Women Who Inspire Me Series: Interview With SixPackMommy

The world has some strong, empowering females that deserve a spotlight. This will be an on-going series of interviews with women that inspire, empower, and encourage me.

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Today, I had the pleasure of interviewing a dear friend of mine, mommy blogger extraordinaire SixPackMommy. She is not only a friend, but someone I deeply admire and who inspires me to be a better version of myself.
She often gets asked if her SixPack is a pack of beer or just really good abs. The answer is: She has 6 children. Let’s begin!

How did you get into writing?

I always loved writing; as a little kid, I was the geek that carried a notepad around and spontaneously
wrote crappy kid fiction. English was always my favorite class in school- I was lucky to have fun, quirky
and inspiring English teachers in school. I always kept journals, too. Still do!

What was your first published piece?

I had posted several pieces on small sites, but I’d say the first post to gain any traction was “5 Reasons
I’m Not Picking Up The Phone When You Call”. It was featured on the blog at The Huffington Post.

What’s your favorite published piece?

They Won’t Remember The Clean Towels

It was featured on The Huffington Post. It’s a central theme for me: reminding parents (like myself!) not to get hung up in the mom shaming and martyr mentality in parenting.

I know you have six kids, how the heck do you do it?

Coffee. Lots of coffee. I wouldn’t have any personality or energy without the java.
As far as the home, I try to stay organized and to get things done as efficiently as possible.
Writing has also been a great way to preserve my own “sense of self”. And keeping a blog to poke fun at
the insanity in my home has been a great way to laugh off things that would otherwise be VERY
stressful.

What would be your advice for young people wanting to get into the writing business?

For myself, starting a blog was the best way to build confidence in sharing my writing publicly. I loved,
and still love, having an online place of my “own” to share with the world. As far as getting published,
don’t be afraid to contact big online websites and news sites to pitch your writing to. Ignorance was bliss
for me in getting my first piece published in The Huffington Post; I didn’t know it was a challenge for others to be accepted. I just emailed them a piece that I thought was funny. The most important thing to
remember is to not let any rejection discourage you. I’ve had pieces rejected by a site, only to have it get
huge responses when it was accepted by another site. Never let a rejection determine your worth as a
writer.

What would be your advice for those who are just starting their families?

Pay off your student loan(s) first!! I jest, but the only thing I wish we’d done differently is been more
financially-savvy in the earlier, pre-kid years. And take a vacation with your spouse or significant other-
once you have kids, it might be awhile before you get that chance again.

What’s your favorite word in the English language?

Just one?? I like any word with a strong “k” sound. But if you’re referring to my most commonly used
word, it’s probably “appropriate”. As in, “it’s not appropriate to stick your fingers in the butter at the
table.” “It’s not appropriate to wag your butt at your teacher.” (You know. Kids.)

You can find SixPackMommy on Twitter @6PackMommy

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Black Women Creators Are Giving the Angry Black Woman Life

Apparently, interesting things happen when black women are in charge of their own stories. In recent weeks, they gave new life to the angry black woman. Let’s do a quick review. Underground‘s Ernestine (created by Misha Green) helped end the television show’s first season by slowly hanging a man to death and suggesting she would meet him in hell. Scandal‘s Olivia Pope (created by Shonda Rhimes) severely beat a man to death with a metal chair. And, in her visual album Lemonade, Beyoncé destroyed an entire street with a baseball bat and a monster truck.

Clearly it’s no exaggeration to say these ladies were a little angry. But they weren’t the stereotypical angry black women that Hollywood typically delivers. There was no wig snatching, neck snapping, or shade-filled catchphrases–all rooted in no apparent reason except that’s just the way black women are. These stories created about black women by black women are far more complicated and meaningful.

One of the major complications shared by Ernestine, Olivia, and Beyoncé is the history of American slavery. The institution is having a cultural moment given last year’s 150th anniversary of black emancipation and a growing collection of recent media content. The black women creators seemed to be playing with the theme of past as prologue. Slavery is the prologue to the book about black women in America. It set the context for the chapters (or the generations) that followed. The original authors thought black women had limited value and placed many limitations on our existence, making it okay to mistreat and abuse us.

The anger of Beyonce, Olivia, and Ernestine is directed towards certain other characters, but also towards that damn book. Their anger is justified. Their anger is a necessary step towards rewriting the story.

Anger leading to rebellious survival (Ernestine).
Ernestine’s connection to slavery is straightforward–Underground is a period drama and the character is a house slave on a southerner planation. For most of the season, she models for her children (and especially her daughter Rosa Lee) ways to survive. And, although Ernestine is from another era, every black person who watched the show knows her, someone in his or her world is cut from Ernestine’s same cloth. The characteristic strength and love of women like her has been clearly passed down from one generation to the next.

Ernestine’s justifiable rage is sparked when the plantation owner and father of her children decides to gruesomely murder their son in order to advance his political career. His later sexual advances and attempts at relationship would be an indescribable form of torture for any woman to endure. As a slave, that damn book would likely suggest limited options–perhaps suicide or insanity.

But, being a show focused on ways in which slaves resisted their condition, the writers had a third option in mind. Ernestine murdered the father in the same way the son was murdered–slowly and at the end of a noose while staring into the eyes of someone who should have loved him (for the father, that person was mother of his children and for the son, that person was his own father). As a slave, Ernestine had no choice but to live her whole life in survival mode. The depths of her anger were a necessary step towards taking justice rather than silently enduring a wrong. She rewrote that damn book to include a radical form of survival.

Anger leading to empowerment (Olivia). Over the course of five seasons of Scandal, fans have watched Olivia Pope battle an arms length list of shady and unsympathetic characters. It wasn’t until this season that she actually murdered someone. The former Vice-President of the United States made her angry. In a speech that, on the surface, referred to a prior incident in which Olivia had been kidnapped and almost sold to terrorists, former Vice-President Nichols clearly and unmistakably invoked images of slavery. He spoke of her sexuality as if it was a commodity, even speculating about how much he could get for her on the auction block.

Perhaps feeling a connection to her foremothers, Olivia screamed as she beat the wealthy and once powerful white man to death, “You don’t get revenge. I get revenge.”

For Olivia, her anger was necessary step towards rewriting that damn book. Instead of being forced to endure disrespect and horrible indignities, she not only took back her power but set her sights on taking all the power through control over the oval office. Although, it’s still unclear how that’s going to work out for her.

Anger leading to healing (Beyoncé).
She may have been the one causing all that conversation, but an oddly large number of commentators chose not to discuss the many images reminiscent of slavery and planation life that ran throughout Beyonce’s visual album Lemonade. The work also includes numerous references to generational transfers, beginning with the first few minutes in which she recites the following words from a poem: “In the tradition of men in my blood . . . the past and the future merge to meet us here. What luck! What a fucking curse!”

Certainly Beyoncé would not be the first person to suggest that the tragedy of slavery put a curse on all those who came after, impacting our relationships and the ways in which we see ourselves. But she is likely the first to turn the concept into a major pop culture moment. The work speaks to black women being devalued (most powerfully in a quote by Malcolm X), presumably by the larger society but also by their intimate partners.

So the Beyoncé character got angry, real angry. And like Ernestine and Olivia, she rewrote that damn book, the long-established expectations for black women. In recreating images reminiscent of the past, the women in the visual album are not clothed in rags reflective of the way they were actually treated but luxurious garments reflective of the women they actually were. Serena Williams is not behaving like the “ugly” and “mannish” figure from that damn book, but is dancing without a care in the world like beautiful and sexy woman she actually is. And the focus on the legacy of brokenness and hurt gives way to the brighter light of how our grandmothers taught us to love and make lemonade out of our lemons.

In the end, Beyoncé’s anger was a necessary step towards understanding, forgiveness, true love, healing and hope.

All the Angry Black Women. I referred to the characters of Ernestine, Olivia, and Beyoncé rewriting that damn book. But the rewriting credit really goes to their creators, the black women creators like Shonda Rhimes, Misha Green, and Beyoncé who are demonstrating the value of diversity behind the camera. Through their storytelling, they are encouraging audiences to rethink the character outlines of past, contemporary, and future black women. A legacy of being devalued and forced to endure horrible injustices is continuing to morph into a story of radical survival, empowerment, and healing. In the words of Lemonade, “So we’re going to heal. We’re going to start again . . . The audience applauds but we can’t hear them.”

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

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