Playing Out The Not-So-Greatful-Dead: The Most Popular Tunes For Boomer Funerals

Monty Python’s “Always Look On The Bright Side of Life” recently beat out Frank Sinatra’s “My Way” as the song most people choose to have played at their funerals. I’m guessing that we Boomers can take credit for this. Inspired, I asked my Facebook pals to help me put together a playlist. “What song would YOU like to check out to?” I asked.

The first suggestion? “Don’t Fear The Reaper.”

Quickly followed by:

“Only The Good Die Young.”

“Another One Bites The Dust.”

“You Can’t Always Get What You Want”

“Is That All There Is?”

After that, the suggestions came fast and furious:

“I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For.”

“Knock Knock Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door.”

“The End” by the Doors.

“You’re Going To Miss Me When I’m Gone.”

Some folks seemed to be OK with kicking the bucket:

“Who Wants To Live Forever?”

“It’s The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine).”

“Up, Up and Away!”

“The Best Is Yet To Come.”

Others were less eager to embrace the Sweet Hereafter, choosing songs like:

“Stayin’ Alive”

“Please Don’t Bury Me” by John Prine.

Pearl Jam’s “Just Breathe.”

Queen’s “Don’t Stop Me Now.”

Some wanted to take a last look back:

“In My Life.”

“Days” by the Kinks.

“What A Long Strange Trip It’s Been.”

And of course, there were the jokers:

“I plan to be cremated, so my obvious choice is “Light My Fire.” Or, if I can find a leisure suit, “Disco Inferno.”

“I’ll be cremated, too — I’m going with Elvis Presley’s “Burning Love.”

“Can we choose music for other people’s funerals? Because there are several for whom I’d choose ‘Dancin’ In The Streets.'”

“The Hokey Pokey!” Because that’s what it’s all about.

And the hits just kept on coming:

“Hello, Goodbye.”

“Stairway to Heaven!”

“Highway to Hell!”

“Sympathy for the Devil.”

“Dust in the Wind.”

Some friends, I learned, had actually given this topic serious thought:

“I’v already asked for Jimmy Buffet’s ‘It’s Been A Lovely Cruise.”

“At my funeral? ‘In My Life.’ The Sean Connery cover. Seriously.”

“‘Queen of the Slipstream’ by Van Morrison will play at mine.”

“My children have been instructed to play “‘Your Mother Should Know.'”

“I’m going with “So Long, It’s Been Good To Know You.”

As for me? I plan to live to 100, after which you can play me out to “Instant Karma.” Why? Because we all shine on like the moon and the stars and the sun.

And when I get to Heaven, I expect John Lennon to be there to greet me with “Good choice!”

(Roz Warren is the author of Our Bodies, Our Shelves: A Collection of Library Humor.)

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The Secret to the Best Ever French Onion Dip

By Matt Duckor, Epicurious

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Photo: Chelsea Kyle

The last thing I expected Cortney Burns to make was the best French Onion dip I’ve ever had.

A bit of background: Burns is one half of the duo behind San Francisco’s Bar Tartine. Along with co-chef Nick Balla, the pair has garnered all sorts of critical acclaim for melding the food of Balla’s Hungarian ancestry with ingredients and techniques from a mishmash of other cultures, from Asia to Scandinavia. She was in New York recently and stopped by the Epicurious Test Kitchen to do a little cooking from her and Balla’s new book, Bar Tartine: Techniques & Recipes.

“I don’t know the last time I’ve made French Onion dip,” says Burns. “But it’s the first thing that popped into my head when we were talking.”

What we’d been talking about is the many flavored powders Bar Tartine delves into–stuff like making powders out of yogurt, burnt bread, and rice. It’s the kind of stuff a high-end restaurant like Bar Tartine is built upon, but not something home cooks get into very often. But when we were talking, Burns suggested garlic and onion powder. Which, truthfully, I avoid. While it can be a potent flavor bomb, the store-bought stuff is doctored up with preservatives, extra salt, and artificial additives. Burns assured me that trying homemade garlic and onion powders would convert me: “They’re just so concentrated in flavor, a little bit sweet, and incredibly versatile–you can fold them into breads, use them in marinades, or just about anything else.”

And, as it turns out, they make for one hell of a dip.

Luckily, making your own garlic and onion powders is a heck of a lot easier than it sounds. Sure, you could use a dehydrator to do it, but there’s an easier way–one with zero special equipment necessary. All you need is a gas oven. Don’t turn it on, don’t even look at it–the warmth of your oven’s pilot light is enough to do the trick. The key to killer at-home powders is doing absolutely nothing.

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Photo: Chelsea Kyle

Start by prepping the green onions and garlic. For the green onions, trim the roots and halve the onions lengthwise from the white bottom all the way to the green top. Cut crosswise into 1-inch pieces and cook in a cast iron skillet over high heat until charred and blackened, about 10 minutes. For the garlic, peel the cloves, remove the hard stem end, and cut into very thin slices.

From there, the process is the same for either powder: Place the ingredients on a sheet tray lined with parchment paper and leave it in a gas oven overnight. After 12 hours, remove the tray from the oven and grind the large dried pieces in a food processor to coarse flakes. Move the flakes back to a parchment-lined sheet tray and place in the oven for 8 more hours, until all the moisture is dried out. Process the results in a spice grinder and pass the powder through a fine mesh sieve.

That’s it. Active time where you’re actually doing something? Oh, maybe 15 minutes.

Don’t have a gas oven? No problem, you’ve still got options. Of course, there’s always a food dehydrator (set it to 125°F and follow the same time guidelines above). Following the same process with an electric oven set to its lowest setting (ideally below 170 °F) and the door ajar works well too.

With the super-concentrated flavor of garlic and charred green onions at your finger tips, assembling the best ever French onion dip is a breeze. Burns turns to rich, creamy ricotta cheese over the more conventional mayo for a dip that packs a lighter mouthfeel. Combine 1 1/2 cups high-quality ricotta cheese and sour cream with 1/4 cup chopped fresh chives, 1 cup caramelized onions, 2 tbsp charred green onion powder, 2 tbsp garlic powder, and 2 tbsp sweet paprika. Fold with a rubber spatula until fully incorporated.

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Photo: Chelsea Kyle

The resulting dip tastes nothing like the stuff you had growing up as a kid. It’s rich, creamy, slightly sweet, a little bit salty, and full of multi-layered, big flavors. And it’s all because we put a few ingredients in an oven. “It’s one of those simple things that sounds complicated at first,” explains Burns, “but then you do it and you realize, oh wait, this is the easiest thing ever.”

The hardest thing ever? Putting down the bowl.

More from Epicurious:
20 Must-Try Ways to Pair Items You Already Have In Your Pantry

The 57 Best Pieces of Cooking Advice of All Time

12 Lightning-Fast Chicken Dinners You Can Make RIGHT NOW

The Must-Read Boiling Water Recipe with 908 Comments

10 Recipes From A Chocoholic’s Dreams

Addictive, Amazing 22-Minute Meals to Shake Up Your Weeknight Dinner

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14 Delightful Kids Quotes Illustrated In The Most Charming Way

Everyone knows that kids say the darndest things, and now their most bizarre and heartwarming quotes can be forever immortalized by a Hallmark artist.

Retired Hallmark illustrator Eric Disney has teamed up with LittleHoots, an app that lets on-the-go parents type out and save their children’s funniest, strangest and sweetest quotes. Sifting through the priceless quotes archived on the app, the artist selects the phrases that most inspire him and illustrates them with adorable custom designs.

Once a design is complete, LittleHoots posts it to Facebook, tags the family behind the quote and then gives them the artwork for free.

littlehoots

“I think what’s truly unique about these pieces is the surprise factor,” LittleHoots creator Lacey Ellis told The Huffington Post. “Prints are available for people to purchase, but the real fun is surprising the unsuspecting parents,” she said.

Scroll down for a look at Eric Disney’s marvelous kid quote designs.

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Celebrating 50 Years of Head Start

Fifty years ago today, Head Start was launched across the nation. At the announcement in the White House Rose Garden, President Johnson called it “one of the most constructive, and one of the most sensible, and also one of the most exciting programs that this Nation has ever undertaken.”

A few years later, a class was established in my home town of Hinton, West Virginia.

In a rural town like Hinton, Head Start was one of the only early educational opportunities available. It meant a lot to the families there and still does today. I know, because it meant a lot to my family.

That’s right; I’m a Head Start kid.

In that little classroom, I hatched chickens, listened to stories, and made lifelong friends. Thanks to Head Start, and an excellent teacher, Mrs. Rita Pack, I learned to love learning, and that passion has stayed with me my entire life.

I did get a head start, and that’s a foundation all children should have.

Head Start was founded on the principles that education is the door to opportunity, and that everyone, no matter their background, deserves a shot at a productive life.

Since it was founded in the summer of 1965, Head Start, along with Early Head Start, has served more than 32 million children. This year alone, those programs will help more than 1 million children prepare for school and build a foundation for a healthier, happier life.

But this work doesn’t just help children; it strengthens families and our entire community.

Parents are powerful partners, and as the original multi-generation program, Head Start helps them create and implement family strategies and supports their ability to work.

It also has a long history of supporting the field of early learning. Using the best and latest developmental science and research, Head Start provides guidance on best-practices and promotes excellence in teaching.

Stronger students, families, and teachers have an impact on all of us. A Rand research brief found that high quality early childhood interventions generate a return to society ranging from $1.80 to $17.07 for each dollar spent.

And Head Start continues to grow and improve.

We recently awarded the last of the $500 million Congress budgeted for new Early Head Start-Child Care Partnership grants, adding up to 275 new grants. Those grants will serve over 30,000 new Early Head Start children.

In the coming month, we will issue the revised Head Start Performance Standards for public comment. These standards are rooted in evidence-based research and will improve classroom quality and program transparency. We also think they will make it a little easier to manage programs by eliminating out-of-date requirements.

As we look to the next 50 years and beyond, we can see that the need for Head Start is greater than ever.

Today, more than 16 million children in the United States – 22 percent of all children – live in families with incomes below the federal poverty level. And that includes a disproportionate number of children of color: nearly 40 percent of black children and 35 percent of Hispanic children. With the struggles that families in poverty face, less than half of these children go to school prepared with the skills they need to be ready to learn and they are 10 times as likely to drop out of high school.

In light of these facts, and as we celebrate this historic milestone, now is the time to rededicate ourselves to ensuring all children have the resources they need and deserve.

Early education is a top priority for this administration. That’s why President Obama’s budget requests over $10 billion to provide more children with more intensive high-quality Head Start services. Unfortunately, the Republican budget resolution would cut funding, closing off access to these important services for tens of thousands of children. We believe that ensuring America’s children have a strong foundation no matter where they come from is essential to our nation’s future, and we will continue to push for services that give children opportunities for success.

President Kennedy said, “Children are the world’s most valuable resource and its best hope for the future.” There is no better investment we can make than investing in the minds of our children, and with Head Start and Early Head Start, we know our returns will be great.

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Presidential Waivers, Child Soldiers, and an American-Made Army in Africa

The Kids Aren’t All Right

Cross-posted with TomDispatch.com

MALAKAL, South Sudan — I didn’t really think he was going to shoot me.  There was no anger in his eyes.  His finger may not have been anywhere near the trigger.  He didn’t draw a bead on me.  Still, he was a boy and he was holding an AK-47 and it was pointed in my direction. 

It was unnerving.

I don’t know how old he was.  I’d say 16, though maybe he was 18 or 19.  But there were a few soldiers nearby who looked even younger — no more than 15.

When I was their age, I wasn’t trusted to drive, vote, drink, get married, gamble in a casino, serve on a jury, rent a car, or buy a ticket to an R-rated movie.  It was mandatory for me to be in school.  The law decreed just how many hours I could work and prohibited my employment in jobs deemed too dangerous for kids — like operating mixing machines in bakeries or repairing elevators.  No one, I can say with some certainty, would have thought it a good idea to put an automatic weapon in my hands.  But someone thought it was acceptable for them.  A lot of someones actually.  Their government — the government of South Sudan — apparently thought so.  And so did mine, the government of the United States. 

Photo Bomb

There was a reason that boy pointed his weapon my way.  A lot of them, in fact.  In the most immediate sense, I brought it upon myself.  I was doing something I knew could get me in trouble, but I just couldn’t help myself. 

I tried to take a picture.  Okay, I took a picture.  More than one.

Click here to see a larger version

Malakal airfield, July 2014.

Public photography is frequently frowned upon in South Sudan.  Take pictures of the wrong thing and the authorities might force you to delete the images, or confiscate your camera, or maybe worse.

The incident in question took place during last year’s rainy season on the outskirts of sodden Malakal, a war-ravaged town 320 miles north of the capital, Juba.  The airport, near the banks of the White Nile, had devolved into an airstrip.  Nobody seemed to use its vintage blue and white terminal building anymore.  Instead, you drove past cold-eyed Rwandan peacekeepers, United Nations troop trucks, and an armored personnel carrier or two, right up to the tarmac.

That’s where I was when a fairly big, nondescript white plane arrived.  That in itself was hardly remarkable.  It’s de rigueur for Malakal.  If it isn’t a World Food Program flight, then it’s a big-bellied plane hauling in supplies for some non-governmental organization or a United Nations plane like the one that brought me there and that I was waiting for to whisk me away.

This nondescript white plane, however, was different from the others.  When the Canadair CRJ-100, with Cemairwritten across its tail, taxied up and its door opened, it wasn’t your typical array of airline passengers who sallied down the gangway.  At least not at first.  It was a large group of young men in camouflage uniforms carrying assault rifles and machine guns.  And they were met on the runway by scores of similarly attired, similarly armed young men who had arrived in a convoy just minutes earlier. 

I’d never seen anything like it, so I pulled out my phone and tried to surreptitiously take a few photos.  Not surreptitiously enough, though.  A commander spotted me, got angry, and headed my way, waving his finger “no.”  It was then that this boy with the AK-47, who had arrived in the convoy, turned toward me — following the officer’s gaze — and the rifle in his arms turned with him, and I stepped lively to put the commander between me and him, while quickly shoving my phone in my pocket and apologizing again and again.

Click here to see a larger version

Malakal airfield, July 2014.

Approximately 13,000 children have been recruited into armed groups in South Sudan, according to the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF).  In addition, about 400,000 youngsters have been forced out of school due to the civil war that has been flaring and simmering there for almost a year and a half.  How so many children came to be affected by the conflict and why so many of them find themselves serving in the national army, the main rebel force, and other militias needs to be explained.  It has much to do with civil wars that started in the 1950s and lasted for the better part of five decades, pitting rebels in the south against the government in the north of what was then a single country: Sudan. 

Other factors include the 2005 peace deal that led to an independent South Sudan and transformed a guerrilla force into a national military, the Sudan People’s Liberation Army or SPLA; a rural culture in which cows are king because they are currency and young boys are armed to defend against cattle raids, as well as to conduct them; and an armed grudge match between political rivals representing different tribal groups in South Sudan that began in December 2013.  Add all of this together and any tangible recent progress toward ridding South Sudan of the scourge of child soldiers has been obliterated. 

Oh yes, and into that mix you would also have to factor the United States, a country that, as then U.S. Senator, now Secretary of State John Kerry put it, helped “midwife” South Sudan into existence.

America’s African Army

In 1996, the United States began funneling military equipment through nearby Ethiopia, Eritrea, and Uganda to rebels in southern Sudan as they battled for independence.  A decade later, after the civil war ended in a peace deal, Washington officially began offering military “assistance” to the SPLA, according to State Department documents.  At that point, without fanfare and far from the prying eyes of the press, the U.S. launched a concerted campaign to transform the SPLA from a guerrilla force into a professional army. 

When I recently asked about the scope of this training, Rodney Ford, the State Department’s Bureau of African Affairs spokesperson, told me: “The U.S. government began a comprehensive defense professionalization program which started in [fiscal year] 2006 [and] continued after the referendum and independence of South Sudan until December 2013.  This assistance included infrastructure, vehicles, human rights training, logistics, administration, medical, military justice, finance, and English language training among an array of other military subjects.  The U.S. government, for example, conducted a comprehensive medical program with the South Sudanese military which entailed procuring mobile field hospitals, building clinics, training nurses and improving the military’s medical infrastructure.”

Ford also emphasized that no “lethal equipment” was provided and noted that the lessons were designed to “give soldiers the tools and skills that would benefit the civilian population.”  It sounded almost like they were building a South Sudanese Peace Corps. 

In reality, there was more to it.  U.S. support was not strictly a kumbaya effort of medical clinics and human rights instruction.  It included the training and equipping of the elite presidential guard; the construction of a new SPLA headquarters in Juba; the renovation of a training center at the SPLA Command and Staff College in Malou, a town north of the capital; and the construction of the headquarters of two SPLA divisions in the towns of Mapel and Duar.  Included as well were training programs for general officers and senior instructors; the deployment of a “training advisory team” to guide the overhaul of intelligence, communications, and other key functions; the employment of Kenyan and later Ethiopian instructors to teach basic military skills to SPLA recruits; the provision of secure voice and data communications to SPLA general headquarters; the development of riverine forces and up to 16 tactical watercraft; military police instruction; the training of commando forces by Ethiopian troops; and the establishment of a noncommissioned officers academy at Mapel with training from private contractors and later U.S. military personnel.  And according to a comprehensive report focusing on the years 2006-2010 by Richard Rands for the Small Arms Survey at the Graduate Institute of International and Development Studies in Geneva, this list only encompasses part of Washington’s efforts. 

During the early 2000s, as thousands of refugee “Lost Boys” who had fled the civil war in southern Sudan began to be resettled in cities across the United States, their brothers and sisters back home continued to suffer as civilians or as child combatants.  Between 2001 and 2006, however, as international pressure mounted and the civil war waned, some 20,000 child soldiers were also reportedly demobilized by the SPLA, although thousands remained in the force for a variety of reasons, including an extreme lack of other opportunities. 

By 2010, when the SPLA pledged to demobilize all of its child soldiers by the end of the year, there were an estimated 900 children still serving in the force.  The next year, under terms of the agreement that ended the civil war, the people of southern Sudan voted for their independence.  Six months later, on July 9th, South Sudan became the world’s newest nation, prompting a strong statement of support from President Barack Obama: “I am confident that the bonds of friendship between South Sudan and the United States will only deepen in the years to come.  As Southern Sudanese undertake the hard work of building their new country, the United States pledges our partnership as they seek the security, development, and responsive governance that can fulfill their aspirations and respect their human rights.”

While child soldiers, in fact, remained in the SPLA, the U.S. nonetheless engaged in a years-long effort to pour billions of dollars in humanitarian aid, as well as hundreds of millions of dollars of military and security assistance, into South Sudan.  Here’s the catch in all this: the Child Soldiers Prevention Act (CSPA), passed by Congress in 2008 and enacted in 2010, prohibits the United States from providing military assistance to governments using child soldiers.  This means that the Obama administration should have been barred from providing South Sudan with military assistance in 2011.  The government, however, relied on a technicality to gain an exemption — claiming the list of barred countries was created before the new nation formally came into existence.

Washington’s support for the SPLA continued even as militia groups with children under arms were folded into the force.  The U.S. flung open the doors of advanced U.S. military schools, training centers, colleges, and universities to SPLA personnel.  In 2010 and 2011, for example, U.S. taxpayers footed the bill for some of them to attend U.S. military armor, artillery, intelligence, and infantry schools; in 2012 and 2013, it was the National Defense University, the U.S. Army’s Command and General Staff College, the Marine Corps Combat Service Support School, and the Naval Post Graduate School in Monterey, California, among other institutions. 

According to the State Department’s 2013 Congressional Budget Justification, tens of millions of dollars were also earmarked for “refurbishment, operations, and maintenance of training centers and divisional headquarters; strategic and operational advisory assistance; unit and individual professional training; and communications and other non-lethal equipment for the military.”  All of it, according to official State Department documents, was designed to promote “a military that is professionally trained and led, ethically balanced, aware of moral imperatives, and able to contribute positively to national and South-South reconciliation.” 

At the same time it was attempting to transform the SPLA into a national army, the U.S. military began operating from an outpost in South Sudan’s hinterlands.  At a Combined Operations Fusion Center in Nzara, a small contingent of U.S. Special Operations forces worked with South Sudanese military intelligence as part of Observant Compass, an operation focused on degrading or destroying Joseph Kony’s murderous Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA).  Planes and helicopters, flown by private contractors, ferried U.S. troops in and out of the small camp.  It was also used by special ops personnel for training SPLA forces in everything from navigation skills to airmobile helicopter assaults and as a staging area for joint raids against the LRA in the Democratic Republic of Congo.  Until just weeks before the civil war broke out in South Sudan in 2013, U.S. special operators were conducting military assault drills at Nzara.

As the United States was pouring money and effort into building up the country’s armed forces, human rights groups repeatedly complained about its military’s use of children.  This isn’t to say that the Obama administration turned a blind eye to the practice.  It was, in fact, much worse than that. 

On September 28, 2012, for example, Assistant Secretary of State for African Affairs Johnnie Carson issued a strong statement against the use of children as combatants.  “Protecting and assisting children affected by armed conflict and preventing abuses against them is a priority for the United States,” he announced.  “We remain committed to ending the unlawful recruitment and use of child soldiers, including in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC).”  Carson went on to note that, adhering to provisions of the Child Soldiers Prevention Act, the U.S. would indeed withhold certain security assistance to the DRC (though not all of it). 

That same day, President Obama issued a statement of his own, waiving the application of the Child Soldiers Prevention Act with respect to several nations (as the act indeed allows a president to do). South Sudan was included on the grounds that such a decision was in “the national interest of the United States.”  It was not, as it happens, in the interest of the children of South Sudan, not at least according to a senior United Nations official who was not authorized to speak on the record.  The U.S. waiver “was doing more harm than good because there is absolutely no political will to solve the child soldier problem,” that official explained to me.  

In September 2013, Obama issued still another CSPA waiver — in the form of a memorandum to Secretary of State Kerry — keeping South Sudan eligible for U.S. military assistance and the licenses needed to buy military equipment, again citing national interest. 

By the end of the year, South Sudan had collapsed into civil war with many SPLA soldiers, especially those of the Dinka tribe, remaining loyal to President Salva Kiir’s government and others, predominantly of Nuer ethnicity, joining former Vice President Riek Machar’s rebel forces.  Members of the SPLA were almost immediately implicated in mass atrocities, including the killing of Nuer civilians.  That presidential guard, trained and equipped by the U.S. a few years earlier, was especially singled out for its brutal crimes. 

Machar’s opposition forces, including many Nuers formerly with the SPLA, carried out their own atrocities, including large-scale massacres of Dinka civilians and others.  The State Department soon issued a report, indignant over the fact that “since the outbreak of conflict on December 15, [2013] there have been reports of forced conscription by government forces and recruitment and use of child soldiers by both government and antigovernment forces” — precisely the behavior the president had told the secretary of state was in the American national interest just a few months earlier. 

The Kids Aren’t All Right

“We worked closely with the SPLA to make sure the elimination of child soldiers or children associated with the military was a high priority,” a State Department official explained to me in a recent email.  “Right before the outbreak of the most recent conflict the U.N. had stated that there were no more ‘child soldiers’ in the South Sudanese military though some still remained on SPLA barracks cooking and cleaning, etc.” 

That’s not quite how the United Nations actually put it.

Before the civil war erupted, “the United Nations verified the recruitment and use of 162 children, all boys and mostly between 14 and 17 years of age,” 99 of whom were with the SPLA, 35 with a militia allied to a commander named David Yau Yau, 25 associated with the Lou Nuer tribe, and three with South Sudan’s national police. “Children associated with SPLA were identified in military barracks, wearing SPLA uniforms as well as undergoing military training in conflict areas,” according to the Office of the Special Representative of the Secretary-General for Children and Armed Conflict.  “In addition, reports of the recruitment and use of 133 children were pending verification at the time of reporting.”

Since December 2013, the situation has become far worse.  “We have been deeply disappointed to see the progress South Sudan had achieved toward ending the unlawful recruitment and use of child soldiers since independence so gravely set back by the conflict that erupted in December,” U.S. National Security Council spokesman Ned Price told me last year.  “Both government-aligned and rebel forces have recruited and used child soldiers in the current conflict, and we call on both sides to end this practice.” 

By May 2014, UNICEF estimated that 9,000 children had been recruited into the armed forces of both sides in the civil war, despite the fact that under “both international and South Sudanese law, the forcible or voluntary recruitment of persons under the age of 18, whether as a member of a regular army or of an informal militia, is prohibited.”  Today, that number is estimated to have grown to 13,000.

About a year ago, Machar’s SPLA-In Opposition (SPLA-IO) pledged to end the recruitment of child soldiers.  In late June, according to the U.N., Kiir’s government agreed to “restart the implementation of the Action Plan signed in 2012 to end and prevent the recruitment and use of children by the Sudan People’s Liberation Army.” 

There’s little evidence, however, that this has translated into tangible effects on the ground on either side.  “Despite renewed promises by both government and opposition forces that they will stop using child soldiers, both sides continue to recruit and use children in combat,” said Daniel Bekele, Africa director at Human Rights Watch (HRW), earlier this year.  “In Malakal, government forces are even taking children from right outside the United Nations compound.”

A well-placed source within the United Nations offered a similar assessment.  “Even though the SPLA re-committed in June of last year, they haven’t released many kids — only a handful,” he explained.  “The SPLA aren’t releasing their kids and there doesn’t seem to be any incentive to do so.” 

Skye Wheeler, an expert on South Sudan at Human Rights Watch, agrees that the government hasn’t done much.  “The SPLA is entirely aware that at least two former militiamen who are now fighting with the government and who have both been integrated into the army are using and recruiting numerous child soldiers but have not made any significant steps towards punitive action,” she told me recently by email.  She added that she also knows of no significant efforts to curb the recruitment of children by Machar’s SPLA-IO. 

Last fall, U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations Samantha Power chaired a meeting of the U.N. Security Council on children and armed conflict in which she declared: “Perpetrators have to be held accountable. Groups that fail to change their behavior must be hit where it hurts.”  A State Department official who refused to be named for this piece was equally unequivocal when it came to South Sudan.  “Since the outbreak of the conflict, there have been no waivers issued,” he told me in late March, “and we have expressed our concerns about the recruitment of children by multiple parties in the current conflict.”  But months earlier — just weeks after Power’s pronouncement and nearly a year after the civil war in South Sudan began — President Obama had indeed issued another partial waiver allowing continued support for the country, despite the prohibitions of the Child Soldiers Prevention Act. 

When I asked about this discrepancy, the State Department backtracked, admitting that the president had “authorized a partial waiver of the application of the prohibition in section 404(a) of the CSPA with respect to South Sudan to allow for the provision of PKO assistance,” citing a provision of the act and referring to PKO, or “peacekeeping,” funding long used to train and equip the SPLA.  In this instance, the official insisted that “none of the funds relevant to this partial waiver have been used to provide any direct assistance to the SPLA.” 

Andy Burnett, a spokesperson from the Office of the Special Envoy to Sudan and South Sudan, then went further.  “Just to apologize, the wording on our response back [to you] was confusing,” he told me.  “We were speaking about waivers that had been done as in the past — related to capacity building and assistance for the SPLA.  This partial waiver was done with a more narrow intent.”

In fact, the way that waiver was issued did not sit well with some.  “We were disappointed that a partial waiver was put in place last year again without a clear and public statement by the [U.S. government] that this was purely to allow certain activities (support to IGAD monitors and anti-LRA activities) and that the government would not be receiving any significant military support until the abuses, including use and recruitment of child soldiers, are properly addressed,” HRW’s Skye Wheeler told me.  She was referring to the Intergovernmental Authority on Development’s Monitoring and Verification Mechanism for South Sudan, set up in January 2014 to support mediation of the current civil war. 

The State Department acknowledged the absence of such a declaration, but emphasized that the United States had expressed its “concern” about the issue to Kiir’s government.  Asked about South Sudan’s response to those concerns, Burnett foggily replied that there were “differences of opinion about the extent to which [recruitment of children by the SPLA] is happening; arguments that when it’s happening it’s done by the opposition or other armed groups that are outside of [SPLA] control.”  In other words, after years of copious aid, effort, and waivers, the U.S. can’t even get the government of South Sudan to acknowledge its wrongdoing when it comes to recruiting child fighters, let alone halt it.

Toy Guns, Real Guns, and National Interests

The war in South Sudan has been a nightmare for children.  UNICEF estimates that 600,000 have been affected by psychological distress, 235,000 are at risk of severe acute malnutrition this year, and 680 have been killed.  “Mothers are burying their children… the level of slaughter, of innocent victims, innocent civilians, is simply unacceptable by any standard whatsoever,” Secretary of State John Kerry recently told South Sudan’s Eye Radio in scolding remarks.  The leaders of South Sudan’s warring parties “Salva Kiir, the president, and Riek Machar… need to come to their senses,” he said. “They need to sign an agreement that’s real and they need to stop allowing the people to be the victims of their power struggle.”  On one thing Kerry was adamant: “We need to have accountability as this goes forward.”

But what about U.S. accountability? Does the United States, after years of waivers, bear a responsibility for helping to entrench South Sudan’s practice of using child soldiers?  “In and of itself, it could be perceived as sanctioning the practice, but in the day-to-day reality of engaging, we were a strong advocate for moving beyond the practices that had been historically taking place and removing any child soldiers within the SPLA,” says Andy Burnett.  “I’m not saying we deserve full credit,” he told me, even as he argued that the president’s waivers had led to real progress.  

Whatever progress might have been made before the civil war, as he readily admitted, was soon obliterated.  So was the U.S. training effort in South Sudan a failure?  After a wall of words about the difficulties involved in “creating an accountable and professional armed force” in the available time, Burnett took some responsibility, even if he carefully extended the blame to cover America’s partners in the effort.  “Yes, that the international effort to reform the SPLA was not successful in preventing something like this [the split of the SPLA in the war] is quite obvious,” he told me.  This admission, however, does little for the children toting arms now and those who will do so in the years ahead as part of what Burnett calls “a widening problem of child-soldiering,” due to “even more incidences of recruitment of children by armed groups within this conflict.”

Click here to see a larger version

Young children with toy guns, Tomping Protection of Civilians Site, Juba, South Sudan, July 2014.

Walking through a camp for internally displaced persons at a U.N. base in South Sudan’s capital, Juba, one blazing hot day last summer, I watched a young girl in a bright pink dress and sporting a huge smile, and a somewhat younger boy in pink shorts and gray sandals chase each other through the muck.  Each of them was holding a tiny, black plastic pistol and pretending to shoot the other, just the type of game I reveled in as a boy. 

As they raced around me, splattering mud and laughing, however, I began to wonder if one day just a few years down the road, she might be pressed into cooking or carrying water for soldiers and he might find himself with a real weapon thrust into his hands.  It’s a sad fact that, not so many years from now, I might well encounter that young boy — his toy pistol exchanged for a real assault rifle — on some out-of-the-way tarmac in the hinterlands of South Sudan.  Should that day ever come, I imagine I’ll feel just as unnerved as I did that morning in Malakal when a boy soldier turned his weapon in my direction.  I’ll then find little comfort in President Obama’s contention that looking the other way on child soldiers is in “the national interest of the United States.”  And I’m sure I’ll be just as disturbed that those “interests” — cited by a president who has his own kids — so easily trumped the interests of that boy in Malakal and the rest of South Sudan’s children.

Nick Turse is the managing editor of TomDispatch.com and a fellow at the Nation Institute.  A 2014 Izzy Award and American Book Award winner for his book Kill Anything That Moves, he has reported from the Middle East, Southeast Asia, and Africa and his pieces have appeared in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Nation, and regularly at TomDispatch. His latest book, Tomorrow’s Battlefield: U.S. Proxy Wars and Secret Ops in Africa, has just been published.  Reporting for this article was made possible by the generous support of Lannan Foundation and the Investigative Fund at the Nation Institute.

Follow TomDispatch on Twitter and join us on Facebook. Check out the newest Dispatch Book, Nick Turse’s Tomorrow’s Battlefield: U.S. Proxy Wars and Secret Ops in Africa, and Tom Engelhardt’s latest book, Shadow Government: Surveillance, Secret Wars, and a Global Security State in a Single-Superpower World.

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Sex Trafficking Survivors Get Second Chance When This Legal Group Fights To Expunge Their Convictions

After enduring nearly 15 years of sex trafficking, Nicole managed to escape the life, get sober and earn her bachelor’s degree.

But she couldn’t get a decent job.

“It’s just not a good fit,” Nicole, now in her mid-40s, recalled hiring managers telling her over and over again.

The immovable roadblock was beyond her control, and one that countless sex trafficking victims face.

Nicole had collected five drug, prostitution and loitering-related charges and convictions from the late ’90s to early 2000s– all for crimes she was forced to commit.

But no matter how hard she tried, Nicole, who was lured into the brutal world by an abusive boyfriend when she was a teenager, couldn’t get her record expunged. The process is notoriously challenging in the U.S., but was all but impossible in New York where the option, for any crime, just didn’t exist.

“Since sex trafficking has existed, victims have been punished for the crimes their traffickers have forced them to commit,” ,” Kate Mogulescu, a public defender at Legal Aid in New York City, told The Huffington Post.

But that system is starting to ease up for trafficking survivors, thanks in large part to Mogulescu’s efforts to develop a unit within Legal Aid that caters specifically to vacating the records of sex trafficking victims.

It’s a welcome reprieve considering that sex trafficking is the fastest-growing business of organized crime. The number of victims internationally is estimated as being somewhere in the millions, according to the FBI.

An estimated 293,000 youths alone are at risk of being sexually exploited in the U.S.

Nailing down precise figures remains a challenge due to a lack of funding and the fact that victims are too fearful to come forward.

Compounding the issue is the fact that police often can’t detect the difference between someone who has been forced into the sex trade and a consensual sex worker.

That means that even when a trafficking victim is caught selling sex, she’s labeled a “prostitute” — a mark that, until now, was fated to tarnish her record for the rest of her life.

Mogulescu first started taking an interest in these specific cases in 2009 when she noticed an overwhelming number of victims, like Nicole, who had managed to overcome awful atrocities, but couldn’t get a break before the law.

“This was a group that had been disregarded and ignored for so long,” Mogulescu said. “Prostitution cases were historically seen as ‘disposable.’ They were expected to be resolved right away, no thought — just guilty right away and move along.”

While Mogulescu was working to get her nascent unit off the ground, the Sex Workers Project, along with a number of legal experts, were pushing for a law that would vindicate trafficking survivors.

In 2010, New York passed the “Vacating Convictions Law,” and was the first state to take such groundbreaking action.

Essentially, if a victim committed a crime as a result of having been trafficked, the court would have to wipe it completely from the record.

Since then, 23 states have passed similar laws.

“It’s amazing to watch the map fill up,” Mogulescu said.

The very same year New York passed its vacating legislation, Mogulescu, along with one social worker, launched the pilot program within Legal Aid to give trafficking survivors a fresh start.

But while the vacatur law was a major boon, the process involved to get a client prepared to go before the court was no less cumbersome.

Sessions with clients often began with Mogulescu saying, “We’re going to write a book about your life.”

The next steps involved getting survivors to open up about the darkest moments of their lives that they had hoped to forget.

To construct an airtight case, the client has to delineate in detail what made her vulnerable enough to get recruited into the world of trafficking, which often involves digging deep into painful child and medical records.

“Some of it isn’t legally essential, but it’s important to put faces and stories in context around this stuff,” Mogulescu said. “We need to understand the nuance and complexity of each case.”

Some of the cases span as far back as the ’70s, and it’s not uncommon for a survivor to have been arrested more than 100 times for prostitution.

This requires the client to revisit each arrest and explain how each one was connected to her trafficking ordeal.

Mogulescu filed her first motion in 2011 and hit the ground running from there. Two years later, it expanded into a citywide unit — with an attorney, social worker and case handler in each borough.

The unit has received funding from the NoVo Foundation, a group that aims to advance girls’ rights and protect them from violence. It has also got additional probono assistance from Cleary Gottlieb Steen & Hamilton, which has worked on 23 out of the 59 motions filed.

Since it’s first case, the Legal Aid group has had a 100 percent success rate.

It has vacated more than 600 convictions for 43 separate individuals.

“I want to shout it from the rooftops,” Mogulescu said of her group’s success. “These are the most fulfilling cases, the most transformative. It’s an amazing remedy.”

More importantly, she wants to see other legal groups replicate her unit. Survivors living in states without vacatur laws or a program to help them get justice say they’re stuck, and struggle to move on without such help.

Laurin Crosson, 48, was trafficked for more than two decades after getting inducted into the life by a man she believed loved her, she told HuffPost. She was involved in the West Coast “circuit,” which meant that about every six weeks, she’d get sent to tour through Seattle, Portland, Las Vegas, San Francisco and other parts of California to “work.”

Crosson said she’s been arrested over 200 times, for prostitution and other charges, many times in states that don’t have vacatur laws.

Until recently, Crosson was unemployed and living in a friend’s basement in Utah because her record precluded her from landing a job or getting her own apartment.

“We can’t get jobs. It ruins our lives,” she said.

Crosson abandoned the traditional job route in 2013 when she launched her nonprofit RockStarr Ministries, which offers support to trafficking survivors. A month ago, she opened up her first safe house, which provides emergency services to sex trafficking victims.

But for every Crosson, there are plenty of Nicoles who can’t take a meaningful step forward without getting their records expunged.

Nicole, a self-described “mover and shaker” was able to enroll in a now-defunct program, where she spent more than two years getting sober, engaging in intense therapy and developing long-term goals. She went so far as to submit her certificates of relief when she interviewed for jobs, but her tainted background kept her from getting the role she dreamed of, becoming a civil servant so she could give back to the city.

“People judged you. It was very shaming,” Nicole said of how it felt to constantly get rejected from jobs for which she was often overqualified. “Back then I felt like the shit on the bottom of your shoe.”

After enduring an endless runaround, Nicole visited the Bronx Legal Aid in 2012 just as the office was closing. A “nice woman” there sent her Mogulescu’s way who immediately started on Nicole’s case in February.

Her convictions were vacated in December.

She currently works Monday to Friday from 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. as a civil servant in New York. Her credit score in now an impressive 750.

“Up until the convictions were vacated they were basically obstacles, like a black cloud over my head that never left me,” Nicole said. “Just standing in front of the judge and listening to the fact that the convictions were vacated … It was a very freeing and happy moment.”

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Kendall And Kylie Jenner Booed While Introducing Kanye West At Billboard Music Awards

Kendall and Kylie Jenner did not get the warmest reception when they took the stage to introduce Kanye West’s performance at the Billboard Music Awards Sunday night.

The Jenner girls were seemingly booed by some people in the crowd at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas when they introduced their brother-in-law, who performed a heavily censored medley of “All Day” and “Black Skinhead.”

The sisters attended Sunday night’s event with designer Olivier Rousteing. Kendall Jenner rocked a piece from his upcoming Balmain x H&M collection.

kendall jenner

kylie jenner

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Elizabeth Warren Details Obama's Broken Trade Promises

WASHINGTON — Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.) issued a report Monday morning detailing decades of failed trade enforcement by American presidents including Barack Obama, the latest salvo in an ongoing public feud between Warren and Obama over the Trans-Pacific Partnership.

Obama is currently negotiating the major trade pact with 11 other nations. While the text of the TPP agreement remains classified information, it is strongly supported by Republican leaders in Congress and corporate lobbying groups including the U.S. Chamber of Commerce. The deal is opposed by most congressional Democrats, along with labor unions, environmental groups and advocates of Internet freedom.

Obama has repeatedly insisted the TPP will include robust labor protections, and has dismissed Warren’s criticisms as “dishonest,” “bunk” and “misinformation.” On Monday, Warren fired back, showing that Obama simply has not effectively enforced existing labor standards in prior trade pacts. According to the report, a host of abuses, from child labor to the outright murder of union organizers, have continued under Obama’s watch with minimal pushback from the administration.

“The United States does not enforce the labor protections in its trade agreements,” the report reads, citing analyses from the Government Accountability Office, the State Department and the Department of Labor.

Of the 20 countries the U.S. currently has trade agreements with, 11 have documented reliance on child labor, forced labor or other human rights abuses related to labor, according to the report. The violations are not confined to exploitation. Since Obama finalized a labor action plan with the government of Colombia in 2011, 105 union activists have been murdered. Obama called the Colombian deal “a win-win for workers” at the time.

Despite these trade violations, none of these countries have faced significant consequences from the United States government.

Warren’s report undercuts an Obama public relations offensive that has repeatedly characterized TPP as “the most progressive trade deal in history.” The Senate is currently considering legislation that would grant Obama “fast track” authority, barring Congress from amending any trade pact he negotiates, including TPP. Liberals are concerned TPP will exacerbate income inequality and undermine key regulations.

But while much of the TPP controversy has concerned the legal language involved in the agreement itself, Warren’s report highlights a broader concern among progressives. Regardless of what the final TPP deal looks like, presidents Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and Obama himself, have all failed to effectively enforce promises to protect workers, even as rogue regimes have continued to benefit from other provisions of the agreements.

“We have two decades of experience with free trade agreements under both Democratic and Republican Presidents. Supporters of these agreements have always promised that they contain tough standards to protect workers,” the report reads. “The rhetoric has not matched the reality.”

The Obama administration has said it takes labor violations seriously and has pushed countries to improve conditions.

“The Obama Administration is taking unprecedented actions to promote and protect fundamental labor rights and ensure acceptable conditions of work,” reads a joint report from the Department of Labor and the Office of the U.S. Trade Representative from February. Those commitments include “bringing the first-ever labor dispute under a free trade agreement”– in Guatemala.

But labor unions and other critics say these measures have been ineffective. The AFL-CIO has been pressing for action on Guatemalan violations for Obama’s entire term in office, and the dispute remains unresolved. Meanwhile, as Warren’s report documents, Guatemala remains one of the most dangerous places in the world for union workers. In 2013 and 2014, according to the AFL-CIO, 17 labor activists were murdered in Guatemala while the Obama administration pursued diplomatic action. Three of the slain union workers were reportedly killed during a dispute with a local government over unpaid back wages.

Much of Warren’s trade critique has focused on the capacity for free trade pacts to undermine financial regulations. Last week, Canadian Finance Minister Joe Oliver gave a speech arguing that a key tenet of Obama’s 2010 Wall Street reform law violates the North American Free Trade Agreement.

Read the full Warren report here.

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Dodging a Bullet

As I sat at the end of the table listening to people explaining what they feared losing the most, I found myself looking at my brand new medic alert bracelet and feeling completely out of place. Having a near-death experience just two short weeks before had completely altered my perspective, and I could no longer imagine myself lamenting the potential loss of anything other than my life. And with that literal ace in my hand, I pushed myself away from the table, quietly excused myself and walked out of the room, anxious to do something else. Anything else.

The subject of the morning’s discussion group was “What Have You Got to Lose,” and I patiently listened as people spoke of their fear of losing jobs, pensions, their feeling of competency and all I could hear was my own inner voice shouting that I was most afraid of losing my life before I had the chance to experience a relationship as meaningful as the one I have with my dog. And that really scared me, so I had to go.

It had hit me like a lightning bolt one afternoon, the sensation of a harpoon in my back. Convinced (and really hopeful) that it was merely a gas bubble that needed to be jostled free, I twisted and stretched in ways that surprised me in an effort to break it loose, but it only got worse. When the chills swept over me and I felt feverish, I knew something was terribly wrong, and the next thing I knew, I was in an ambulance.

As I struggled to recount my medical history for the emergency room doctor who couldn’t figure out what was happening to me, I suddenly remembered that I had a blood clot in my right retinal vein back in 2001. As soon as I revealed this tidbit, I was whisked off to radiology for a CT Scan, and shortly thereafter, the mystery pain was identified. I had a pulmonary embolism. The doctor said these things are often diagnosed in autopsy, with the first symptom being sudden death, and he and I were both rather impressed that I had survived. I have a genetic defect called Factor Five Leiden that makes me a super clotter. After my retinal vein occlusion, I was prescribed the blood thinner Warfarin, and a couple of years down the road, my doctor said he didn’t think I needed to take it anymore. Delighted by the prospect of not having regular blood tests and dealing with the dietary restrictions that went along with taking that blood thinner, I did not question him.

I should have.

The good news is that I have the most amazing and beautiful friends anyone could ask for, and for that I am truly fortunate. Seeing my friends magically appear in my hospital room when they live 150 miles away was a powerful moment that I’ll always treasure.

This experience taught me a lot of things, not the least of which is to assume a more active role in my healthcare. It’s important that I understand my condition and educate myself on how to manage it and hopefully avoid another incident like this one. I’m not sure which frightened me more — the embolism itself, or the helpful nurse who asked me if I had a will and an advance health care directive. Regardless, I feel I’ve been given a tremendous gift, and I don’t want to waste it. As soon as I can take a deep breath again, I intend to shout that from a rooftop.

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Bacon And Popcorn Belong Together

It’s always a pleasure to plop down on the couch to watch a movie with a salty bowl of popcorn, but add bacon and that pleasure becomes a savory thrill.

If you’ve never thought to bring bacon and popcorn together, that’s just fine — there is no better time than now. This recipe comes from how-to Youtube channel Cottage Food Life. The bacon is infused with maple syrup, the kettle popcorn is cooked in bacon grease, and suddenly, you have a new favorite movie snack. Get the recipe from the video above, sit back and enjoy the show.

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