So This Is What Happens 'When Gay Guys See Other Gay Guys And Straight People Aren't Around'

Now we all know.

Brian Jordan Alvarez has made “What actually happens when gay guys see other gay guys and straight people aren’t around,” a short video satirizing the notion that having a certain sexual orientation is like having admittance into some secret club. A club that just happens to have some pretty hilarious modes of eye-contact.

Sure, Brian, go ahead and let the secret out.

H/T Tastefully Offensive

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19 One-Liners That Sum Up Parenthood Perfectly

Parenting is so many things to so many people — everyone’s experience is unique. Or, that’s what we’d like to think. When we look to Twitter, though, we find that parents have certain hilarious universal experiences. We’ve pulled together some of the best fill-in-the-blank responses to “Parenting is…” from around the Twittersphere. It’s difficult to sum up parenting in one sentence, but these tweeting parents do a pretty amazing job.

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10 Genius Ways To Use Coconut Oil Around The House

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(Photo Credit: Getty Images)

Coconut oil is the handy (and semi-healthy) household staple that serves some purpose in every room in your home. You can clean, season and polish items all around your house, or use it to create DIY versions of brand-name cleaning products. Prepare to go nuts, and use coconut oil to do a variety of chores below.

1. Take an indulgent coconut bath.
These luxurious, homemade white chocolate bath melts get their yummy scent from coconut oil and white cocoa butter. Package them for an inexpensive and thoughtful gift.
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(Photo Credit: Bit Square Blog)

2. Season a cast iron skillet.
You can use various kinds of oil to season a new skillet. Cooks swear by food-grade coconut oil because, as opposed to shortening or lard, coconut oil doesn’t add fat to the pan.

3. Make a sweet-smelling bar soap.
You’ll get a “dense lather” from this fun-to-make body soap, which also turns out to be a great gift.
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4. Whip up some homemade laundry detergent.
Use grated leftover bar soap to make this coconut oil laundry detergent. It smells great and is less expensive than store-bought brands.
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5. Give your toothpaste a kick.
Coconut oil and a dash of Stevia sweetener make this homemade toothpaste utterly delicious. Plus, the baking soda naturally removes surface tooth stains.
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6. Polish leather shoes, bags and belts.
Yup, coconut oil works just as well as that messy shoe polish.

7. Banish shower scum.
Pass on shower cleaners filled with chemicals, and use coconut oil on a damp rag instead. Add vinegar or baking soda to give it a boost, too.
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8. Get sticky stuff out of your carpet… or hair.
Rub coconut oil onto sticky label residue or carpet gunk, and watch it lift. (P.S. This trick also solves the unfortunate gum-in-hair predicament.)

9. Polish wood furniture.
Perhaps the most popular use for coconut oil around the house is as a wood furniture polish. Mix it with lemon juice for an all-natural shine booster that costs much less (and smells better) than your average polish.
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10. Get busy in the bedroom.
Turns out coconut makes for a smooth, exotic-smelling massage oil. Talk about a staycation!

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Are You Short Selling Yourself?

I believe everyone has a story to tell. Many have several. Just as the average person dreams 4 or 6 times a night, I think an average person can spin 4 or 6 great stories about her life.

I attend many women’s networking events. Women seem to network more than men who usually go for drinks or sports outings while we gals attend wine and food events and empowerment programs.

I’m frequently dismayed at how some women are reluctant to state who they are, promote what they do or present themselves with confidence. Some neglect to present themselves at all and just start talking away, missing the opportunity to make a great impression.

People may not listen to the end of what you have to say. You need to grab their attention from the start.

A few examples I’ve heard that don’t make much of an impact:

“I’m just a stay-at-home mom. I don’t have a career right now”

“I’m used to work full time in XYZ industry, but now I’m looking for a new opportunity.”

“I’m trying to start a new business venture.”

“I’m a vice president at XYZ company.”

One of my areas of expertise is to help people pitch, package and present who they are and what they do effectively.

Here are five tips to present yourself. They are not just for women. Men stumble over their words as well.

1. Believe that you are always someone special and what you do matters. State it with confidence. You are never “just” anything. And never make excuses for leaving a career to be a full time mother. It’s important work. Give yourself credit.

2. If you are going in a new direction, use your words to help open doors. Examples: “I am transitioning from the corporate life to pursue work with a worthy not-for-profit. I am looking at various organizations now.” or “After two decades working in public relations, I now train small business owners how to manage own their PR.”

3. Leave out the word “trying.” Be clear about your intentions even if you are just starting up or out. You never know if you are meeting a potential customer, collaborator or employer. Examples: “I’ve started a service to provide virtual assistance for business executives.” “I’m turning my passion for creating one of a kind collages into a greeting card business.” Give your words a call to action.

4. Your title does not define what you do nearly as well as kind of work you do. For example, rather than introducing yourself as a vice president of marketing at a big name toy company, say: “I work at (Company Name) and market educational toys for children with learning disabilities to help them develop essential learning skills.” Give your work a meaningful description.

5. Show impact. It’s not only what you do but how it helps others. Examples: “I am a certified health coach who helps busy women make healthier lifestyle choices” (vs. “I am a health coach”). or “I help women make informed choices about their financial management and investments” (vs. “I am a financial adviser”).

Here’s a tip: Buy a small journal. Write five different paragraphs about who you are, what you do now and what you intend to do. Write 1-2 sentences introducing yourself for each one. Then practice saying it until it comes naturally.

Choose your words carefully. Avoid short selling who you are but try not to be long winded. Words are powerful tools to build relationships, create messages, sell yourself and make an impact.

You only have one chance to make a first impression. Make it a lasting one.

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Jon Stewart Compares CNN's Lack Of Baltimore Coverage To 'Masturbating In The Street'

As demonstrators took to the streets of Baltimore to protest police brutality on Saturday night, CNN largely stuck with its coverage of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. As Jon Stewart pointed out on Monday night’s “Daily Show,” it got pretty awkward.

During a discussion of the celebrity red carpet arrivals, one CNN host noted that many people on social media were asking for coverage of the unrest.

“This is what people want to hear about, this is what people are talking about,” one host said.

“Yeah, it’s important,” another host agreed, but then quickly added: “I do want to get to the red carpet.”

That led Stewart to make a memorable analogy.

“It’s one thing to say, ‘Oh, that’s terrible. We should be doing that,’ and then go do it,” Stewart said. “But to say it’s terrible, we should do it, and not do it, it’s sort of like standing in the middle of the street going, ‘Oh, people are saying I shouldn’t be masturbating in the street, but … you know … my balls aren’t going to release themselves.”

Stewart even played a clip of one of the network’s commentators suggesting people could find the latest information on Baltimore elsewhere.

After mimicking a head explosion, Stewart responded: “To be clear, a guy on CNN just said ‘Hey, if people are looking for news, I’m sure they can find it somewhere.’ It would be like Google going ‘What’s your question? I don’t know, just look it up yourself, I’m busy.'”

See his full takedown of CNN in the clip above.

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Why You Need to Know Your Net Worth

First, you may be wondering what is net worth in the first place?

Net worth is a simple calculation. You add up all your assets ( what you own), then subtract what you owe ( your debts and liabilities). The number left over is your net worth.

Assets – Liabilities = Net Worth

To me, net worth is equivalent to taking your blood pressure. It gives a reading that will tell us how healthy you are financially. I calculate if for every financial plan I’ve ever created. I love to compare these net worth snapshots over time. It really helps the client see their progress for wealth creation or preservation.

Here’s why it’s an important number to calculate and to know:

First, it tells you where you stand financially. It’s a measurement. A benchmark if you will. If your net worth is very low or negative then you probably haven’t been a good saver. Or, you’ve just started out and have very little assets and perhaps some student debt. Either way it is a progress meter. If your net worth is very high, then it means you’ve saved and limited your spending.

Second, it will reveal if you are racking up too much debt. When you calculate your liabilities you’ll clearly see if this reduces your net worth. In some cases it can be significant. It can even give you a negative number. Then you know you have a debt problem that needs to be worked on and reduced.

Third, it can reveal if you have too much of any one asset. Such as real estate or cash. When you add up all your assets and a large percentage is in for example large cap stocks, real estate or a hoard of cash then that’s a signal you’re not as diversified as you thought. Those are just examples of assets but you get the idea.

Calculating your net worth is as simple as whipping out a notepad and a pen. You don’t need a sophisticated piece of software for the job.

If your situation is fairly complex, then you may want to create your financial plan and have a pro get to work for you. It will give you and your advisor a starting point for change…or congratualtions.

If you liked the article, you can get my weekly money mumblings by subscribing right here for free. I’ll have my virtual paperboy toss one in your inbox every Friday.

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Expats Share Their Top 20 Tips for Moving Abroad

By: Nadia Imafidon

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Credit: Shutterstock.com

There’s nothing more exciting than packing up your life and buying a one-way ticket to a foreign land, right? OK, maybe crazy is the better word. But whether you’ve joined the Peace Corps, transferred to Jakarta, or just decided to backpack around Europe and “settle down” on the DL, one thing’s for certain: the life of an expat, while adventurous and liberating, can be incredibly stressful.

In an effort to help aspiring — and possibly anxious — globetrotters, we chatted with a bunch of expats around the world to find out exactly what they wish they’d known before making the big move.

More: 10 Secrets the Airlines Don’t Want You to Know

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Credit: Flickr/Parimal Satyal

Pack light
Even if you’re leaving for a two-year commitment abroad, you don’t need two years’ worth of stuff. Stores do exist outside of the US. Also, living in a non-Western country might change your feelings about material goods, and help you reprioritize what’s important in life. Then again, it may also make you long for every pair of Jordans you’ve ever owned.

Give yourself time to settle in
Integration is not going to happen overnight. Take at least three months to observe the culture around you and settle in. Most importantly, say yes to things you may not necessarily be inclined to, especially if you don’t have any friends. Like moving to a new city in the US, or starting a new job, it takes time. Be patient. Also, maybe download a bunch of movies before you go?

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Credit: Flickr/McKay Savage

Be open to new things
Can’t say this enough: be ready to experience new foods, people, and customs. That’s the ultimate reason you’re moving abroad, right? Oh, you’re running from the law? Never mind, then.

But don’t feel like you have to immerse completely
As in, like, don’t feel obligated to jump into a weird sex party just because you’re lonely and nobody back home will answer your Skype calls. (Unless you’re already into weird sex parties.) The day-in, day-out challenges of living in a different country, dealing with different cultural norms, and speaking a difficult language will wear you down. So, be prepared. But there’s a big difference between being willing to try a new experience and being the one American dude who’s waaaaay too into Japanese drumming. Don’t lose yourself in the name of integrating, but be open to the differences a host culture can offer.

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Credit: Flickr/BenSpark

Know that learning the language WILL be hard
Unless it’s Spanish and you took it in college, ’cause then it’ll probably be easy. But if not, make an effort to at least learn the basics immediately; people will be a lot friendlier if you show an interest in their native tongue, and it will help ease everyday interactions. And remember, every country has its own sayings and slang — there’s bound to be some miscommunication, even if you’ve spoken the language for a long time.

Making local friends changes the whole game
You’re not moving abroad to hang out with Americans. Befriend the locals. They will help you find a place to live, a job, a ride when you still can’t afford a car, etc. Not to mention, help you gain access to things foreigners wouldn’t necessarily be able to.

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Credit: Flickr/Peter

Prepare to laugh at yourself. A lot.
This is key. Insane things happen, and a lot of it you may never understand. True story: while trying to say “pineapple” to a coworker, you might instead say “I love your mom.” Everyone will laugh, and you should too. Let it go and grow. Also, don’t try to have relations with your coworker’s mom; it’s a bad idea.

Find out what your new country doesn’t have
Can you fill your prescriptions abroad? What about your favorite food? Sometimes a jar of peanut butter helps after a hard day of culture shock, but guess what? Nobody eats peanut butter! Think ahead about what you might miss a lot and make sure, if you have to have it (like those meds), it can be gotten.

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Credit: Flickr/dawolf-

Research your new home before arriving
Sounds like a no-brainer but know a little bit about the culture, the history, the geography, and important public figures of the country you’re moving to. If you can speak intelligently to your new friends, neighbors, and coworkers about their nation (even if it’s in a horrible accent), they’ll be much more welcoming and hopefully, depending on the country, less anti-American.

If you only visit big cities, you’re gonna miss out
For example, if you’re in Spain, you’re going to see Madrid. That’s obvious. But don’t forget to travel up the coast and hit the smaller towns in between, as well. You can learn so much more about a country when you interact with people who don’t meet tourists very often, especially if you speak the language.

There are still 10 more things you need to know about moving abroad, only at Thrillist.com!

More from Thrillist:

The 9 Most European Cities Not in Europe

How to Quit Your Job to Travel the World

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Vegetarian Tasting Menus in NYC: The Veggie 7 Series

The tasting menu is a prominent part of the New York dining scene, with chefs using it as an opportunity to stage elaborate culinary performances, giving you an insight into their creative minds and the ideas that they’re playing with.

Over the past decade, many restaurants and chefs have looked to broaden their reach by offering vegetarian and vegan tasting menus, with the added benefit of highlighting local and seasonal produce. We’ve put together a selection of 7 vegetarian tasting menus in New York that we love, some of which are a permanent feature, and others requiring just a little bit of advance notice.

1.    Semilla

Semilla is part of the vegetable-forward trend, where their 10 course-tasting menu relegates meat and fish (when they are used) to the role of an accent or garnish, but of course, you can go without either. The Williamsburg restaurant trades the dining room for an 18-seater chef’s counter with a direct view of the kitchen, making the experience a lot more casual and relaxed. Chef Jose Ramirez-Ruiz, along with his partner and pastry chef Pamela Yung, serve up innovative dishes like a cabbage ‘sandwich’ (hint: it doesn’t actually use bread), sunchoke chawanmushi and fermented oat porridge with beets and brown butter for dessert. Chef Yung also makes fantastic sourdough bread, which alone is worth the trip!

2.    Eleven Madison Park

If you’re looking for something a little more formal, then you can try Eleven Madison Park, where the art deco-inspired interiors and imposing floor-to-ceiling windows bring to mind a sort of dining cathedral. The tasting menu is a three hour-plus experience, where some recent vegetarian highlights included a grain-free celery root risotto with a delectable black truffle sauce, turnips prepared in four different ways served in a turnip broth, and a twist on some classic New York dishes, including the Waldorf Salad. Be prepared to put aside a full afternoon or evening for a meal at this three Michelin star restaurant, which doesn’t include the food coma you may slip into afterwards!

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Photo by star5112, under CC BY-SA 2.0

3.    Per Se

Serving up a 9 course tasting menu that’s often been described as ‘flawless’, Per Se is acclaimed chef Thomas Keller’s love letter to classical French cooking, with a modern American twist. If you take the veggie route, you may have a chance to sample dishes such as chilled Hass avocado soup, ratatouille or bean cassoulet; the menu is changed daily to make use of the freshest ingredients available. And nobody can resist Per Se’s take on coffee and donuts, which finishes off the meal. Add to that an extensive wine collection boasting over 2,000 bottles, and it’s easy to see why Per Se is considered to be one of New York’s best restaurants.

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Photo by kowarski, under CC BY 2.0

4.    Dovetail

Monday nights are meatless at Dovetail, on Manhattan’s Upper West Side, with a special vegetarian menu for spring and summer. The tasting is comparatively short, at only four courses, with each of the first three giving you a choice of dishes to select from. You could, for example, find yourself deciding between the barbecue parsnip rib or the braising greens lasagna.

Executive Chef John Fraser, who’s honed his skills under Thomas Keller, likes to get playful with his food, sometimes choosing an enigmatic name like ‘Fuji Apples’ that will leave you guessing at the exact preparation until it arrives at your table.

5.    Blue Hill at Stone Barns

Yes, we know, Westchester is outside of the five boroughs, but Blue Hill at Stone Barns is too good to be left off this list, and the New York City outlet just doesn’t compare. It’s about a 45-minute drive from the city, but is completely worth the trek!

The restaurant at Stone Barns is a sprawling farmhouse with an elegant dining room inside, and most of the ingredients are grown right next door! The menu is adapted regularly to reflect the season’s harvest. There are some frequently used elements, such as mini beet sliders, vegetable ‘steaks’ and an amuse bouche that’s a ‘fence’ made of organic vegetables from the garden. But chances are, you will have a different experience on every visit.

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Beet burgers by roboppy, under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

6.    Kajitsu

Translated from Japanese as ‘fine day’ or ‘day of celebration’, Kajitsu aims to turn every visit into a special occasion for its diners. The restaurant follows the ‘shojin’ philosophy of cuisine, which is practiced by Buddhist monks who don’t eat meat or fish. Choose from the vegan-friendly 4-course ‘kaze’ or 8-course ‘hana’ menu, in which Executive Chef Hiroki Odo puts a contemporary Japanese twist on seasonal New York fruits and vegetables, finding creative uses for mountain yam, daikon and mushrooms. Although Kajitsu has lost a Michelin star recently, it’s still one of the finest destinations for Asian vegan cuisine in NYC.

7.    Del Posto

If you’re seeking out vegan or gluten-free dining options, you’ll get both in abundance at Del Posto. Executive Chef Mark Ladner is hoping to make modern Italian cuisine more accessible to everyone with some innovative variations on the classics. As of 2013, all the pastas have a gluten-free option, including favorites such as luna piena, a circular ravioli with cheese and truffle butter, and pumpkin cappelacci, filled with rich pumpkin puree. Del Posto also appeals to the sweet-toothed among us by presenting a selection of indulgent, creamy desserts that don’t involve even a drop of milk!

More from VeggieBuzz.com:

You wont escape the snow at Eleven Madison Park
Semilla Brooklyn | Another seed in the Vegetable Forward Trend
The ABC NYC Series

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I Am Pro-abortion, Not Just Pro-choice: 10 Reasons Why We Must Support The Procedure And The Choice – Salon.com

I believe that abortion care is a positive social good — and I think it’s time people said so

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Make Your Dentist Proud With These Awesome Toothbrush Deals

Today only, Amazon’s offering great prices on gear to keep your teeth in top shape between dentist cleanings.

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