Golfing Great David Graham 'Plays It As it Lies' in Life and on the Greens

“Play it as it lies” is a cardinal rule in golf, the acceptance of wherever the ball lands–favorable or not. For golfing great David Graham, with a career of 35 worldwide wins who will be inducted into the World Golf Hall of Fame in July, the phrase takes on a philosophic meaning.

A native of Australia who now lives in Dallas, Graham rose to the top of the game, winning the 1979 PGA Championship and then the U.S. Open in 1981, where his final round went down in history as one of the best ever of a major championship. (His 1981 victory at Merion Golf Club also landed him on the cover of Sports Illustrated.)

Then, in 2004, during a senior tour event, congestive heart failure took it all away. “You go from having this wonderful life in a competitive environment, with good sponsors and doing what you love, to having none of it. That’s very difficult,” Graham, now 68, said over coffee in snowy Chicago, where he was in town for the Chicago Golf Show, at which he appears with his good friend and fellow golfing champion Lee Trevino.

While in the midst of treatment, Graham saw a television commercial for St. Jude’s Children’s Research Hospital, which treats children with cancer and other life-threatening conditions. As he recalled, “A little six-year-old girl in the commercial was asked, ‘How can you be so happy?’ Her answer was, ‘I can feel happy or I can feel sad. I choose to feel happy.’ I imagine that spoke to a lot of people and not just me.”

Graham discovered golf at the age of 12 when he first picked up a club–a left-handed one, even though he’s naturally right-handed. By the time he was 14, Graham had left school and landed a job as the number two assistant at the Riverdale Golf Club in Melbourne, Australia. Early one evening, Graham was at the driving range after the golfers had gone when, by chance, head golf pro George Naismith was leaving the club. “He came over and, after watching me hit a couple of shots, told me he didn’t think I’d ever be any good swinging left-handed. I had to start playing right-handed. He was a major blessing to me. I never would have succeeded if I had kept playing left-handed.”

When asked how difficult it was to make the switch, Graham gave a small smile. “If you want to do something, it’s easy to learn. I wanted to get better.”

Graham, whom the golf media describe as a “superb technician” on the course, is a role model of tenacity and discipline for anyone in any endeavor, from sports to the arts. “I don’t think golfers are born naturally. Some are born with some measure of gift. But they have to learn how to use that gift. It’s not God-given that you become a player. Without the right application, the gift is wasted.”

By the time he was about 21, Graham was on the Asian tour, where he learned the ways of competitive golf, but found it hard to make a living. The American tour was the place to be, which meant living in Australia was not an option. Graham and his wife, Maureen (they’ve been married for 45 years and he credits her for making his golf career possible), moved to the U.S., starting out in Florida where he became good friends with Jack Nicklaus, and then moved to Dallas. Graham’s first PGA victory was the 1972 Cleveland Open. He amassed a total of eight PGA Tour titles.

Asked about the 1981 U.S. Open win, Graham spoke not one bragging word about the victory–not even the final round when he shot a 67, which the legendary Ben Hogan called the finest round of golf he’d ever witnessed. “All the stars aligned,” Graham said humbly. “A lot of players have played incredibly good rounds of golf. But some are on a Thursday or a Friday [early in a tournament], or are not played on a prestigious course. Some are not seen on TV. Mine was on a Sunday at Merion and at the U.S. Open.”

While Merion was an obvious high point, Graham labeled another tournament “one of my greatest experiences”: The Warrior Open, a 36-hole golf tournament hosted by former President George W. Bush in Dallas, which featured professional golfers and wounded U.S. service members, many of whom had lost limbs and still played a good round of golf. “You don’t really comprehend where that strength comes from,” Graham said.

Perhaps, though, Graham knows better than most, having had to give up competitive golf. But he is far from forgotten as the sport honors him with a Hall of Fame induction. “It’s a way in which your peers and the powers-that-be in golf can bestow on you golf’s highest honor,” he said, and then adds: “It’s the culmination of a lot of hard work.”

David Graham with a copy of the 1981 Sports Illustrated cover after his U.S. Open victory: 2015-02-27-RenameDavidGraham.JPG

<i>The Nether</i>'s Shades of Gray at the Lucille Lortel Theater

If art has the freedom to display human foibles in the extreme, the “ick” factor of Jennifer Haley’s play The Nether, the MCC production that opened this week at the Lucille Lortel theater is through the roof. On first view, the stage is a somber gray, an interrogation room where an investigator named Morris (Merritt Wever) pushes middle aged men to near tears questioning their online languishing in a virtual paradise called The Hideaway. By the time doors open onto sunlit verdant gardens, and the baby pink of a child’s bedroom in this quick 80 minute tour de force, the suggestion of edenic innocence is as welcome to the audience as this splendid, if non-existent place is to Mr. Sims (Frank Wood) and Mr. Doyle (Peter Friedman). Morris demands to know the server, information that the men are loathe to deliver, lest they never see “Iris” again.

Iris? Iris (Sophia Anne Caruso) is a 9-year old seductress in The Hideaway, cleverly costumed (by Jessica Pabst) in pinafore and knee highs with cascading blond curls like the classic illustrations for Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. The association with this famous pedophile is apt, as we see Iris begin to work her charms on a new guest, Mr. Woodnut (Ben Rosenfield), who, like us, doesn’t quite know what he’s gotten himself into.

But this play pushes fantasy to another level, cleverly imagining the alternate places where our web fascination can lead. Of course, the more remote The Hideaway seems in possibilities, the closer its images of a lost bliss really are. This is a terrific play, impeccably acted under Anne Kauffman’s fine direction, especially by the young girl. I took my daughter to see it, and, rather than being repulsed at the violence suggested to innocence, we are still debating the issues of desire and heartbreaking love, happy to keep this vision of human potential as technology advances at the safe remove of The Nether‘s brilliant talk.

A version of this post also appears on Gossip Central.

The Funniest Auotcorrect Fails February 2015 Had To Offer

Another month, another batch of autocorrect victims.

We all make the occasional texting slip-up, but most of the time, these mistakes stay between the texter and the textee. Thankfully for us, Damn You Autocorrect compiles the greatest fails of each month for our enjoyment. This month’s victims learned NEVER to eat laxatives before going to McDonald’s, “ho” makes some excellent soup, and birthday haikus are seriously underrated. Check them out, and remember, always think before you text!

Warning, some NSFW language.

21 Glorious Vintage Photos Of Kids Having Fun Before The Internet

Life before Snapchat and Candy Crush was clearly really boring. As this collection of vintage photos spanning from the 1800s to the 1970s shows, there was just nothing to do before we had an app for everything. Poor kids.

@media only screen and (min-width : 500px) {.ethanmobile { display: none; }}

Like Us On Facebook |
Follow Us On Twitter |
Contact HuffPost Parents

Spice Up Nutrition Month With the Peruvian Superfoods Diet

March is National Nutrition Month, making for the perfect moment to check in with your eating. Believe it or not, there are still new discoveries in the world of nutrition — it’s an exciting time to explore healthy and delicious foods you might not already know. That’s why I’m using this opportunity to introduce the Peruvian Superfoods diet. Peruvian superfoods, direct from the Andes and the Amazon, promise multiple health benefits with a Latin American flair. Fortunately, these once-obscure products are now available in mainstream American supermarkets.

The Peruvian diet has an extraordinary number of superfoods, enough to rival the widely touted Mediterranean diet. There’s no scientific definition for superfoods, but I use the term to describe hardworking, functional foods that far surpass basic nutritional content. In the case of Peruvian superfoods, these are products rich in antioxidants, phytonutrients, anti-inflammatory fats, and other naturally occurring chemicals that have been associated with prevention of cardiovascular disease, cancer and diabetes; blood sugar regulation; and reduced inflammation. There may already be some Peruvian superfoods in your diet — avocados and sweet potatoes are popular examples. Those are just the beginning, because the Peruvian diet contains an incredible number of superfoods, in varieties many North Americans may have never tasted.

Discovering the Peruvian diet has also been a personal journey for me. After spending decades in the US as a dietitian working with clients in my successful practice in San Francisco, I returned to my birthplace and culinary roots in Peru to travel from the fertile Andes, where over 3,000 kinds of potatoes and 200 species of corn are grown, to the Amazonian jungle, source of thousands of extraordinary fruits, nuts and seeds. I visited open markets, restaurants, humble food stands and family kitchens, gathered stories and favorite recipes, and savored dishes packed with phenomenal disease-fighting, immunity-strengthening ingredients.

I introduced these foods to my clients, who experienced weight loss, improved moods, increased energy, and glowing skin. That inspired me to write my new book, Whole Body Reboot: The Peruvian Superfoods Diet, which constructs a diet plan for health and weight management using a series of recipes created around Peruvian superfoods. The program begins with a five-day optional smoothie reboot, featuring different-colored fruits and vegetables each day so your body receives the widest array of nutrients while revitalizing your cells. I then created recipes for delicious Peruvian-inspired meal plans that you can mix and match to your tastes and needs, whether you are male or female, an omnivore, vegetarian or vegan, or you follow a gluten-free lifestyle.

Growing up in Lima everything I ate was made from scratch; whole, fresh ingredients and real, wholesome foods are the true origins of the Peruvian diet. While Peruvian supermarkets, especially those in cities, are nowadays full of the usual suspects of packaged and processed foods, history still remains strong among rural Peruvians. Especially in the Andes and the Amazon — where, not coincidentally, there is a lower incidence of metabolic syndrome (1), hypertension, diabetes (2, 3), and obesity (4) — superfoods are still widely consumed.

So, what is in the Peruvian Superfoods diet? As I said, it is based on fresh, whole foods, loaded with nutrients. But I can’t sum it up by mentioning just one or two products, because the real strength of the Peruvian Superfoods diet is its variety. Peru has an incredibly variable landscape, ranging from deep jungle to great mountain peaks and fertile farmland.

Starting in the Amazon, you will find memory-boosting foods that improve brain health, such as sacha inchi seeds, which are high in complete protein and omega-3s (5). Lucuma is a fruit rich in antioxidants and a good source of beta-carotene and calcium (6). Looking for an antiaging fix? Camu camu is extremely high in vitamin C (7). Moving into the Andes, you will find quinoa, kañiwa, and kiwicha, three seeds that are full of antioxidants, high in protein, and high in fiber (8, 9). And you will also find the root maca, which has been shown to increase sexual drive (10). Anti-inflammatory fats come from avocados, and chia seeds (11). There are also many immune-boosting spices in the Peruvian diet such as turmeric, ají, and cumin (12).

Benefits of the nutrients, phytochemicals and antioxidants in the Peruvian diet include:

Omega-3s and anti-inflammatory fats can lower triglycerides and blood pressure and monounsaturated fats help reduce cholesterol and risk of heart disease (13).
Sources: sacha inchi seeds, and chia seeds; a good source of monounsaturated fats: avocados (14).

Disease-fighting antioxidants and phytochemicals act as free radical scavengers and contain anti-inflammatory properties that help reduce the risk of metabolic syndrome, cancer, diabetes, obesity, arthritis, all while increasing immune system support (15).
Sources: ají pepper, purple potatoes, beans and purple corn

Anti-aging micronutrients help increase vitality, longevity, energy, and improve memory, vision, and skin (15).
Sources: maca, lucuma, camu and sweet potatoes

Digestive health through probiotics and fiber, which help reduce bloating, gas, and stomach pain and cramps (16).
Sources: papaya and yacon

Obviously there are real health benefits to the Peruvian Superfoods diet, but it’s important to remember that none of these foods are the “magic bullet” that will lead to overall good health. By the same token, there are many other foods that are healthy, and many paths to nutritious eating. My point is to not replace all your current healthy foods with Peruvian ones! But, if you’re looking to make Nutrition Month your moment to change up your diet, or to put some new flavors in your already health-conscious eating, incorporating Peruvian superfoods into your diet will promises fresh, whole, healthy foods with a tasty pop for your palate.

Manuel Villacorta is a nationally recognized, award-winning registered dietitian/nutritionist with more than 18 years of experience. He is a trusted voice in the health and wellness industry. He is the author of Eating Free: The Carb Friendly Way to Lose Inches, Embrace Your Hunger, and Keep Weight Off for Good (HCI, 2012) Peruvian Power Foods: 18 Superfoods, 101 Recipes, and Anti-Aging Secrets from the Amazon to the Andes (HCI, 2013) and his newest book Whole Body Reboot: The Peruvian Superfoods Diet to Detoxify, Energize, and Supercharge Fat Loss (HCI, 2015).

References:
1) Cardenas-Quintana H., Mendozaq-Tasayco F., Roldan-Arbieto L., Sanchez-Abanto J. (2009). Prevalence of Metabolic Syndrome in People 20 Years Old and More. Revista Espanola de Salud Publica. 83, no. 2, 257-265.
2) Ramirez J., Sanchez J. (2007). Adult metabolic syndrome in Peru. Anales de la Facultad de Medicina. 68, no. 1, 38-46. “2013 International Year of Quinoa.” (2013). Quinoa 2013 International Year.
3) Arbanil-Huaman H., Pajuelo-Ramirez, J., Sanchez-Abanto J. (2010). Non transmissible diseases in Peru and their relationship with altitude. Revista de la Sociedad Peruana de Medicina Interna. 23, no. 2, 45-51.
4) Alvarez-Dongo D., Sanchez-Abanto J., Gomez-Guizado G., Tarqui-Mamani C. (2009-2010) Overweight and Obesity: Prevalence and Determining Social Factors of Overwight in the Peruvian Population. Revista Peruana de Medicina Experimental y Salud Publica. 29, no. 3, 303-13.
5) Beccaria, M., Cacciola, F., Dacha, M., Dugo, L., Dugo, P., Fanali, C., Mondello, L. (2011). Chemical characterization of sacha inchi (plukenetia volubilis l.) oil. Journal of Agriculture and Food Chemistry, Volume 59.
6) Chen, SS., Datta, N., Jiang, YM., Shi, J., Tomas-Barberan, FA., Singanusong, Y., Yao, LH., R. (2004). Flavonoids in food and their health benefits. Plant Foods for Human Nutrition, Volume 5, pages 113-22.
7) Evelázio de Souza, N., Justi, K. C., Matsushita, M., Visentainer, J.V. (2000). Nutritional composition and vitamin C stability in stored camu-camu (Myrciaria dubia) pulp. Archivos Latinoamericanos de Nutrición, Volume 50, Issue 4, Pages 405-8.
8) Espinoza C., Jacobsen S.E., Repo-Carrasco R. (2003). Nutritional Value and Use of the Andean Crops Quinoa (Chenopodium quinoa) and Kañiwa (Chenopodium pallidicaule). Food Reviews International, Volume 19, Numbers 1/2, pages 179-89.
9) Amaya-Farfán, J. & Caselato-Sousa, V. (2012). State of knowledge on amaranth grain: A comprehensive review. Journal of Food Science, Volume 77, Number 4.
10) Cordova, A., Chung, A., Gonzales, C., Gonzales, G., Vega, K., Villena, A. (2001). Lepidium meyenii (maca) improved semen parameters in adult men. Asian Journal of Andrology. Volume 3.
11) Barcelo-Coblijn G, Murphy EJ. (2009). Alpha-linolenic acid and its conversion to longer chain n-3 fatty acids: Benefits for human health and a role in maintaining tissue n-3 fatty acid levels. Progress in Lipid Research, Volume 48, pages 355-74.
12) National Nutrient Database for Standard Reference. Full report (All Nutrients): 02009, Spices, chili powder. (2005). Agricultural Research Service United States Department of Agriculture, Release 26.
13) Domínguez, H., Juárez, C., Ledesma, L., Luna, H., Montalvo, C., Morán, L., Munari, F. (1996). Monounsaturated fatty acid (avocado) rich diet for mild hypercholesterolemia. Archives of Medical Research, Volume 27, Pages 519-523
14) Chin, YW., D’Ambrosio, SM., Ding, H., Kinghorn, AD. (2007). Chemopreventative characteristics of avocado fruit. Seminars in Cancer Biology. Volume 17, pages 386-94
15) Lobo, V., Patil, A., Phatak, A., & Chandra, N. (2010, July 1). Free radicals, antioxidants and functional foods: Impact on human health.
16) Gorbach, S. (2000). Probiotics and gastrointestinal health. The American Journal of Gastroenterology. Volume 95, Issue 1, Pages S2-S4.

African Astronomy: The Top Safari Escapes for Sleeping Under the Stars

By Kristen McKenzie, HotelsCombined.com

Africa is renowned for its wildlife, but it also boasts some of the globe’s most incredible al fresco sleeping quarters. After combing through hundreds of incredible safari accommodation options available on our website, we here at HotelsCombined have selected six truly standout open-air beds from which to stargaze:

Nkwichi Lodge, Mozambique

2015-02-25-nkwichilodgestarbed.jpg

The outdoor ‘Lake of Stars’ bed at this waterfront lodge is the very definition of romance. Guests can choose whether they’d like to enjoy this unique sleeping arrangement either on a deserted sand beach or on a private rock island – both options are equally stunning.

Kagga Kamma, South Africa

2015-02-25-KaggaKammapic4.jpg

The open air room at this eco-friendly resort is situated on a remote rocky outcrop and features a double bed, glowing fire and the luxury of an outdoor bathroom. A private candlelit dinner, complete with bucket of champagne, can also be arranged upon request.

Sabuk Lodge, Kenya

2015-02-25-SabukLodge.jpg

The dry climate in Kenya’s Laikipia plateau, which is located along the equator, allows the Sabuk Lodge’s cottages to remain open to the elements year-round. The plush, oversized beds are surrounded by mosquito netting so guests can comfortably gaze up at the cosmos before drifting off to sleep.

Lion Sands River Lodge, South Africa

2015-02-25-Lionsands.jpg

The Chakley Treehouse at this stunning wilderness reserve is a must-splurge to add on any travel bucket list. A lavish platform set on stilts above the plains, guests can safely observe the wildlife roaming beneath them whilst enjoying the incredible African night sky.

Tongabezi Lodge, Zambia

2015-02-25-Tongabezi.jpg

Tucked away along the banks of the Zambezi River, this retreat provides a truly secluded, serene experience. Their treehouse suite, housed among the branches of a majestic Ebony tree, is ideal for star gazing.

Baines’ Camp, Botswana

2015-02-25-luxurylodgebotswanaBainesCamp05.jpg

The four-poster beds in the luxury suites here can be easily rolled out onto the private wooden deck so guests can get up close and personal to nature. In addition to constellations, the view here overlooks the Boro River where hippo sightings abound.

Kurdish Fighters Capture Tel Hamees, ISIS Stronghold In Syria

BEIRUT (AP) — Backed by U.S.-led coalition airstrikes, Kurdish fighters fought their way Friday into a northeastern Syrian town that was a key stronghold of Islamic State militants, only days after the group abducted dozens of Christians in the volatile region, Syrian activists and Kurdish officials said.

The victory marks a second blow to the extremist IS group in a month, highlighting the growing role of Syria’s Kurds as the most effective fighting force against the Islamic State. In January, Kurdish forces drove IS militants from the town of Kobani near the Turkish border after a months-long fight, dealing a very public defeat to the extremists. But it is also tempered by this week’s horrific abductions by IS militants of more than 220 Christian Assyrians in the same area, along the fluid and fast shifting front line in Syria.

The town of Tel Hamees in Syria’s northeastern Hassakeh province is strategically important because it links territory controlled by IS in Syria and Iraq.

The province, which borders Turkey and Iraq, is predominantly Kurdish but also has populations of Arabs and predominantly Christian Assyrians and Armenians.

“We are now combing the town for explosives and remnants of terrorists,” said Redur Khalil, a spokesman for the Kurdish fighters, known as the People’s Protection Units or YPG.

Speaking to The Associated Press over the phone from the outskirts of Tel Hamees, he said the town was a key stronghold for IS and had served as a staging ground for the group’s operations in the Iraqi town of Sinjar and the city of Mosul.

Dislodging the group from Tel Hamees cuts a supply line from Iraq, Khalil said.

The push on the town’s eastern and southeastern edges came after the Kurdish troops, working with Christian militias and Arab tribal fighters, seized dozens of nearby villages from the Islamic State extremists. U.S.-led coalition forces provided cover, striking at IS infrastructure in the region for days.

More than 200 militants died in the fighting, and at least eight troops fighting alongside YPG, including an Australian national who has been with the Kurdish forces for three months, Khalil said.

The British-based Syrian Observatory for Human Rights, which relies on a network of activists inside Syria, said IS defenses collapsed and the militants fled after Kurdish fighters broke into Tel Hamees from the east and south.

The Observatory’s director, Rami Abdurrahman, said the Kurds seized more than 100 villages around Tel Hamees and that ground battles and air strikes around the town have killed at least 175 IS fighters in the past several days in some of the latest losses for the group since Kobani.

Some 15,000 villagers have fled the fighting, he added.

The Kurds in Syria and Iraq have emerged as the most effective force fighting IS, which controls about a third of Iraq and Syria — much of it captured in a lighting blitz last spring and summer, as Iraqi army forces melted away in the face of the militant onslaught.

In Syria, they have teamed up with moderate rebels for territorial gains against the group.

Elsewhere in Hassakeh, IS fighters this week captured dozens of mostly Christian villages to the west of Tel Hamees — taking at least 220 Assyrian Christians hostage, according to activists. The fate of those abducted was still unknown.

On Thursday, video emerged of IS militants smashing ancient Mesopotamian artifacts in a museum in Mosul, Iraq’s second largest city.

Irina Bokova, the head of the U.N. cultural agency, UNESCO, denounced the group’s destruction of ancient statues and artifacts as “cultural cleansing” and a war crime that the world must punish.

From Paris, where the agency is based, Bokova said she could not watch to the end the Islamic State video posted Thursday that shows men using sledgehammers to smash Mesopotamian artworks in Iraq’s northern city of Mosul. She called the video “a real shock.”

The Louvre Museum in Paris said the destruction “marks a new stage in the violence and horror, because all of humanity’s memory is being targeted in this region that was the cradle of civilization, the written word, and history.”

French President Francois Hollande also condemned the “barbarity” of the destructions.

“What the terrorists want is to destroy all that makes humanity,” he said Friday during a visit to the Philippines.

Elsewhere in Syria, at least eight civilians were killed in a car bomb that exploded outside the Bilal Mosque in the rebel-held town of Dumeir, east of Damascus. Many others were wounded in the blast, which occurred as worshippers were leaving the mosque following Friday prayers.

Another car bomb went off outside a mosque in Nasseriya, near Dumeir, also causing multiple casualties. It was not immediately clear who was behind the bombings.

___

Associated Press writers Ashraf Khalil in Beirut and Angela Charlton in Paris contributed to this report.

At Aetna, a C.E.O.'s Management by Mantra

On a recent wintry afternoon, Mark T. Bertolini, the 58-year-old chief executive of Aetna, the health insurer, was sitting in his Hartford office wearing a dark suit and a crisp, white, French-cuffed shirt.

This Inseparable Father And Son Doggie Duo Have Love, Now They Just Need A Home

This handsome pair of dogs is Oscar and Olyvar, a father-and-son duo who came into an Indiana shelter together last spring. Staff quickly learned they can’t bear to be apart.

“They are kenneled together and a few times they were separated to be neutered, or just taken in separate directions during a walk with volunteers. They were always looking for each other and crying,” says Terre Haute Humane Society spokesperson Toni Minniear.

dogs

“They love to play together and snuggle and sleep together,” she added. “They usually sleep on their sides, but they make sure they are touching each other’s body [even if] it is just touching each other’s paw.”

Oscar is the elder one — the one with the ears that point down — and is about 9 years old. His boy Olyvar, whose ears defy gravity, is about 6.

While not much is known about what their lives were like before these two wound up at the shelter, “our assumption is their lives were better than usual [because] to Olyvar knows and was taught tricks,” says Minniear.

Now, they spend much of their time being walked and cuddled by shelter volunteers, who believe that Oscar could sit, shake and even dance if he wanted to. He’s certainly smart enough, they say, but he’s just a little too laid back to show off.

The dogs’ big smiles, easygoing natures, and the way they push their heads into any hand that’s giving them a scratch endear Oscar and Olyvar to everyone.

But after some 9 months without anyone coming to claim them, the hope for these loving pups is now almost heartbreakingly modest.

“I don’t think Oscar and Olyvar would ask for much … An ideal home would be a stable home where they would be inside and allowed to be a family member,” says Minniear. “We cry and laugh and hug them, to let them know they will be OK. And they look at us as if they know that.”

(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = “//connect.facebook.net/en_US/all.js#xfbml=1”; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs);}(document, ‘script’, ‘facebook-jssdk’));

Interested? Check out Olyvar’s and Oscar’s adoption profiles. You can also find out more about adopting this dad and son duo — among other pets — on the Terre Haute Humane Society’s Facebook page.

Get in touch at arin.greenwood@huffingtonpost.com if you have an animal story to share!

Aural Fixation: RIP Mixtape

“Isn’t this cool?” I said to him, holding up the t-shirt. It had come as part of singer/songwriter Martin Sexton’s pre-order bundle for his new CD, Mixtape Of The Open Road. A list of tour dates skated down the backside. On the front was a cassette tape rendered in retro-distressed style. He stared at it for a couple of seconds and made a snuffling sound.

“What?”

“That doesn’t make you feel old?”

“Concert tees never go out of style, baby!”

“No,” he said, nodding to the front. “Tapes. Mixtapes. A certain generation has no clue what those things are.”

I considered this and first thought I refuse to allow the term “certain generation” in this house. THAT makes me feel old. But, then I realized he was right. The mixtape is a rarefied artifact, and I miss it mightily.

Once upon a time, the mixtape was the audio valentine of choice. It was the preferred method of telling a guy or girl you wanted to hold their sweaty palm in yours and pretend to watch a movie. The quickest and most devastating litmus test of relationship material is the conversation you have about music. I subscribe whole heartedly to that great line spoken by John Cusack’s character in High Fidelity: “What really matters is what you like, not what you are like. Books, records, films — these things matter. Call me shallow, but it’s the fuckin’ truth.”

In days of yore (aka the ’70s), it was relatively easy to suss out a person’s musical interests. Vinyl was impossible to escape. If a record collection wasn’t arrogantly displayed like the rhino heads and cheetah pelts of big game hunters, that meant: A. The person had something nasty and shameful to hide, like The Best of Bread or Tito Puente Does Motown, or B. Music was not part of their social vernacular. In both cases, your chances of getting laid plummeted. I’ve never had a date, let alone a relationship, last where his musical tastes did not surpass, compliment, or challenge my own. I remember sitting across from the table on a date with a perfectly nice boy human who told me that music was not really something he “noticed.” Check please. That’s why the mixtape is such high stakes territory; it’s a lyrical Cyrano de Bergerac saying something important to someone that you’re too shy or repressed or straight up chicken-shit to say yourself.

Because you’re offering up more than what speaks to you musically, you’re carving out a piece of your soul and giving it to this person. I know that sounds uber-dramatic, but so isn’t adolescence. It’s a trail of aural breadcrumbs you’re leaving for the person to follow. Will they pick up what you’re throwing down and decode your secret message, the one that says I love you or please don’t break my heart or are you the one who finally gets me? Will they hear you saying: “I want to show you my brain,” or “Can we please get super funky naked together? Like, a lot? Like, as much as humanly possible?” Sidenote: That’s the Al Green, Marvin Gaye, Prince mixtape. Potent. You get one of those and manage to keep your panties from dropping, then you belong in a museum next to the statue of Michelangelo’s David.

As soon as I knew I liked a boy, I would start mentally building the mixtape. For better or for worse — usually for worse, in my case, a prematurely-given mixtape is the same as texting someone sitting in front of you who has just given you their digits; it’s very bad form — that kid knew who he was agreeing to sit with on the school bus. The mixtape is as vulnerable as it gets, and that includes the angry, bitter mixtape of tunes that seem to be the only things to adequately convey your roiling angst and searing pain over the one who has done you wrong. I am sure I have a shoebox molding in the back of a closet somewhere with a mixtape or two given to me by boys who ultimately stomped my heart into the dirt. I know if I found them, I would turn the plastic cases over in my hands, study the fading ink of handwriting, suddenly familiar, but also foreign, and without even putting it in a player (a device that no longer exists) would be able to hear each tune and feel the way I did the first time I listened.

I know we don’t listen, make, consume or share music today the same way we did even ten years ago. I see the potential in a lot of innovation sweeping across the art space, from books and music to film and graphic design and video games. But there’s a part of me that feels the pull to preserve ritual and rite of passage. The shared playlist (the one that could go on in perpetuity. How many Bare Naked Ladies songs can you stand?), the “I burned this for you,” just don’t hold the same gravitas. They just don’t.

I popped Martin Sexton’s disc onto the digital turntable spinning inside my laptop and settled in to listen and marvel a little bit over a “certain generation” who will never know what it is to bare your soul in the magnetic spools of a mixtape.

2015-02-27-martinsexton_mixtape.jpg