How About Instead of Deciding If a "Good Divorce" Is Better Than a "Bad Marriage" We Try Harder to Stay Together?

I remember the day well: the day we stole my son’s innocence, the day we told him we were getting a divorce.

He was stunned. He cried. And begged and pleaded. And cried some more. And the next day, when he woke up, forgot for a second and then remembered again, he cried again. He was 12. And his father and I broke his heart and shattered his world that day. He was never the same happy-go-lucky kid again.

Lately there has been a lot of debate about whether a “good divorce” is better than a “bad marriage,” for the sake of the kids. I think we’re forgetting about the third option: if you are in a bad marriage, and you have kids, how about doing whatever you need to do to make the marriage better? For the kids’ sake.

For me, hindsight has definitely been 20/20: we should have tried harder to stay together. My kids definitely paid the price for my “good divorce”. And as a school counselor I have talked to hundreds of kids who are definitely not better off after divorce.

(And just to be clear: I am not saying I think everyone should stay married no matter what. For example, in situations that are dangerous for kids, like when there is abuse going on or drug use it’s a no-brainer: get out.)

But in the case of most of us, it is not because of a life and death situation that we are splitting up. For most of us, we are divorcing because we’ve grown apart, or we lost that loving feeling, or we no longer see eye to eye on things, or we have different goals, or we met someone who understands us better than our spouse, or we argue too much. etc. etc. And no matter how much we try to justify it, it is not good or easy or best for kids. They are just the innocent bystanders and they get dragged along for the ride.

I believe we owe it to our kids to do right by them, which in the majority of situations, means doing what we can to keep the family together.

We also owe it to them to “walk the talk”–to model for them the kinds of things we want them to learn as we raise them into adulthood. Like how the right thing to do isn’t always the easy thing. And when you start something, you need to finish it. And sometimes, when the going gets tough, you need to keep going. And, just because something is hard doesn’t mean you should quit.

Bottom line is I think we owe it to our kids to try as hard as we need to in order to make our marriages work. In good times and bad. For better or worse.

Decadent Bacon Cinnamon Rolls Recipe Video

You’ll never look at cinnamon rolls the same way again. When bacon is tucked away into this fluffy pastry, the only thing left to do is take a big bite and embrace your foodgasm.

With only 2 ingredients, these bacon cinnamon rolls will fulfill your wildest food porn dreams. Let’s begin, shall we?

Prep Time: 5 minutes
Cook Time: 15 minutes
Total Time: 20 minutes

Servings: 6

Ingredients:
1 roll Pillsbury Cinnamon Rolls With Icing
8 strips bacon

FOR THE FULL RECIPE, CLICK HERE.

Original post by Alvin Zhou on Spoon University.

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Why I'll Never Lie About My Age

I was at a dinner party recently, chatting up a small group of men and women, all of us around the same age, when someone made a joke about aging. My ears perked and I blurted that I had turned The Big 5-O.

They were stunned. Sadly, not for the reason I had hoped. A “No way! Seriously? I thought you were 35!” would have been nice, (a girl can dream…), but what I heard was equally shocking.

One of the men leaned in, like talking to a naive child, and said, “You should never EVER share your age.” The rest agreed. My first thought was to blame it on the wine, though my glass was full, or claim to have holiday-seasonal-social Tourette’s. (I have used this tactic before. Successfully.) I smiled. My lip twitched.

Apparently, aging is a bad thing. Admitting it is even worse.

Anyone can tell from looking at me in my party dress that I didn’t just come from prom, but putting a number on it is like the kiss of death. People know you’re older than 40, they just don’t want to know by how much.

When told she didn’t look her age, Gloria Steinem declared, “This is what 40 looks like!”

Aging, for most women, is a liability after a certain point. Our wisdom is valued, sadly, the rings around our tree-trunks are not. Men get more distinguished looking and we become, well, crones. Just look at Hollywood to see how this plays out. Women fight aging so hard that most of the women over 40 or 50 don’t look like they age at all. In fact, I’m quite sure JLo is going backwards. It’s just not fair.

Being told you look good for your age is like getting kissed and slapped at the same time. (If you are a fan of Fifty Shades of Grey, you might like this.) Let it sink in for a moment — you’re getting complimented that you don’t look old, because, let’s face it — you are.

Aging gracefully is my goal. Besides, I’m scared of knives and I’d rather save my money for sushi and wine and nice handbags. The best thing I do to fight looking “old” is dying my hair — without it I would look like Cruella Deville. Avoiding being seen in direct sunlight is also a good strategy, but one that’s hard to pull off. Walking fast enough to create a blur works too. It’s all smoke and mirrors, baby.

“You are denying your very existence by trying to lie about your age.” — Oprah Winfrey

I’m not going to lie and tell you that turning 50 was easy, it wasn’t. At least not at first. I dreaded it like I dread flying on airplanes. Waking up in a panic everyday for the month before the big launch day arrives. My reaction surprised me. For years I thought I would ring in my 50th year with great fanfare, or at least a disco ball.

Leaving my 40s felt like I was losing something I once had or, more closely, like falling off a cliff. All of a sudden any double-digit number beginning with a 4 or less seemed young. So incredibly young. Almost infantile. But then my birthday passed. And within a month or so I forgot that I was half-a-century year old. Or that I am supposed to become invisible to men. (FYI, that didn’t happen. I hope it never does.)

“It would help not to treat age as if it were any less of a pleasure than it was when you were six and saying, ‘I’m six and a half.’ We could be saying, ‘I’m fifty and a half’ and say it with joy.” — Gloria Steinem

I was thrilled when I heard the next Bond Girl is Italian beauty, Monica Bellucci, who also happens to be — wait for it — 50! The Internet was flooded with posts from the media, clearly the producers of the sexy Bond adventure had lost their minds when they cast a mature woman in a role that has always been filled by young smooth-skinned nubile creatures. Every tweet or Facebook status was dying to know if we thought Ms. Bellucci was too old to be considered sexy.

I mean, really, 50 and sexy, is that even possible?

When I asked my Facebook friends to share their thoughts, a few said Monica Bellucci and Daniel Craig were both too old. In my humble opinion, I think they should get their eyesight checked. To me, sexy doesn’t look just one way. It’s not always what’s all smooth and tight. Certainly, looks get my attention. But, for me, what holds it and what’s most sexy begins between the ears.

Now that I’m over the stigma and (others’) devastation of admitting my age, being this age doesn’t feel old. It doesn’t feel like anything, really. I still feel like I did 20 or 30 years ago, plus a few aches and pains. I know one thing, I will never lie about my age. If I’m lucky enough to be on the receiving end of a compliment, I’ll accept it gladly. Besides, my ego could never recover from the sting of fibbing and receiving an eye-roll.

So tell me, do you lie about your age?

Earlier on Huff/Post50:

For A More Creative Brain, Travel

There are plenty of things to be gained from going abroad: new friends, new experiences, new stories.

But living in another country may come with a less noticeable benefit, too: Some scientists say it can also make you more creative.

Writers and thinkers have long felt the creative benefits of international travel. Ernest Hemingway, for example, drew inspiration for much of his work from his time in Spain and France. Aldous Huxley, the author of Brave New World, moved from the U.K. to the U.S. in his 40s to branch out into screenwriting. Mark Twain, who sailed around the coast of the Mediterranean in 1869, wrote in his travelogue Innocents Abroad that travel is “fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.”

In recent years, psychologists and neuroscientists have begun examining more closely what many people have already learned anecdotally: that spending time abroad may have the potential to affect mental change. In general, creativity is related to neuroplasticity, or how the brain is wired. Neural pathways are influenced by environment and habit, meaning they’re also sensitive to change: New sounds, smells, language, tastes, sensations, and sights spark different synapses in the brain and may have the potential to revitalize the mind.

New Heaven, New Earth: Is Religion Being Replaced With Spirituality?

Heaven is real! People in all walks of life are coming forward with experiences of Spiritual Awakening. Many hundreds are reporting Near Death Experiences from accidents or serious illness when they find themselves floating above their bodies and entering a realm of vast peace and unlimited love. Others are reporting being next to love ones in their last hours who are seeing and talking to relatives on the other side welcoming them to let go and join them. People are reporting experiences of being in silence, meditation, and prayer where their thoughts disappear and they find a space in their hearts of intimate acceptance, profound understanding. An overpowering experience of inner light or love seems to be common to the many who have had a spiritual awakening.

A new Heaven is the direct experience of the Divine being reported in all parts of the world. A new Earth is the life changing result of the incredible news. Best selling books, movies, internet sites, all the chatter about life after life are changing the hearts and minds of doctors, chaplains, hospice workers, and all of us who are facing the mortality of friends, family, and our own. The personal accounts being shared of Heaven are knocking down the door of many minds as hearts are being opened.

Meanwhile Pope Francis, a champion of mercy and forgiveness is talking about his work may soon be done. The Dali Lama, a leader of compassion and understanding is saying that for the first time in hundreds of years there maybe no new incarnation for the next Dali Lama. Is there a connection to their popularity and the fast growing movement of people who are rejecting religion saying they are spiritual instead? Is it a coincidence that more and more people are shying away from the dogma of religion for a spirituality of compassion, forgiveness, and service to others?

Could religion as we know it be ending? Could the future be less structured, more inclusive groups, giving to and embracing a God of love in ourselves, others, and nature? Do the intellectuals and their theology have meaning as people hear the message in the life review reported in Near Death Experiences? They say again and again,”What we do to one another is what we do to ourselves.” In other words, people are waking up to the message to love one another as we would want to be loved! How much and how long can religion argue with the simple truth of living a life of being good to ourselves and our neighbor?

David Sunfellow, a leading networker for the Near Death Experience community, is saying, “For the first time in history there is a new religion which does not have a charismatic leader or a sacred book. It is leaderless, with no theology of its own. It is truly grass roots changing what people think about death and therefore about life itself.” Author and scholar, Kenneth Ring states, “There is a NDE virus. This virus is how people are changed just hearing about Near Death Experiences and stories of spiritual awakening in others. People are changed just listening and feeling the experience of people’s most personal journeys. Meanwhile, death, instead as something to avoid talking about or to fear, is an open door, we all go through, to welcome. There is a great love being discovered and explored.”

If religion is to survive could it be less materialistic and self serving and more concerned with the beauty of life and preserving the beauty of the planet? Can religion give up being judgmental and inspire us to reach out and reach within to the seat of our soul, God, the heart in everyone? The power of mindfulness, learning to be present, finding purpose by expressing our gifts and joy, realizing our outer life is only as balanced as we honor and develop our inner life-all are moving people to a new Heaven and new Earth. Of course many people are both religious and spiritual. But for others it is the difference between trying to live a certain set of beliefs and living one’s heart and embracing the heart of others. Will religion go the way of the horse and carriage? Will we miss it?

The new Heaven and new Earth begins everyday for many as we take a step out of the hyper activity of our mental world and sit in the stillness of the heart. Here we drop our awareness like a stone into a great ocean. The stone (which is our stress) dissolves into a vast beauty. New Heaven and new Earth is no more and no less then receiving the depths of inner peace within each of us and bringing this peace into our daily lives. It is a practice, a path, a life which gives us the humility and courage to live a magical life with all the wonder and nakedness included.

Make No "Mistake," Cam Is One to Watch!

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It’s notoriously hard for new female artists to break through at country radio, but Sony’s Arista Nashville is betting big on its newest singer/songwriter, Cam, and her upbeat debut “My Mistake” to be the exception to the rule.

The California native, who has found success as a songwriter penning both pop and country hits, landed 44 first-week radio adds by her first official week at country radio, scoring praise from some of the format’s heavy hitters. Syndicated host Bobby Bones said, “You have it. You really do have ‘it.’ Very few people have it, and you do.” Nate Deaton, general manager of station KRTY in San Jose, California, agreed, predicting “she is the female who’s going to get country radio out of ‘we don’t play females.'”

It remains to be seen if Cam will one day join the ranks of superstars Carrie and Miranda, but for now, the newcomer is a refreshing voice in the genre. The four songs from her debut EP, Welcome to Cam Country, racked up close to five million streams on Spotify in less than a month, helping the young artist find an ever-expanding audience. After a month-long exclusivity window with Spotify, fans can now also purchase the four-song EP at iTunes.

“I’m so proud to give everyone a glimpse into the world we have been working so hard to create,” Cam said in a press release of the EP. “I chose these four songs off the album, covering the widest range of emotions to give more people a chance to recognize themselves in the songs. This is just the beginning of the adventure, and everyone is welcome.”

In addition to finding fans in radio programmers and country music loyalists, Cam’s “adventure” also includes several early celebrity supporters. One notable fan, Emmylou Harris, vouched for Cam at last year’s Country Music Hall of Fame fundraiser concert, All For The Hall, in Los Angeles. “When Merle [Haggard] couldn’t make it to the benefit concert, Emmylou told them to call me!” Cam explains. “I was so grateful, and honestly surprised. But Emmylou said, ‘You’re good, that’s why you’re here.'”

Here’s an excerpt from my recent conversation with the rising country star.

You wrote or co-wrote all of the songs on your debut EP, and you’ve also written for other artists, including Miley Cyrus. How do you make your songwriting so distinctive?
In the beginning I tried really hard to fit in, but people still told me how unique and different I sounded. So now I just follow my gut, work hard, and continually keep my standards really high.

Who are your greatest musical influences?
My co-writers and producers are my little family, and we have all shaped each other from the very beginning on how to make music. Of course we are always hoping to sound as good as the best artists out there without sounding like them.

Where do you find yourself most at peace and most creative?
I feel at peace when I’m by the ocean, under the Redwood trees in Northern California, sitting around a bonfire in Leiper’s Fork, Tennessee, or riding horses out in the Southern California desert.

If you could time travel, which era of country music would you want to live in and why?
The Bakersfield Sound: to be a part of a new wave of country music coming from California, pushing boundaries (whether they knew it or not), making people dance, and wearing sequins.

Whose career would you like yours to be like in 10 years?
Well, I’d like it to be completely my own, but I’m always inspired by Zac Brown Band; everything they’ve created ties back to the strong foundation in their music & brand.

What’s a song fans would be surprised you know every word to?
The Fraggle Rock theme song!

Get to know Cam in this fun introductory video, set to “My Mistake,” ahead of her Grand Ole Opry debut on May 29.

Microsoft Had At One Point Considered Buying Nintendo

microsoft__logoAccording to an earlier report, it was revealed that prior to Microsoft launching the original Xbox, the company had some pretty wild and crazy ideas on how to enter the gaming market, which at that time was dominated by the likes of Sony and Nintendo. One of those ways was to give the console away for free, but it seems that another way would have been to buy up Nintendo.

This is according to Seamus Blackley who was the original Xbox’s co-creator. In an interview with Gamesindustry.biz, it seems one of the ideas that was being tossed around at that time was to buy out Nintendo. “Some even pushed the notion that Microsoft should make a huge play and just gobble up Nintendo. ‘Just name it, name a bad idea and it was something we had to deal with,’ Blackley lamented.”

Of course we can’t say for sure how serious Microsoft had considered the idea back then, but without doubt it would have been an interesting one. More importantly it would have been interesting to see how agreeable Nintendo would have been to such an idea at that time. Even in the recent years with the Japanese company struggling with their Wii U console, they have remained steadfast in their strategy so we’re not sure they would have agreed to such an idea to begin with.

Naturally we’re curious as to what the world might be like if Microsoft had acquired Nintendo. We might only be seeing two platforms now versus three, but what do you guys think? What do you think the landscape would be now had that happened?

Microsoft Had At One Point Considered Buying Nintendo

, original content from Ubergizmo. Read our Copyrights and terms of use.

Five Reasons Your Kids Will Love The Broadmoor in Colorado

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Photo by Michael Mundt

You might think a turn-of-the-20th-century Colorado resort modeled after old-world European craftsmanship resting at the base of majestic Cheyenne Mountain would be breathtaking. And you would be right.

You might also think this esteemed enclave that’s attracted numerous dignitaries, magnates and celebrities throughout nearly 100 years wouldn’t be suited to everyday families. And you would be dead wrong.

The Broadmoor in Colorado Springs, Colo., is the classic union of upper-crust society and the rugged Old West, minus any pretense. Opened in June 1918 by Spencer and Julie Penrose, the “Grand Dame of the Rockies” may exude Ivy League formality. But behind that pink-stucco façade awaits unadulterated, let-your-hair-down fun.

Here are five reasons my family and I can’t wait to return to this mountainside retreat.

1. Play at the Broadmoor

I don’t tend to love bowling alleys. Because typically it means I’ve been forced by my husband or sons to actually bowl, which inevitably results in taunting from all three.

“Mommy needs the bumpers!” They like to chant after my frequent gutter balls.

But a bowling alley complete with gourmet food and desserts that take my mind off of my deplorable skills? Yes, please.

Not only does the resort’s six-lane alley offer a “play” area with shuffleboard and pool tables, as well as gaming consoles like Wii. But there’s also an extensive wine and local craft-beer selection, in addition to mouthwatering menu items including New Mexico Nachos and Chicago-style hot dogs. Even sushi.

But I was most fond of the dessert menu, a modern twist of five nostalgia-inducing, childhood favorites: chocolate ho-hos, strawberry pop tarts, nutter butters, caramel delights (modeled after Samoas of Girl Scout fame) and–drum roll, please–drumsticks.

How is a girl to choose?

Duh. You just order all five. Worth. Every. Calorie.

2. Family Programs

Asking my boys what they loved most about staying at the Broadmoor inadvertently caused a fight because each wanted to be the first to answer: “The classes!” Followed by, “Hey, I wanted to say that!” “No, I did!”

Sibling spats aside, said classes included an omelet-cooking demonstration at the resort’s Natural Epicurean–a casual yet sophisticated eatery focused on fresh, organic fare–followed by a fly-tying class that left me cross-eyed. (No offense, fly-fisherman. But those flies are so danged microscopic, it’s maddening!)

Part of the Family Passport program, visitors from November through early April can participate in complimentary, family-friendly activities–exercise or dance, photography and golf, to name a few–filling in their “passport” along the way.

It’s exactly what attracts Buena Vista, Colo., mom Lindsey Mueller and her husband, Ryan, to the Broadmoor twice a year during the winter months. Along with their two daughters, ages 2 and 7, the resort offers a “trifecta of fun,” she says: family time, solo time and couple time. (Babysitting services are available.)

“When we’re there, we forget that we’re close to home,” Mueller says. “Which is a lovely thing.”

3. Family amenities

I have to admit as a third-generation Coloradan that my perception of the Broadmoor was that it was a bit…um…uppity. What could possibly await a modest family of four beyond its crested enclosure?

The short answer? Everything.

In addition to the bowling alley and requisite pools–three including two year-round ones (an indoor Spa pool and outdoor, heated lap pool) as well as a seasonal, outdoor infinity pool–there’s an on-site movie theater that’s free for guests.

And the rooms? I’m not one to get overly giddy about lodging. But we stayed in one of the resort’s six Cottages comprising a grand, central parlor surrounded by eight individual suites, ideal for a family gathering. Or, in our case, perfect for my boys to spread out–i.e. fully mess up the place–reducing chances for brotherly combat.

A final, family-friendly touch? Milk and cookies awaiting us after dinner on our last night there, complete with the adult version: wine and gourmet chocolate.

4. Kid-friendly dining

I’m not talking standard kid fare like macaroni and cheese or chicken fingers. I mean real “Youth Menus” tailored specifically to kids.

At the resort’s Ristorante Del Lago, for example, my kids’ “first course” options included house mozzarella and heirloom tomatoes, or a salad of baby lettuces and herbs. In addition to pasta and pizza options, they could also select “plates” like rotisserie chicken with fire-roasted potatoes, or cod with mint-honey carrots.

Of course, my 8-year-old son chose his standby, cheese pizza. But it was so good I had to sneak a slice for myself. And his choice of dessert–Tartufo di Pizzo, a chocolate and pistachio ice cream truffle–made me set aside my own so I could savor more bites of his.

As self-professed food snobs, Mueller says, the Broadmoor’s youth menus are another draw for her family.

“When we eat, really want to eat at a nice restaurant,” she says.

The problem, however, is that they often like to bring along their daughters. But not every restaurant is as accommodating as their favorite Broadmoor eatery, The Summit.

“They’re just so gracious to our children,” she says.

And if you get a chance to frequent the resort’s British-style pub, The Golden Bee, kids will love “getting stung.” I don’t want to ruin the surprise. But I guarantee the fish and chips won’t be the only thing they’ll remember!

5. Cheyenne Mountain Zoo

Established in 1926 by Spencer Penrose as the Cheyenne Mountain Zoological society to house his collection of exotic animals (adjacent to the Broadmoor), the resort offers free shuttle service daily to what I would argue is one of the most beautiful zoos in the world.

Not only is its mountain setting unique (elevation 6,800 feet), but it’s also a special treat to feed the zoo’s renowned giraffe herd, said to be the largest in any zoo. Another unique feature? Tour the property via Mountaineer Sky Ride, a chair-life style offering spectacular views of the zoo and Colorado Springs.

For more information, visit www.cmzoo.org.

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Photo courtesy of The Broadmoor Colorado Springs

Even Mortal Kombat Has A Line The Developers Will Not Cross

mortal kombat xThe Mortal Kombat franchise is an extremely gory and gruesome one, with the developers coming up with all sorts of creative ways one could pull off a fatality. In fact a recent fatality compilation video had us cringing at just how gruesome things could get in the game, especially with its brand new graphics.

That being said it seems that despite the violent nature of the game, the developers at NetherRealm have a line that they will not cross. Speaking to the folks at GameSpot, NetherRealm’s head Ed Boon talked about the violent nature of the game and how there are times when even they think they might have taken things too far.

“Oh yea, yea. Every game, we have these brainstorming meetings, and…somebody will suggest something and it’s more of a gut feeling that, you know, that’s a little too far. I think every single game, [there are] those discussions where, you know, everyone’s trying to push the envelope, but there’s always a line that you never want to cross.”

We can’t be sure what those lines are, but considering that some of the fatalities involve pulling out entrails through the mouth, punching a hole through the body of your hapless victim, popping eyes, slicing bodies in half, and etc., we have to say that the line has be pretty far.

Even Mortal Kombat Has A Line The Developers Will Not Cross

, original content from Ubergizmo. Read our Copyrights and terms of use.

Asbestos Litigation Industry Buzzes Over NYC's Silver Case, 'Iron Triangle'

For a while it was looking like a heavyweight showdown of sorts, at least as civil litigation panel discussions go, being billed as the “Battle in the Big Apple,” featuring a name attorney from the Weitz & Luxenberg firm at the apex of New York’s wildest political scandal in years.

Airplane tickets were rescheduled and conference calls postponed. But, perhaps showing how genteel such panels have become, the discussion at the Beverly Hills Perrin Conference on “cutting edge” asbestos litigation issues centered on relatively arcane case management orders. To the disappointment of some, Perry Weitz was not asked a single “gotcha” question about his firm’s role in the arrest and indictment of New York Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver. Talk about lackluster cross examination!

But, that particular panel aside, the “Silver case” has ushered in plenty of discussion for the asbestos litigation community. Much of the conference’s hallway speculation centered on how the case might impact other “magnet jurisdictions” around the country. Victims’ attorneys discount that, noting that the Silver situation may be several things, but that it remains limited to specific facts in New York.

In particular, speculation focused on whether the Silver-case “environment” can cast a shadow onto other local jurisdictions. That argument focuses on places like the longstanding capital of asbestos litigation, Madison County, IL. But it also included others like up-and-coming Newport News, VA, which was included on a recent tort reform group’s “Judicial Hellholes” watchlist.

The group says Virginia has the nation’s highest plaintiff success rate, at 87 percent, mostly due to Newport News’ unusual maritime status.

The “Silver situation” argument tries to underscore what some are dubbing an “iron triangle,” where the three corners are powerful (usually Democratic) legislators, wealthy plaintiffs lawyers who finance campaigns, and plaintiff-friendly judges, often appointed and supported by those same lawmakers.

Forbes explained the NYC case: “Federal prosecutors unsealed a criminal complaint against New York Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver, detailing long-rumored allegations about how a prominent asbestos law firm steered millions of dollars to the powerful politician in exchange for client referrals from a doctor, who in turn is accused of accepting favors from Silver.”

The NYT also noted that “a 35-page complaint by the U.S. Attorney’s Office in New York accuses Silver of accepting more than $5.3 million in payments from Weitz & Luxenberg, a New York law firm that specializes in asbestos lawsuits.” (The firm has not faced any charges, and it’s interesting that plenty of attorneys at the Perrin Conference, from both sides of the debate, argued that often-hefty referral fees are a routine industry practice. There were also jokes about the “no work” aspect of referrals, sort of “if that’s illegal, lots of us are in trouble!”)

On the judicial front, the case made headlines when Justice Sherry Klein Heitler, the asbestos-caseload judge, came under fire for connections to Silver and for making decisions that benefited his law firm. Heitler, 70, was a chief administrative judge and also headed a special section called New York City Asbestos Litigation, or NYCAL, that manages rules for asbestos cases. She has reportedly retired.

Time will tell if the defense-side’s “iron triangle” analogy plays beyond the Five Boroughs, even if Speaker Silver’s case highlights tort-reform advocates’ talking points. Beyond an obvious link between plaintiff’s firms and Democratic political donations, it’s hard to see how a regionally significant plaintiff’s lawyer, like Newport News’ Robert Hatten, stands in for the national Weitz firm. Moreover, how appropriate is to try and paint the Hon. David F. Pugh, who often gets the Newport News asbestos cases, in the role of Judge Heitler?

One can safely assume that Hatten will not respond with a Silver-esque silence. The “watchlist” inclusion brought a blistering demand for an apology to the judiciary carried in the local daily paper.

To be fair, the Perrin Conference buzz about Silver and the “iron triangle” strategy came amid plenty of other cutting-edge (if less newsworthy) issues, like the ongoing discovery under way in a North Carolina bankruptcy case, rumors of high-profile lawyers fleeing some of the larger firms and increased connection between asbestos and lung cancers.

The cutting-edge summary judgement? For a civil lawsuit community often deemed the “longest running” in America, with decades of science and judicial decisions, it remains truly amazing that so very much seems to be unsettled.

(Courts Monitor research staff and West Coast edition editors contributed to this report.)