Please Stop Asking My Son What Sports He Plays

After a sweet exchange with the cashier, he turned, his kind eyes zeroed in on my son and he asked him, “What’s your favorite sport?”

No, not AGAIN!

It is so freaking common. Please stop. I get it, you’re being nice, and I thank you for seeing and acknowledging my child. But please, stop asking him what sports he plays.

He doesn’t like sports. I don’t know why. I don’t care. I can guess, but really, that’s not the point. The point is that he doesn’t like sports, so when people ask him which sports he plays, it takes that moment of, “Yes, you see me; I am part of this world,” and crushes it into another uncomfortable, and quite honestly, annoying moment.

His shoulders drop as he says, “Soccer.”

The cashier goes on about how awesome that is and gives him a high five. It’s the lamest high five… because my son was lying. I mean, not really. My son likes playing soccer with his buddies at recess and randomly in the driveway. But the sport of soccer… no. Would he want to play on a team? No. He doesn’t like sports. Period.

I want to step in and challenge this question. But I don’t. This is my son’s journey.

We talk about it as we walk out of Target. What else can he say? We trying coming up with something creative and funny.

“Do you play sports?”

“No, I’m a triathlete.”

“No, do you?”

“No, Sports are for girls.”

“What sports do you like?”

“The sport of happiness.”

“I run from girls.”

“Gross, sports are for girls.”

*Can you tell which one I like?

But he’s not that interested in challenging societal norms like I am, so he concludes that he does like soccer and is content with the easy answer.

I’m not. So I’ll keep asking people — yes, you people — to think about what you ask the children you meet in the world and what that says to them about expectations and acceptance.

I’ll keep asking you to get honest with yourself about how your biases influence the questions you ask boys and girls and what it means to even assume whether a child identifies as a boy or a girl. Notice your biases. Challenge yourself to see girls as more than just pretty and to see boys as more than just athletes. Because we are. And you know it.

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Leslie Jones Returns to Twitter: "I Always Get Back Up"

Good news for the undeserving people of Twitter.com: Leslie Jones has, again, returned to bless us with her tweets.

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Serena And Venus Williams On A U.S. Open Collision Course

NEW YORK (Reuters) – Serena and Venus Williams, the sisters with 29 grand slams and a stack of records between them, will try to maintain a collision course at the U.S. Open on Monday when they play their fourth-round matches.

World number one and defending champion Serena, trying to break the record of 22 grand slam titles she shares with Steffi Graf, plays number 52 Yaroslava Shvedova of Kazakhstan.

Sixth seed Venus, twice the champion in New York, faces Karolina Pliskova, the big-serving 10th seed from the Czech Republic.

Victory for both would put them one win away from a semi-final meeting at Flushing Meadows.

Top seed Serena is still managing the right shoulder injury she suffered at the Rio Olympic Games last month but says she is ready to hit peak form.

“I feel OK,” she said when asked to grade her performance in week one. “So far, so good.

“I don’t feel like I’m Serena out there yet, but hopefully she’ll come around the second week.”

Venus is into the fourth round for the second straight season, having gone four years without passing round three while she learned to cope with Sjogren’s syndrome, an auto-immune disease that causes chronic fatigue and muscle soreness.

“It’s just a lot of will power,” Venus said. “That’s really what it is. I started to feel better more consistently this year so I’m always trying to find things to help me feel my best.

“But even if I’m not feeling great, I still manage to get a good fight in out there.”

Men’s second seed Andy Murray, the Wimbledon and Olympic champion, takes on Grigor Dimitrov for a place in the quarter-finals.

Former champion Juan Martin del Potro, in the fourth round for the first time since 2012 after three operations on his left wrist, plays eighth seed Dominic Thiem.

Third seed Stan Wawrinka, sixth seed Kei Nishikori and women’s fourth seed Agnieszka Radwanska are also in fourth-round action.

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DAPL Pipeline Interests Try Outrageous Fait Accompli and Destroy Ancient Sites

Fait accompli (a thing that has already happened or been decided before those affected hear about it, leaving them with no option but to accept)

2016-09-04-1473028365-1033034-DSC_2077.jpg
Credit: Georgianne Nienaber

Energy Transfer Inc., and invested owners of the proposed North Dakota Access Pipeline (DAPL), have begun psychological warfare against peaceful protestors near the Standing Rock Sioux Reservation. It will be a challenge for the persecuted to stay vigilant, stay strong and stay true to their beliefs. So far the People have remained nonviolent in the face of dog attacks on their bodies and their horses, while facing extreme psychic trauma in the form of desecration of graves and sacred sites. On Saturday “sacred places containing ancient burial sites, places of prayer and other significant cultural artifacts of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe were destroyed by Energy Transfer Partners,” Tribal Chairman David Archambault II said in a press release.

The tribal Chairman also has an op-ed in the New York Times that clearly lays out the issues facing Standing Rock.

Acting with a slap in the face to the judicial process, Energy Transfer Inc., in partnership with the Enbridge Corporation and Marathon Oil, bulldozed a two mile, 150 feet wide path through land currently being contested in Federal Court. Meanwhile, ancient cairns and stone prayer rings can never be replaced.

Ask the question: How would you feel if a construction company bulldozed a family plot in a local cemetery that contained the remains of you family?

“We’re days away from getting a resolution on the legal issues, and they came in on a holiday weekend and destroyed the site,” said Jan Hasselman, attorney for the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe. “What they have done is absolutely outrageous.”

The site at the conjunction of the Cannonball and Missouri Rivers is not the only historic site at risk. Other culturally and historically significant sites will be damaged or destroyed as the DAPL crude oil pipeline snakes 1168 miles through North Dakota, South Dakota, Iowa and Illinois.

Stopping A Fait Accompli

Immediately recognizing the need to stop this process, on August 4, 2016 the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe along with attorneys from Earthjustice filed a motion with supporting documents for a preliminary injunction against the DAPL. The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers (USACE) issued the initial permitting for the pipeline. Federal Judge James E. Boasberg rejected the motion to ignore the injunction request and ordered a status conference on September 14, leaving room for discussion after his ruling on September 9.

That fact that the corps ruled in favor of the DAPL routing to begin with is beyond puzzling, since not one, but three Federal agencies opposed it. The Environmental Protection Agency, the Department of the Interior, and the Advisory Council on Historic Preservation have all said that the USACE had not done an adequate Environmental Impact Statement (EIS), mainly with regard to drinking water.

Most recently, representatives of the United Nations Permanent Forum on Indigenous Issues said the same, and that the Tribe must have a say.

There is separate discussion about the corps illegally discharging into federally protected wetlands, but the effort to stop the fait accompli of destruction of historical and sacred sites is the main issue here. One needs look no further than violations of the National Historic Preservation Act (NHPA) by the permitting agency, the USACE. These egregious violations and the consequence came into full view this Saturday.

Reading through the 53 page initial “motion for the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers to withdraw Nationwide Permit 12 as applied to the Dakota Access Pipeline, and to withdraw verifications issued on July 25, 2016 for the Dakota Access Pipeline to discharge in federally regulated waters at 204 sites along the pipeline route,” is tedius, yet informative. Everyone connected with the protest should study it. One is struck by the testimony that destruction of ancient burial grounds and ceremonial sites constitutes “irreparable injury to the Tribe and its members.”

The regulatory process remains incomplete, numerous lawsuits have been filed against DAPL and the corps, and significant public controversy surrounds the project. Yet Energy Transfer Inc. seeks to render the legal dispute moot by finalizing construction before the Tribe can be heard. The dog attacks and bulldozing over the weekend were an attempt to force a violent confrontation, but the protestors held fast to their peaceful intent in spite of extreme psychological and physical duress.

The Standing Rock Sioux, as a successor to the Great Sioux Nation, is party to the Treaties of Fort Laramie 1851 and 1868. The 18,000 enrolled members view the water and ancestral lands as sacred entities. The tribe learned that the original configuration of the DAPL pipeline was upstream of Bismarck, but was later moved to one half mile outside of the reservation’s current and “official” boundary and upstream of the 18,000 residents by only one half mile.

The “main camp” with the majority of the protesters is located on U.S. Army Corps of Engineer’s land just north of the Cannonball River. The North Dakota Department of Emergency Services says it is not on tribal property, but the original treaty line was moved in 1889, so if you support broken treaties, you could call it illegal. In this case legality is in the eye of the beholder. The bulldozers and attack dogs wrought their destruction near the borehole site, which is a main focus of the request for a preliminary injunction.

The pipeline is scheduled to run under Lake Oahe, and Lake Oahe is where we begin.

The Timeline

On February 17, 2015 the USACE sent a letter to the Tribal Historian Preservation Office (THPO).

The USACE permitting process is the only Federal action associated with the project and therefore USACE is solely responsible for conducting consultation with interested Tribes in accordance with Section 106 of the National Historic Preservation Act. The purpose of this letter is to initiate Section 106 consultation and review, determine your interest in consulting on this undertaking, and to gather information that will assist the Corps in identifying historic properties.

In several subsequent responsive emails, the THPO requested a full archeological investigation. By August 19, 2015, the USACE had still not responded.

On September 15, 2015, the tribe got a form letter asking if it wanted to participate in the National Historic Preservation Act process, and was given a month to respond.

The THPO responded and emphasized that the tribe, thus far, was not allowed to participate in Section 106 of National Historic Preservation Act.

Several more months went by with no response and then a lie was used by the USACE to obfuscate and delay.

The corps instead published a draft Environmental Assessment (EA) in mid-December 2015 for Lake Oahe and “falsely stated that THPO had indicated no impact to tribe,” according the docket filed in Federal Court.

But, like Mark Twain once said, “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”

The Corps had already received critical letters from USEPA, US Department of Interior and ACHP regarding water and historical preservation oversights.

Meanwhile tribes in Iowa and the Osage Nation in the Omaha District were experiencing the same stonewalling from the USACE.

Finally, the Omaha District Commander for the corps toured the borehole site on Lake Oahe on February 29, 2016.

A follow up by archeologists from the corps and the Tribe on March 7, 2016 witnessed places where moles had pushed dirt to the surface containing prehistoric pottery shards, pieces of bone, flint and tools. Even the tribes were unaware of these sites.

Shockingly, the corps continued the lie and wrote an assessment on April 22, 2016 that “no historic properties” were affected by the Lake Oahe decision.

Moles vs. Machines (an aside)

Readers can decide for themselves if moles are bringing artifacts to the surface all over the area of DAPL at Lake Oahe, is it really possible that NOTHING was found at the bore hole site? USACE did not find one, not even ONE, artifact near the future bore pit location? Stretches the imagination. The American Auger DD440T is the machine of preference for this project.

Then of course we have the moles. No schematic is necessary, but this member of the insectivores is certainly efficient and truthful.

Advice From Someone Who Fought the Corps and Won

In a very interesting op-ed, “I triumphed over the Army Corps of Engineers and the Sioux Nation can, too,” the founder of levees.org, Sandy Rosenthal, offers some sage advice to the Sioux Nation direct from New Orleans. Here are some edited comments:

Don’t give up. The corps may appear disconnected from reality, but in fact there is most definitely a behind-the-scenes plan. Meanwhile, the corps stalls. They stall and stall. The corps expects you to get tired and frustrated. Accept that the corps will never formally admit they made a mistake. Recognize that personal attacks are a sign you are winning. Personal attacks and ad hominem criticism are a sure sign that you’re asking the right questions. They are evidence that you are a very real threat. Stay the course.

The Present

On July 25, 2016, the corps issued the final NWP 12 verification at 204 sites in four states, including Lake Oahe. The corps did not mention 106 compliance but allowed a farcical “Tribal Monitoring Plan” that allowed tribal members to watch construction.

In a bait and switch, the final EA and Finding of No Significant Impact (FONSI) acknowledged the risk of oil spills, spill response and mitigation.

This has not worked out very well on other spills.

Still, the corps found “no direct or indirect impacts to Standing Rock Tribe,” even though spills are a risk and some would say a probability for the people downstream. Bismarck must be breathing a sigh of relief about now, since the pipeline was not placed in their backyard.

The corps insists that APE (Areas of Potential Effects) for Lake Oahe crossing are composed of “only” unsupervised bore holes, stringing and staging areas, and access routes, according to the corps. Never mind the miles of unmapped and undiscovered remnants of the mighty Sioux Nation.

One Setback and Another Filing

The Three Affiliated Tribes at Fort Berthold ordered a separate project halted amid concern that the Sacagawea Pipeline developer Paradigm Energy Partners needed tribal permission to place the pipelines beneath Lake Sakakawea.

U.S. District Court Judge Daniel Hovland disagreed and allowed construction to continue. On Thursday, the judge again refused to stop construction. He’s expected to rule within the next two weeks on whether the company should’ve gotten tribal permission and the project can move forward.

The Standing Rock Sioux Tribe says it “surveyed a portion of the Dakota Access Pipeline route this week and discovered multiple graves and other significant historical sites not previously identified,” according to Indian Country Today.

Court documents filed Friday include statements from Tim Mentz, former tribal historic preservation officer.

Mentz writes that the survey located “at least 27 burials, 16 stone rings, 19 effigies and other features in or adjacent to the pipeline corridor just north of the Standing Rock reservation.”

In a sad conclusion that brings us all up to date, this is the area bulldozed by Energy Transfer, Inc. — the very definition of psychological and physical warfare– the use of dogs, pepper spray, and desecration of sacred grounds.

Over a period of days spent at the camps last week, I learned about the Bird Song. According to Native spiritual beliefs, the bird song was given to the people to teach respect and empathy. Instead of bulldozing their way into getting what it wants, perhaps DAPL interests might want to try listening to a people who have experienced extreme loss and generational trauma over the last 500 years. They are still here. the people can endure much, and remain peaceful.

This is more than the security forces for Energy Transfer have demonstrated.

The Bird Songs song have not been silenced. Listen. Just Listen. Please just listen.

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Humans Are Wiping Out Their Closest Relatives

HONOLULU ― If humans continue down our current path, we may soon find ourselves living in a world with no other great apes.

On Sunday, the Eastern gorilla, the largest living primate species, was listed as critically endangered on the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s updated Red List of Endangered Species.

The reclassification means that four out of the six non-human great ape species ― the Eastern gorilla, Western gorilla, Bornean orangutan and Sumatran orangutan ― are now listed by IUCN as critically endangered, the closest category to extinction. The other two, the chimpanzee and bonobo, are listed as endangered. 

“Today is kind of a sad day because the IUCN Red List shows we are wiping out some of our closest relatives,” Inger Andersen, IUCN’s director general, said Sunday during a press conference a the organization’s World Conservation Congress in Honolulu.

Over the last 20 years, the Eastern gorilla has seen a “devastating population decline” of more than 70 percent, mainly as the result of illegal hunting, according to the world conservation union. One subspecies, the Grauer’s gorilla, has dropped from 16,900 to 3,800 individuals since 1994, while the other, the mountain gorilla, has a population of around 880.

“We are the only one species of great ape that is not threatened with extinction,” said Carlo Rondinini, a research scientist at Sapienza University of Rome and member of the IUCN red list committee. “This is something we should really reflect about.”

The Eastern gorilla’s new designation comes on the heels of an April survey by the Wildlife Conservation Society that showed an estimated 77 to 93 percent decline in Grauer’s gorilla across its range. 

In a statement Sunday, the survey’s lead author, Andrew Plumptre, a senior conservationist in the WCS Uganda program, applauded IUCN for accepting the new listing recommendation. 

“Critical Endangered status will raise the profile of this gorilla subspecies and bring attention to its plight,” Plumptre said. “It has tended to be the neglected ape in Africa, despite being the largest ape in the world.”

IUCN’s updated list highlights the extinction crisis taking place across the planet. In addition to Eastern gorillas, the plains zebra was uplisted from “least concern” to “near threatened” following a 24 percent population loss over the past 14 years. Three species of African antelope also moved to near threatened.

In Hawaii, a biodiversity hotspot, 38 of 415 assessed endemic plants are listed as extinct, with an additional four existing only in cultivation and listed as extinct in the wild, according to IUCN.

“This update also highlights, for example, the devastating impact of invasive species,” Andersen said Sunday. About 87 percent of Hawaii’s endemic plants are threatened with extinction.

But IUCN’s updated list also offered glimmers of hope. Thanks to conservation efforts by the Chinese government, for example, the giant panda is on the mend. The species’ status was updated Sunday from endangered to vulnerable. 

Additionally, the Tibetan antelope moved from endangered to near threatened.

Andersen said it is vital for the list to drive conservation action ― otherwise species will be lost forever.

“And once they are gone, they really are gone,” she said. 

IUCN’s World Conservation Congress, which is being held in the U.S. for the first time in the organization’s 68-year history, is the world’s largest environment and nature conservation event, often referred to as the Olympics of conservation. The year’s event has drawn more than 9,000 delegates from 190 nations.

During a panel discussion at the conference Saturday, famed British anthropologist Jane Goodall said that when it comes to protecting the planet, apathy is unacceptable. Every single person has a role to play and a choice to make, she said.

“We have been stealing the planet from our children for years,” Goodall said. “We’re still stealing it today.”

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Theresa May Breaks With Brexiteers Over Immigration Proposals

HANGZHOU, China, Sept 4 (Reuters) – British Prime Minister Theresa May cast doubt on Sunday on the effectiveness of ‘points-based’ immigration systems that screen applicants on the basis of factors like education and skills, setting up a potential conflict with some of her own ministers.

Foreign minister Boris Johnson and trade minister Liam Fox were part of the ‘Brexit’ camp that argued that voting to leave the European Union would free Britain from the duty to admit all EU nationals who want to live and work here, enabling it to cut immigration by introducing an Australian-style points system.

May, who favored staying in the EU but has promised to deliver on the June 23 referendum vote by steering Britain out of the bloc and tightening border controls, said such systems were difficult to manage.

“One of the issues is whether or not points-based systems do work,” she told reporters on her way to a G20 summit in China, citing her experience as Britain’s longest-serving interior minister in over 50 years.

“There is no single silver bullet that is the answer in terms of dealing with immigration.”

The comments offer the first glimpse into May’s stance on the hardest conundrum thrown up by the referendum: how to tighten border controls with the EU without losing access to its single market.

Its 27 partners are so far adamant that it cannot enjoy full trade benefits unless it continues to let in EU nationals as before.

WATERED-DOWN BREXIT

The prime minister risks upsetting key members of the team she assembled in July to deliver an EU exit that protects Britain’s global standing and carves out a new role for the country at the vanguard of global free trade.

Speaking in June before he was appointed as foreign minister, Johnson – figurehead of the Leave campaign and May’s one-time rival for the prime minister’s job – said a points-based system could bring back democratic control and better meet businesses’ needs.

May’s words will fuel fears among voters and Eurosceptic lawmakers that having a pro-Remain prime minister in charge will result in a watered-down version of Brexit that does not represent what people voted for.

May also declined to commit, when asked, to Leave campaign promises to increase healthcare spending and reduce energy taxes.

Asked whether immigration controls precluded access to the single market, May said she was optimistic about what sort of deal Britain could negotiate.

“I want to be ambitious with what we can achieve, I don’t take anything for granted, I’m going out there to get the best possible deal.”

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Scientists Just Made a Working Laser Using Blood

Lasers are behind so much of our cutting-edge technology. Now scientists at the University of Michigan have successfully shown that is possible to build a working laser with blood, the better to spot tumors in the human body.

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The Writing Life: The Past Never Leaves You, Or Does It?

I have often said that my worst professional mistake was leaving the clangorous world of daily newspapers for magazines and book writing. Of course, that was back in 1985, a very different time for the media, and for the world.

The digital era had not yet dawned, and we “hacks” – as print journalists, particularly foreign correspondents, were known – scrambled around in search of stories. We then scrambled around some more to find a post office with a telex machine to file our dispatches to our home offices. No email in those days, no satellite phones either. Your dispatches depended on the caprice of the telex operation. He was more influenced by the graft you gave than the novelty, timeliness and piquancy of your stories.

My search for stories took me to Africa, where the New York Times had posted me in the lovely Kenyan capital of Nairobi. From there I crisscrossed the vast continent. I felt a little bit like Marlow, the narrator of “Heart of Darkness,” the celebrated novella by Polish-British novelist Joseph Conrad, about a voyage up the Congo River into the Congo Free State, in the heart of Africa.

That novella has been the basis of several films, perhaps the best known being Francis Ford Coppola’s “Apocalypse Now,” released in 1979. As Wikipedia puts it: “In Vietnam in 1970, Captain Willard (Martin Sheen) takes a perilous and increasingly hallucinatory journey upriver to find and terminate Colonel Kurtz (Marlon Brando), a once-promising officer who has reportedly gone completely mad. In the company of a Navy patrol boat filled with street-smart kids, a surfing-obsessed Air Cavalry officer (Robert Duvall), and a crazed freelance photographer (Dennis Hopper), Willard travels further and further into the heart of darkness.”

It was a romantic time to be a foreign correspondent. The Times was generous with travel budgets; it no longer is. But, on occasion, a skeptical accountant at headquarters would ask if it was really necessary to fly to Paris from Nairobi in East Africa in order to get to the Senegalese capital of Dakar in West Africa. Well, yes. Especially if the stopover in Paris lasted at least a day during which to sample the delights of Montmartre. After all, being a hack in those days wasn’t easy – all that traveling, all those stopovers, all those missed flights. You understand, right? The accountant didn’t, and would scrutinize my travel expenses with a beady eye.

I still remember him well. Turned out to be a jolly fellow who, after a pint of ale or two, regaled me with hilarious stories of the outrageous expense reports that some correspondents filed.

I’m now at that age when memories are far more restive than anticipation of the future. The journalism that I grew up in, that nourished me, that transported me around the world, that offered me opportunities to listen to dramatic stories of everyday people and the exaggerations of potentates – that journalist era has evaporated, and its great practitioners are dead or dying.

But what adventures they were, however long ago.

I ask myself: Did it all really happen? Was I really that fortunate? And what happened to the scores of people I met in a multitude of societies, and ate with and laughed with and sometimes shed tears with? Did their dreams of a better life materialize? And what about the ambitions of their children in a world that, because of technology and the exigencies of politics, would soon be so different from the one in which their forebears were raised?

They may be part of my increasingly receding past. But the past never really leaves you alone. You may want to push parts of it away, the unpleasant ones anyway, but those episodes and characters surface when you least expect it. Which is mostly all the time.

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Labor Day Blues

As my late friend, zoology professor Mark Rowland, liked to say when addressing the emotional issue of pro-life vs. pro-choice: “Some people see the uterus as half-empty, and others see it as half-full.” That mordant, binary sentiment could apply to the current state of organized labor.

According to some observers, the once vaunted American labor movement is either already dead or is in the process of dying a hideous death. Granted, these pessimistic observers consist largely of sheltered academics, Chamber of Commerce officers, and Michigan Republicans.

But other, more optimistic observers happily note that, with 14.8 million people belonging to unions (11-percent of the workforce), the U.S. labor movement is still a vital–if unfocussed and demoralized–force to be reckoned with.

Do the math. If the National Rifle Association (NRA), with a membership of barely 5 million, can strike terror in the hearts of America’s lawmakers, surely 14.8 million union workers have the ability to make some noise.

Union people will tell you that there are two legislative moves required to level the playing field. The first is passage of the EFCA (Employee Free Choice Act), which would make “card check” the law of the land, effectively eliminating the bureaucratic morass and stalling tactics regularly used by management.

While hypocritical businessmen pretend that, like the powdered wig set of the 18th century, they abhor Big Government, when it comes to workers being allowed to freely join a union, they beg the feds to intervene, beg them to step in and make joining a union as complicated a procedure as becoming a U.S. citizen.

And this isn’t an ideological or constitutional issue for these profit-takers; it’s an economic one. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics (2015), the average weekly wage for a union employee is $980, and the average weekly wage for a non-union worker is $776. Simple as that.

The second thing is repeal of half the provisions in the 1947 Taft-Hartley Act (including prohibition of secondary boycotts and sympathy strikes). This anti-labor law, passed over the veto of President Truman, defanged the 1935 National Labor Relations Act (the Wagner Act), ushered in the toxic phenomenon of “right to work” states, and rendered organized labor more or less powerless by cutting its nuts off.

Beginning in the late 1970s, in response to the implementation of UAW “emergency concessions,” and continuing into the early 1980s, when President Reagan declared “open season” on organized labor by firing more than 11,000 PATCO workers (air traffic controllers), union activists have been engaged in a lively debate over how best to spend AFL-CIO funds. One thing the House of Labor has plenty of is money.

While some people want to see the lion’s share of AFL-CIO discretionary spending used for national organizing drives, others want to see it spent on stuff like advertising, community awareness, “education” and political donations.

Not that the Democrats have done organized labor any favors lately, but I’ve always favored the political donation route. Consider: If reactionary, draconian laws were what crippled us, then progressive, labor-friendly laws must be what makes us whole.

An officer with an International that must remain nameless, once suggested a crazy idea. Given that the AFL-CIO spent an estimated $50 million trying (and failing) to organize Wal-Mart, and given that lobbyists and donors are the mother’s milk of politics, and given that money has already poisoned the well, the AFL-CIO should consider bribery.

They should identify 50 congressmen who could a make difference in the outcome of critical labor votes and then have a bag man discreetly deliver each of them $200,000 in cash. Don’t call it a “bribe.” Call it a “donation.”

Donations of $200,000 to 40 key House members and 10 key senators would amount to $10 million, which the AFL-CIO could easily afford. It’s clean, it’s quick, and it beats the hell out of wasting money on futile Wal-Mart campaigns. In return, unfair labor laws are repealed and the American worker is given a fighting chance.

Let’s not get all self-righteous. After all, isn’t this how the military-industrial complex functions? Hasn’t the Saudi royal family, going all the way back to FDR, donated millions of dollars to the U.S. to gain preferential treatment? As Tom Hagen said to Santino Corleone, “It’s business, Sonny!”

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