many of today’s retirees want their homes to become a place where the family (especially grandchildren) can regularly visit and reconnect. In our focus groups, we repeatedly heard comments like, “We want our children and grandchildren to feel like this is their second home.”

Home Is Where the Heart Is … But Let’s Remodel the Kitchen!

This study also identified the primary reason that some retirees choose not to move at all: They simply love their home, a sentiment we heard repeatedly. Many focus group participants expressed some variation of, “Our home means everything to us. It’s where we raised our family, and all our memories are embedded in these walls.”

Retirees may love their home, but that doesn’t mean they don’t see room for improving it, and that’s where another long-held stereotype is dissolving. While you might imagine that younger households are ripe for remodeling projects and older adults prefer to keep things status quo, it turns out that age 55+ households now account for almost half (45 percent) of all spending on home renovations — about $90 billion last year alone. And these numbers will most likely escalate as the boomers propensity for shape-shifting impacts the world of retiree home remodeling.

While stereotypical images of retirees’ home renovations may conjure up images of grab bars, ramps, and other changes to accommodate health challenges, what we discovered was very different. Retirees who plan to stay in their home throughout retirement are far more likely to have made changes that create more attractive, comfortable, and versatile homes. As you see in the chart below, they report feeling the freedom to create their dream home.

Percent of retirees who have renovated their home by…
2015-02-23-Percentwhohaverenovatedtheirhomeby.jpg

Today’s Retirees Are Seeking Intergenerational Community Connections

Many of us may hold the image of retirees living in gated communities with little or no interaction with the larger community outside their door. This study shatters that stereotype as well, demonstrating that today’s retirees have both the time and desire to reinvigorate their connections with their communities. They are rediscovering their neighbors and neighborhoods; engaging in work, volunteer, and cultural activities; visiting museums and libraries; and taking lifelong learning classes at community colleges.

The Best Home of Your Life

In this first phase of retirement, retirees feel a greater sense of freedom to move, if it makes sense, or renovate to make their homes more comfortable and enjoyable. As a result, almost two-thirds (65 percent) of retirees now say they are living in “the best home of their life.”
Stay tuned for part 2 of this series tomorrow, when I’ll be focusing on the second phase of retirement and how retiree housing choices change as retirees grow older and health and independence become an increasing priority. We’ll also look at the growing role technologic innovation can play to allow retirees to live where and how they want in this phase or retirement.

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

What Should I Write About? 25 Quick Content Ideas for Social Media & Email Marketing

It is the most common question I get when speaking about email marketing, social media or small business in general… “What should I write about?”

In this world of short attention spans, mobile devices and text messages, engagement is the new word of mouth: that public yet meaningful back and forth you get with clients and customers by sending out a great email to your list or posting something insightful or shareable on social media.

So, what should you write about? The short answer is two-fold. You write about what you know that they don’t know. That just means you share your knowledge and experience for free. And, you write about what you have access to that they don’t have access to; and you have more access than you might think — early access to a special event or offer, backstage passes, autographed copies, white papers, an extra hour of your time. Give what you have to give and don’t charge for it. Charge for your services, yes. But on social and in emails you want to give it away for free, setting yourself up as the go-to in your industry. Share it and they will call. Or email. Or text when they are ready to have you do it for them.

Here are 25 quick content ideas you can use to build on your reputation as an expert or hub of information and access. Try one or two of them this week. Save the list for later so you can avoid that drawing-a-blank moment when it’s time to send out an email blast or post something interesting on social media. You’re not alone. Most people stop and stare at the screen when faced with a blank page or a social post to fill in. Even if you do nothing on this list, I hope it will spark your own ideas. This is just a start.

1. Q & A
Chances are that you have been getting calls or emails lately that ask the same question. Changes in weather, special holidays or events and other out-of-your-control factors will bring up a lot of the same questions for your customers. Think about the most common questions you get on a regular basis, just this week or even just this morning and write about it. Provide the answer. Anticipate the need and push out the information. Easy to do.

2. Ask for Feedback
Create a simple survey: 1, 2 or 3 questions and push it out. You’ll get a lot of great information, and this one should really count as two ideas because you can also push out the results of your survey along with your plans to address requests, needs or questions.

3. Talk About A Great Partner
Share the spotlight with one of your best strategic partners. Give them a shameless plug. Talk ’em up. It costs you nothing to tell the world how great they have been for your organization and chances are pretty good that they might return the favor one day – but don’t do it with that in mind. Say what is true, focus on the positive and be real.

4. Before & After Anything
Everyone loves to witness transformation. We are inspired by visible change. No matter what your business model, think about a way to visually show a before and after transformation. This is not just about helping a client lose weight or organizing a messy closet – although you cannot miss with either of those. But maybe it’s a graph showing the difference in your financial client’s Debt-To-income ratio. Maybe it’s a new menu design, fresh flowers in the lobby or seeing the difference in a neighborhood with satellite photos. Get creative and make it visual.

5. Write a Review
Talk about a great book you read or a class you attended. Share in your own words what made it so good, where you got the most impact. How you changed your own way of doing things as a result of the experience. This is a chance to really connect with your readers and to offer some free press to the writer or instructor that did something worth writing about.

6. Share Milestones
You can keep this very simple or get fancy with a nice infographic, but take a moment to reflect on some of the big milestones in your organization and share it. First employee hired, first hundred or million in sales, first office expansion, first coffee maker in the kitchen – celebrate the big stuff and the little stuff alike. Have some fun with this. And it can be ongoing, you don’t have to share everything at once. Do one a week or every month and make it a series.

7. Quick, Timely Tips
Keep these very, very simple. And show me, don’t just tell me. Example – if you’re a swimming pool or landscape maintenance service and you know there is a big freeze coming, remind people to wrap their outdoor pipes and SHOW them how to do it with a photo or video. Nothing high end or expensive, just a quick how to that might help them from needing to call you with a broken pipe. Help them save now and they’ll call you when a bigger issue comes up.

8. Choose One Thing
You may be doing a lot of great work with enormous impact for your clients or your community, but your readers don’t have time to take it all in at once, not on social media or in an email. Decide on one single, bite-sized piece of impact and share that. Just one at a time. Save the rest for another day and you will be able to see which types of story get more response. Truth be told, I got this idea from a great partner group in Dallas, CSW Corp. Their “One Idea Newsletter” is a huge hit – and it’s always short.

9. Offer A Choice
Set up a poll or just post a question with two options for an answer. You will pull in responses and get some good feedback as well as engagement. You’ll be surprised by how many people will take the time to respond when there is just one seemingly simple question. Example: I prefer to have 1. Dessert or 2. An Appetizer when I go out to eat. If you ask it on social media you’ll get more open ended answers – all responses are good engagement.

10. Give Away the Farm
Tell them what you know and why it matters. Well, not everything you know but refer to #8 and choose one. But don’t hold back. Tell them exactly how to make that famous coconut cake in your café or what paint brand and colors you used in that room makeover. Nothing you write in an email or on social media will eliminate the need for you and what you do. Tell them how to do it. Some will try. Most will call you. Or start, get to step 3 in your instructions and then call you. Set yourself up as the go-to in your field and they will call.

11. Showcase Your Team
With permission, share photos of your staff in the office, doing good deeds or working the tradeshow floor. Thank them, in public, for being who they are. Explain what they do for the company. Announce a change, an accomplishment or a birthday. You can do this all together as long as you don’t leave anyone out. Or, you can go one-by-one and get a lot more content out of the opportunity.

12. Pictures with Quotes Get Shared
This is just a fact. I cannot fully understand or explain this phenomenon but it is a fact. Photos with a famous or inspirational quote are some of the most shared content on the web. Especially if relevant to a holiday or big event. You may need to use an app like Pic Stitch or Word Swag on your phone to bring photo and text together into one image. It’s easy and it’s free. I know this seems really simple but if you put one out once a week among your other content, you’ll see what I mean. It will often get more shares and likes than other content. Pro tip: Make sure you add your Twitter handle or website address in text on the image as well so that as people share it, they are also sharing your information. You’re welcome.

13. Do A Simple Good Deed
This only works if you mean it. Don’t fake it – people will see through that. But wouldn’t it be nice to do a good deed? For a customer or for your own team – maybe even have a good deed of the week or month and just quietly share it. You don’t have to scream “look what I did!” but you can inspire others or challenge others to continue the good vibes. Example: Tell them you woke up in a generous mood and decided that any employees that came in early would get a surprise $5 Starbucks card just for being awesome. Share it and challenge other small businesses to do the same.

14. Highlight A Bad Review
You can link to all the good ones, don’t worry. But some of the best content can come from a bad review. It’s not your job to change it or try and reverse it. Embrace it and leverage it. Celebrate the menu item they hated. Proclaim that all feedback is a gift and tell your readers what you’re doing to make sure everyone has a great experience. The bad review and your acknowledgement of it will serve to validate all the great reviews you’re getting. And taking this tack with a good sense of humor without ignoring legitimate gripes will go a long way in diffusing the situation. I could write and entire article about this one idea.

15. Bust A Myth
Take a common misconception about your industry or profession and debunk it. Try to do it in a very short format. In fact, that applies to all of these ideas. Short and sweet.

16. Say It With Video
Whatever you want to say, add a video. Nothing high dollar is needed unless you are a video professional, and even then. Thanks to reality TV (the real and first culprit was MTV’s Real World) we are now willing as a society to watch poor quality video as long as we can understand what is being said and can generally see it on the screen. Unscripted is best. Or just make a PowerPoint and record your voice delivering it with software like Camtasia or Joomla. Videos get more play. Facebook will tell you how many people watched it. You can easily add video to an email blast too. Can’t hurt.

17. Play A Game
Post a trivia question, offer a reward for getting the answer right. This works with anyone. Take it as far as you like. Host a game of champions or shout out to participants. People like to play games. And they like to win.

18. Take A Moment To Really Be Yourself
Tell your audience who you really are, outside of the office. Do you play in a band? Have a killer vinyl collection? Speak more than one language? Share what makes you different/special/unique and just put it out there. You’ll be surprised by how many people will not just like but identify with you. Don’t over share. This is not the venue for your ugly divorce settlement or grandmother’s illness. Unless you are an attorney or a doctor. Then, maybe. OK, still no.

19. Remind Them Of Something They Already Know
Is there advice you give your clients and customers regularly but they forget or just ignore? Restate it once more. Especially if it’s something they know they should do – like their taxes or exercise or submitting a form on time. This is content. It feels like nagging but if you say it right it will nurture the relationship. Just like regular life.

20. Embrace Life Hacks
Not sure what I mean? A life hack is an extremely simple idea that makes something easier, more efficient or more fun. They usually involve items most people have around the house or office and by using it in a different way, you make some other activity easier or better.. Google “life hack” and you’ll find a lot of them. Once you get the concept, think of one for your own clients or share some you find when you do that Google search. Remember, it’s not your job to come up with all the content. Not all the time. Sometimes you can just serve as the hub of good content. That’s enough in most cases to keep the relationship going another day. Pro tip: add your product or industry to the Google search. So if you sell office supplies and have a surplus of rubber bands on hand, Google “rubber band life hacks” and then send out a link to the top 10 rubber-band life hacks you find with a discount to buy your rubber bands. Now you’re marketing.

21. Link to an Event you Will Attend
This can be an official work event like a conference or seminar but it can also be a great music concert or festival that lines up well with #18, pulling back the kimono and showing them who you really are. Encourage others to attend. Make sure the event host is able to see that you shared it if you can. (Example – on Twitter include the event hashtag or @handle with your tweet.) This is a public invitation to engage. Try it.

22. Carry The Flag for A Local Nonprofit
Choose an organization you care about, make a donation or sign up to volunteer and then share that out there with an invite for others to do the same. This is similar to the “Do a good deed” idea but this one is a little more official and involves an actual organization that you want to help. Have a canned food drive or celebrate back-to-school with a school supply drive. Send people to the org’s events or send your own team and post pictures. The more you carry the flag for others, the better you look (and feel). Again, this one only works if it’s genuine. Be real.

23. Share Your Music Playlist
Cliché? Maybe. Honestly, this one is just for fun but it ends up getting a lot of play in the work world too. If you use Spotify or Pandora or whatever, create a playlist of your favorite music to do taxes to, or to walk a dog or train for a 5k (that’s me right now) or for whatever you do for a living, make the list and then share access to it on social media and in an email. Music brings people together. You probably already have a playlist – send that one out. Nobody is going to judge you for secretly loving Olivia Newton John. They might point it out, but that’s the essence of true engagement. You’ll find out ONJ is on other people’s lists too. Have you never been mellow?

24. Ask For Recommendations
Taking a client out for dinner, need new flooring in your kitchen or looking for a resource for printer ink? Ask your friends and followers for their recommendations. Ask your clients. Maybe one of them is a great resource for you, right under your nose. Maybe two. Do you remember to ask what your clients do and what your customers have to offer? This is a fun way to give them a soap box and to build real relationships without having to write a lot of content.

25. Make A List With Helpful Advice or Ideas
Like this one. When ideas are in a list, people can absorb it faster and are more likely to read all the way to the end. Number it if it’s more than 7 items. Bullet lists are great too. If it’s long like this one, put the whole list on your website or in a blog and then just post one item from the list every few hours online. Or share a short blurb in an email and link to the rest. Lists are easy and get shared. Share this one on Facebook or Twitter and watch how many others share it.

Overall, my best advice for what to write is simple. Share your knowledge and be who you really are. Write in first person as much as possible. Avoid industry terms unless the only people reading your stuff are industry-related. Keep it short. Make it practical, actionable and easy to read on a cell phone. If you keep at it, your clients and followers will see you as a resource. That can only be good for business. #YouCanDoThis

The Problem With 'Manorexia' And Why We Need A Gender-Neutral Approach To Eating Disorders

While terms like “manorexia” have been tossed around to alert the public that eating disorders are not exclusive to women, such labels can be damaging.

In a HuffPost Live conversation on Tuesday, adult psychiatrist Dr. Ted Weltzin underscored the need to move away from these misleading, gender-specific ways of discussing eating disorders.

“It really does not help people to really understand what is going on,” he told host Caroline Modarressay-Tehrani. “We really need to get to a gender-neutral approach to eating disorders.”

Sam Thomas, who drew from his own struggle with bulimia to found the organization Men Get Eating Disorders Too, said eating disorders cross more than just gender lines.

“The message ought to be that eating disorders have no gender. … Anybody and everybody can be a sufferer of eating disorders,” Thomas said. “Ultimately this is an issue that can affect anybody, [irrespective of] gender, age, sexual orientation, ethnicity, religion and even their social background. So I think it’s really important that we actually try to be more inclusive when we talk about eating disorders, so that nobody feels excluded.”

In the United States, 10 million men will suffer from a clinically significant eating disorder at some time in their lives, but the public conversation tends to “sensationalize” such cases, Weltzin said.

“[We] hold it up as an oddity, as opposed to typically a young adolescent, young adult or maybe a middle-aged man, who’s really struggling with their relationship with food, has gotten into, for whatever risk factors, really dangerous areas in terms of their eating, their weight, their nutritional status,” he said. “We really need to take this in a much more serious manner.”

Watch the full HuffPost Live conversation about eating disorders and gender here.

What 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Could Be About

Lady Gaga announced on Wednesday that she’ll star on the next season of “American Horror Story”: “American Horror Story: Hotel.” That’s all the official news we have at the moment, but since creator Ryan Murphy is known for sprinkling clues throughout “AHS,” it’s possible we already have an idea of what “Hotel” could be about.

Murphy already said the recurring top hat in “Freak Show” was an “arcane clue.” While we previously speculated that could connect to the popular Operation Top Hat theory, we’re not sure how the clue fits in with the hotel theme. (Maybe a bellhop-like hat?) But fortunately, Season 4 included another major hint that makes a lot of sense:

The Garden of Allah Hotel
In the penultimate episode of “Freak Show,” Elsa and her “freaks” attempt to kill Denis O’Hare’s Stanley for lying about his Hollywood connections. When he pleads for his life, he says, “I do know people in Los Angeles. My cousin works at the Garden of Allah.” Redditor Trailkeep picked up on this back in January with a post about its possible connection to Season 5.

garden of alla hotel

As it turns out, the Garden of Allah was a famous hotel in Hollywood on the Sunset Strip. Opening in 1927 and demolished in 1959, the hotel had celebrity residents and frequent guests that included F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Dorothy Parker, Errol Flynn, Greta Garbo, Humphrey Bogart, Gloria Stuart and the Marx brothers, among others.

Another interesting “AHS” connection is to the 1936 Marlene Dietrich film “The Garden of Allah,” which was inspired by the Robert S. Hichens’ 1905 novel of the same name and gave the real-life hotel its moniker. In “Freak Show,” Jessica Lange’s Elsa, herself inspired by Dietrich, references the “Allah Hotel” in the first episode.

If the fifth season is set at this hotel that would also give Murphy ample opportunity to further connect the “AHS” universes. If set in Old Hollywood, he could make connections to the Season 1 Montgomery storyline which took place from 1922 to 1926 or even the Black Dahlia storyline in 1947.

We may also have an idea of who Gaga may play in “Hotel.” The blog Vixen Varsity claims to have received a casting call back in October seeking auditions for three characters for an upcoming “AHS” promo. One of them is named Carla, described as a “classy 20-35 year old” who is possessed by a ghost.

The only problem with all this speculation? Last month, FX Networks CEO John Landgraf told TVLine it was his “hope” that Season 5 would be set in the present day.

“American Horror Story” returns in October on FX.