David Brooks And A Figment Of The Neoconservative Imagination

Angst in the Church of America the Redeemer
Cross-posted with TomDispatch.com

Apart from being a police officer, firefighter, or soldier engaged in one of this nation’s endless wars, writing a column for a major American newspaper has got to be one of the toughest and most unforgiving jobs there is.  The pay may be decent (at least if your gig is with one of the major papers in New York or Washington), but the pressures to perform on cue are undoubtedly relentless.

Anyone who has ever tried cramming a coherent and ostensibly insightful argument into a mere 750 words knows what I’m talking about.  Writing op-eds does not perhaps qualify as high art.  Yet, like tying flies or knitting sweaters, it requires no small amount of skill.  Performing the trick week in and week out without too obviously recycling the same ideas over and over again ― or at least while disguising repetitions and concealing inconsistencies ― requires notable gifts.

David Brooks of the New York Times is a gifted columnist.  Among contemporary journalists, he is our Walter Lippmann, the closest thing we have to an establishment-approved public intellectual.  As was the case with Lippmann, Brooks works hard to suppress the temptation to rant.  He shuns raw partisanship.  In his frequent radio and television appearances, he speaks in measured tones.  Dry humor and ironic references abound.  And like Lippmann, when circumstances change, he makes at least a show of adjusting his views accordingly.

For all that, Brooks remains an ideologue.  In his columns, and even more so in his weekly appearances on NPR and PBS, he plays the role of the thoughtful, non-screaming conservative, his very presence affirming the ideological balance that, until November 8th of last year, was a prized hallmark of “respectable” journalism.  Just as that balance always involved considerable posturing, so, too, with the ostensible conservatism of David Brooks: it’s an act.

Praying at the Altar of American Greatness

In terms of confessional fealty, his true allegiance is not to conservatism as such, but to the Church of America the Redeemer.  This is a virtual congregation, albeit one possessing many of the attributes of a more traditional religion.  The Church has its own Holy Scripture, authenticated on July 4, 1776, at a gathering of 56 prophets.  And it has its own saints, prominent among them the Good Thomas Jefferson, chief author of the sacred text (not the Bad Thomas Jefferson who owned and impregnated slaves); Abraham Lincoln, who freed said slaves and thereby suffered martyrdom (on Good Friday no less); and, of course, the duly canonized figures most credited with saving the world itself from evil: Winston Churchill and Franklin Roosevelt, their status akin to that of saints Peter and Paul in Christianity.  The Church of America the Redeemer even has its own Jerusalem, located on the banks of the Potomac, and its own hierarchy, its members situated nearby in High Temples of varying architectural distinction.

This ecumenical enterprise does not prize theological rigor. When it comes to shalts and shalt nots, it tends to be flexible, if not altogether squishy. It demands of the faithful just one thing: a fervent belief in America’s mission to remake the world in its own image. Although in times of crisis Brooks has occasionally gone a bit wobbly, he remains at heart a true believer. 

In a March 1997 piece for The Weekly Standard, his then-employer, he summarized his credo.  Entitled “A Return to National Greatness,” the essay opened with a glowing tribute to the Library of Congress and, in particular, to the building completed precisely a century earlier to house its many books and artifacts.  According to Brooks, the structure itself embodied the aspirations defining America’s enduring purpose.  He called particular attention to the dome above the main reading room decorated with a dozen “monumental figures” representing the advance of civilization and culminating in a figure representing America itself.  Contemplating the imagery, Brooks rhapsodized:

“The theory of history depicted in this mural gave America impressive historical roots, a spiritual connection to the centuries. And it assigned a specific historic role to America as the latest successor to Jerusalem, Athens, and Rome. In the procession of civilization, certain nations rise up to make extraordinary contributions… At the dawn of the 20th century, America was to take its turn at global supremacy.  It was America’s task to take the grandeur of past civilizations, modernize it, and democratize it.  This common destiny would unify diverse Americans and give them a great national purpose.”

This February, 20 years later, in a column with an identical title, but this time appearing in the pages of his present employer, the New York Times, Brooks revisited this theme.  Again, he began with a paean to the Library of Congress and its spectacular dome with its series of “monumental figures” that placed America “at the vanguard of the great human march of progress.”  For Brooks, those 12 allegorical figures convey a profound truth.

“America is the grateful inheritor of other people’s gifts.  It has a spiritual connection to all people in all places, but also an exceptional role.  America culminates history.  It advances a way of life and a democratic model that will provide people everywhere with dignity.  The things Americans do are not for themselves only, but for all mankind.”

In 1997, in the midst of the Clinton presidency, Brooks had written that “America’s mission was to advance civilization itself.”  In 2017, as Donald Trump gained entry into the Oval Office, he embellished and expanded that mission, describing a nation “assigned by providence to spread democracy and prosperity; to welcome the stranger; to be brother and sister to the whole human race.” 

Back in 1997, “a moment of world supremacy unlike any other,” Brooks had worried that his countrymen might not seize the opportunity that was presenting itself.  On the cusp of the twenty-first century, he worried that Americans had “discarded their pursuit of national greatness in just about every particular.”  The times called for a leader like Theodore Roosevelt, who wielded that classic “big stick” and undertook monster projects like the Panama Canal.  Yet Americans were stuck instead with Bill Clinton, a small-bore triangulator.  “We no longer look at history as a succession of golden ages,” Brooks lamented.  “And, save in the speeches of politicians who usually have no clue what they are talking about,” America was no longer fulfilling its “special role as the vanguard of civilization.”

By early 2017, with Donald Trump in the White House and Steve Bannon whispering in his ear, matters had become worse still.  Americans had seemingly abandoned their calling outright.  “The Trump and Bannon Anschluss has exposed the hollowness of our patriotism,” wrote Brooks, inserting the now-obligatory reference to Nazi Germany.  The November 2016 presidential election had “exposed how attenuated our vision of national greatness has become and how easy it was for Trump and Bannon to replace a youthful vision of American greatness with a reactionary, alien one.”  That vision now threatens to leave America as “just another nation, hunkered down in a fearful world.”

What exactly happened between 1997 and 2017, you might ask?  What occurred during that “moment of world supremacy” to reduce the United States from a nation summoned to redeem humankind to one hunkered down in fear?

Trust Brooks to have at hand a brow-furrowing explanation.  The fault, he explains, lies with an “educational system that doesn’t teach civilizational history or real American history but instead a shapeless multiculturalism,” as well as with “an intellectual culture that can’t imagine providence.”  Brooks blames “people on the left who are uncomfortable with patriotism and people on the right who are uncomfortable with the federal government that is necessary to lead our project.” 

An America that no longer believes in itself ― that’s the problem. In effect, Brooks revises Norma Desmond’s famous complaint about the movies, now repurposed to diagnose an ailing nation: it’s the politics that got small.

Nowhere does he consider the possibility that his formula for “national greatness” just might be so much hooey. Between 1997 and 2017, after all, egged on by people like David Brooks, Americans took a stab at “greatness,” with the execrable Donald Trump now numbering among the eventual results.

His very presence affirming the ideological balance that, until November 8th of last year, was a prized hallmark of “respectable” journalism. Just as that balance always involved considerable posturing, so, too, with the ostensible conservatism of David Brooks: it’s an act.

Invading Greatness

Say what you will about the shortcomings of the American educational system and the country’s intellectual culture, they had far less to do with creating Trump than did popular revulsion prompted by specific policies that Brooks, among others, enthusiastically promoted. Not that he is inclined to tally up the consequences. Only as a sort of postscript to his litany of contemporary American ailments does he refer even in passing to what he calls the “humiliations of Iraq.”

A great phrase, that. Yet much like, say, the “tragedy of Vietnam” or the “crisis of Watergate,” it conceals more than it reveals.  Here, in short, is a succinct historical reference that cries out for further explanation. It bursts at the seams with implications demanding to be unpacked, weighed, and scrutinized.  Brooks shrugs off Iraq as a minor embarrassment, the equivalent of having shown up at a dinner party wearing the wrong clothes.

Under the circumstances, it’s easy to forget that, back in 2003, he and other members of the Church of America the Redeemer devoutly supported the invasion of Iraq.  They welcomed war.  They urged it. They did so not because Saddam Hussein was uniquely evil ― although he was evil enough ― but because they saw in such a war the means for the United States to accomplish its salvific mission.  Toppling Saddam and transforming Iraq would provide the mechanism for affirming and renewing America’s “national greatness.”

Anyone daring to disagree with that proposition they denounced as craven or cowardly.  Writing at the time, Brooks disparaged those opposing the war as mere “marchers.” They were effete, pretentious, ineffective, and absurd.  “These people are always in the streets with their banners and puppets.  They march against the IMF and World Bank one day, and against whatever war happens to be going on the next… They just march against.”

Perhaps space constraints did not permit Brooks in his recent column to spell out the “humiliations” that resulted and that even today continue to accumulate.  Here in any event is a brief inventory of what that euphemism conceals: thousands of Americans needlessly killed; tens of thousands grievously wounded in body or spirit; trillions of dollars wasted; millions of Iraqis dead, injured, or displaced; this nation’s moral standing compromised by its resort to torture, kidnapping, assassination, and other perversions; a region thrown into chaos and threatened by radical terrorist entities like the Islamic State that U.S. military actions helped foster.  And now, if only as an oblique second-order bonus, we have Donald Trump’s elevation to the presidency to boot.

In refusing to reckon with the results of the war he once so ardently endorsed, Brooks is hardly alone.  Members of the Church of America the Redeemer, Democrats and Republicans alike, are demonstrably incapable of rendering an honest accounting of what their missionary efforts have yielded.

Brooks belongs, or once did, to the Church’s neoconservative branch. But liberals such as Bill Clinton, along with his secretary of state Madeleine Albright, were congregants in good standing, as were Barack Obama and his secretary of state Hillary Clinton.  So, too, are putative conservatives like Senators John McCain, Ted Cruz, and Marco Rubio, all of them subscribing to the belief in the singularity and indispensability of the United States as the chief engine of history, now and forever.

Back in April 2003, confident that the fall of Baghdad had ended the Iraq War, Brooks predicted that “no day will come when the enemies of this endeavor turn around and say, ‘We were wrong. Bush was right.’” Rather than admitting error, he continued, the war’s opponents “will just extend their forebodings into a more distant future.”

Yet it is the war’s proponents who, in the intervening years, have choked on admitting that they were wrong. Or when making such an admission, as did both John Kerry and Hillary Clinton while running for president, they write it off as an aberration, a momentary lapse in judgment of no particular significance, like having guessed wrong on a TV quiz show. 

Rather than requiring acts of contrition, the Church of America the Redeemer has long promulgated a doctrine of self-forgiveness, freely available to all adherents all the time. “You think our country’s so innocent?” the nation’s 45th president recently barked at a TV host who had the temerity to ask how he could have kind words for the likes of Russian President Vladimir Putin. Observers professed shock that a sitting president would openly question American innocence.

In fact, Trump’s response and the kerfuffle that ensued both missed the point. No serious person believes that the United States is “innocent.” Worshipers in the Church of America the Redeemer do firmly believe, however, that America’s transgressions, unlike those of other countries, don’t count against it. Once committed, such sins are simply to be set aside and then expunged, a process that allows American politicians and pundits to condemn a “killer” like Putin with a perfectly clear conscience while demanding that Donald Trump do the same.

What the Russian president has done in Crimea, Ukraine, and Syria qualifies as criminal. What American presidents have done in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Libya qualifies as incidental and, above all, besides the point.

Rather than confronting the havoc and bloodshed to which the United States has contributed, those who worship in the Church of America the Redeemer keep their eyes fixed on the far horizon and the work still to be done in aligning the world with American expectations. At least they would, were it not for the arrival at center stage of a manifestly false prophet who, in promising to “make America great again,” inverts all that “national greatness” is meant to signify.

For Brooks and his fellow believers, the call to “greatness” emanates from faraway precincts ― in the Middle East, East Asia, and Eastern Europe.  For Trump, the key to “greatness” lies in keeping faraway places and the people who live there as far away as possible. Brooks et al. see a world that needs saving and believe that it’s America’s calling to do just that.  In Trump’s view, saving others is not a peculiarly American responsibility. Events beyond our borders matter only to the extent that they affect America’s well-being. Trump worships in the Church of America First, or at least pretends to do so in order to impress his followers.

That Donald Trump inhabits a universe of his own devising, constructed of carefully arranged alt-facts, is no doubt the case. Yet, in truth, much the same can be said of David Brooks and others sharing his view of a country providentially charged to serve as the “successor to Jerusalem, Athens, and Rome.” In fact, this conception of America’s purpose expresses not the intent of providence, which is inherently ambiguous, but their own arrogance and conceit. Out of that conceit comes much mischief. And in the wake of mischief come charlatans like Donald Trump. 

Andrew J. Bacevich, a TomDispatch regular, is the author of America’s War for the Greater Middle East:  A Military History, now out in paperback.

Follow TomDispatch on Twitter and join us on Facebook. Check out the newest Dispatch Book, John Feffer’s dystopian novel Splinterlands, as well as Nick Turse’s Next Time They’ll Come to Count the Dead, and Tom Engelhardt’s latest book, Shadow Government: Surveillance, Secret Wars, and a Global Security State in a Single-Superpower World.

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Listen To This Woman's Emotional Testimony In Support Of Planned Parenthood

At a town hall meeting in Fairview, Tn. on Tuesday, one woman gave an emotional plea to her Congresswoman about why Planned Parenthood is an essential health care institution.

“Planned Parenthood saved my life,” the woman said through tears, to Republican Rep. Marsha Blackburn, whose town hall meeting was filled with constituents opposed to Blackburn’s support of phasing out the ACA, among other contentious topics, like her support for education secretary Betsy DeVos. 

The young woman continued: 

I was a college student, I was a sophomore, I was uninsured, my parents were undocumented, I worked tirelessly to pay for my college tuition and I couldn’t go anywhere else.

Community health centers kept turning me away, the health department kept turning me away…I needed my first pap smear at the age of 21. And I went in, and Planned Parenthood was compassionate, they were nonjudgmental, and they were there for me.

I had no money in my pocket and they told me I could have a pap smear for free. A week later…it came back abnormal. I had to get a colposcopy right away.

Rep. Blackburn has historically supported a staunchly anti-abortion policy agenda. In her tenure as a Congresswoman in Fairview, she has contributed to the demonization of abortion providers by leading the House Select Investigative Panel on Infant Lives, which, after the release of the Center for Medical Progress’s heavily-edited videos meant to target Planned Parenthood, needlessly investigated more than 30 organizations for potential misuse of fetal tissue from abortions only to find no evidence of wrongdoing. She has also worked tirelessly to ban abortion procedures after 20 weeks of pregnancy. 

The young woman at Blackburn’s town hall, who became a community organizer for Planned Parenthood after her first visit to the health care center, said that she understands that many legislators want to defund abortion clinics ― but also reminded Rep. Blackburn that only three percent of Planned Parenthood’s services are abortion procedures.

“What do you have to say to the 2.5 million people who go to Planned Parenthood every year?” she asked, after pointing out that millions utilize Planned Parenthood’s services for STI tests, cancer screenings, vaccines, and more.

Rep. Blackburn thanked the woman for sharing her story, but defended her opinion. “I stand firmly by my belief that taxpayer funds ought not to be used for abortions,” she said. 

But, as members of the town hall crowd were quick to point out, that argument is moot: Because of the Hyde Amendment, no federal funding goes to abortion procedures unless they are done to save the mother’s life. 

h/t Cosmopolitan

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Schools Stand Up For Trans Students As GOP Withdraws Protections

Multiple schools around the country were quick to stand up against President Donald Trump’s decision to rescind protections of transgender students, announcing plans to maintain their policies regardless of the White House’s stance.

The Trump administration announced Wednesday that it would roll back protections of transgender students that President Barack Obama’s administration had put in place, lifting bathroom guidelines that said schools receiving federal funds must treat a student’s gender identity as his or her sex.

Several education officials around the country responded to Trump’s announcement by saying they would continue to protect transgender students in their schools. 

“Transgender students in L.A. Unified will remain protected regardless of the new directive by the Trump administration pertaining to access to restrooms and locker rooms,” Los Angeles Unified School District Superintendent Michelle King said in a statement. “The District embraces all students and remains committed to affirming a safe, productive learning environment for everyone.”

Philadelphia School District Superintendent William Hite echoed the sentiment in a statement to CBS News.

“This announcement will not change any school district policy or city law that protects our students,” Hite said.

Chris Reykdal, state superintendent in Washington, said the protections would remain in place in the state. In a series of tweets, his office said the federal government hadn’t hurt “transgender students’ longstanding rights in WA.” 

Illinois education officials also said they would maintain their policies to ensure protections for transgender students.

“[Chicago Public Schools] led the way among school districts on bathroom policies for transgender students and staff, and we have no intention of backing down no matter what President Trump does to discriminate against the LGBTQ community,” spokeswoman Emily Bittner told the Chicago Tribune.

Although nothing can stop a college from maintaining or implementing the Obama administration’s guidelines, the Trump administration has made “a much more ambiguous situation going forward,” said Genny Beemyn, director of the Stonewall Center at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst.

Portland State University in Oregon will be among the schools that don’t change their policies, school spokesman Chris Broderick told Willamette Week. He said PSU prides itself on offering extensive services to LGBTQ students and being ranked as one of the most LGBTQ-friendly colleges in the country.

“We’re certainly not going to be affected,” Broderick told the publication. “There’s just not an issue at all on who can use what bathroom and that’s not going to change at PSU.” 

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Brilliant Dentist Has 'Where's Waldo?' Scene On His Ceiling For Patients

A dentist in the U.K. has a brilliant way to keep patients calm and entertained while reclining in the dental chair.

Reddit user Michael Mannion shared a photo he took at a mydentist office in Rugeley, Staffordshire in England.

As the photo shows, part of the ceiling over the chair where patients sit is covered with a scene from the Where’s Waldo? series (or Where’s Wally? as they call it across the pond). Waldo fans on Reddit identified it as a portion of the “Fairground” scene. 

Mannion told The Huffington Post he was a big fan of the decor. 

“The poster was probably put up for children specifically, but I know it would calm me down and distract me no matter what age I was,” Mannion said. “They only have one room for examinations, so all patients will see it.”

He was also delighted to find how many people on Reddit enjoyed the set-up. “I didn’t expect much from it but the discussion is great, especially learning about what Where’s Wally? is called in different countries.”

After the photo received so much attention, maybe other dentists will follow the Where’s Waldo? model.

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Kristen Bell And Dax Shepard Are Just A Typical Married Couple Arguing Over A La-Z-Boy

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Following the uproar surrounding West Elm’s Peggy sofa, Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard have found themselves at odds over their own piece of furniture: a La-Z-Boy recliner. 

On Tuesday, Shepard posted a photo of himself reclining in the leather chair, along with a caption explaining his argument. 

“My wife, in an attempt to discredit my character, will be posting a similar picture, but with the expressed intention of attacking my sense of style in home furnishings,” he wrote. “The proof of this Lazyboy’s aesthetic appeal is written all over my face. #getcomfy #functionbeforefashion” 

The following day, Bell did, in fact, post a response to provide her side of the story. 

“This is not a bit. @daxshepard has sincerely suggested the new home for the lazy boy from his office be in the center of my living room,” she wrote. “He made an adorable argument about how epic his TV viewing experience will be if I let him keep it there. The man has lost his mind. #chiphappens” 

As many couples know, trying to decide on decor for your home is never easy. (This writer speaks from experience.) This is why we love Bell and Shepard ― they’re just a typical couple that sometimes argues over silly things. (Stars! They’re just like us!)

There is one thing we want to know though: Who won? 

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Christopher Kane Sent Models Down The Runway In Furry Crocs

Just like the word “fetch,” furry Crocs just aren’t going to happen. But Christopher Kane is trying oh-so-hard to make people think they’re fashionable. 

The 34-year-old fashion designer recently sent models down the runway at his London Fashion Week presentation in fur-lined Crocs, instantly drawing the ire of the internet. 

Last year, Kane pulled a similar stunt, putting bejewled Crocs on his models. We’re not sure if this year’s look is better or worse: 

Though it’s not quite clear who the audience is for this sort of shoe, Katy Perry attended Kane’s show. Maybe she’ll try out the look for an upcoming performance? 

But if you’re keen on wearing the trend before Perry or Kane make it the next “thing,” shop your favorite furry look on the Crocs website now: 

The HuffPost Lifestyle newsletter will make you happier and healthier, one email at a time. Sign up here.

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Kellyanne Conway Wants You To Know Donald Trump Is A Fabulous Boss For Women

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NATIONAL HARBOR, Md. ― If you were hoping to hear more from Kellyanne Conway about the inner workings of the White House, what policies President Donald Trump might be pursuing or even whether things are running smoothly in the administration, you would have been sorely disappointed Thursday morning. 

Conway, a top aide to the president, took the stage at the Conservative Political Action Conference and talked instead about how wonderful Trump is ― especially when it comes to his treatment of women. 

“Donald Trump is someone who is not fully understood for how compassionate and what a great boss he is to women,” Conway told the conservative crowd Thursday. 

Conway has largely been sidelined from doing many media appearances after she went on MSNBC and said the president had full confidence in Michael Flynn ― shortly before Trump fired Flynn as national security adviser. So instead, she appeared at CPAC and touted what a good man Trump is and how pro-women the White House is. 

“I decided ultimately that I work for a man in the White House where that work-life balance is welcome,” Conway said.

“I’m not about calling myself a feminist,” she added. “For me, it’s difficult to call myself a feminist in the classic sense because it seems to be very anti-male, and it certainly is very pro-abortion in this context. And I’m not anti-male or pro-abortion.”

Conway also tried to give a glimpse of what Trump is like in private, assuring attendees that he’s the same man all the time.

“Most of the strength and the leadership skills and the decisiveness, the resoluteness that I think the [public] is craving from its president, from its leader, is the same in public as it is in private,” she said. “I find him to be very kind and generous. I find he has a great sense of humor. He’s genuinely interested in everybody’s lives. … He’s a man who just absorbs information and experiences.”

Trump is also the man who insisted during the campaign that when he once bragged about using his celebrity status to sexually assault women, he was just engaging in “locker-room banter” ― acting different from how he acts publicly, in other words. 

“He’s a family man. He is happiest when he is with his family,” Conway insisted Thursday morning. 

Conway also encouraged women to shoot for the stars, including considering running for president. During the campaign, Trump insulted the looks of Carly Fiorina, who ran against him in the GOP primary. He also mocked Hillary Clinton for sounding like she was “shouting,” said she didn’t look “presidential,” and claimed that the only reason she was a contender was because she had played the “woman’s card.”

“The job for first female president of the United States remains open,” Conway said, “so go for it.”

Want more updates from Amanda Terkel? Sign up for her newsletter, Piping Hot Truth, here.

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Cheryl Cole Officially Announces Pregnancy With Liam Payne

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It’s official: Cheryl Cole and Liam Payne are expecting a baby.

The 33-year-old former “Girls Aloud” singer revealed her baby bump in a photo shoot for L’Oréal Paris and The Prince’s Trust, published on the cover of Thursday’s Daily Mirror. 

This will be the first child for both Cole and her One Direction beau.

Speculation about Cole’s pregnancy has circulated since September 2016, when Cole was spotted with a tiny bump. People confirmed Cole’s pregnancy with Payne in November of 2016, but the couple has kept mum on the subject until now.

Cole and Payne first met back in 2008, when the latter auditioned for the U.K. version of “The X Factor.” Cole served as a judge on the show. Though Payne did not make the cut in 2008, he auditioned again in 2010 and was placed in the boy band One Direction. And the rest, as they say, is history. 

Cole and Payne reconnected in late 2015 and began dating officially in 2016. Cole has been married twice before ― first to soccer player Ashley Cole from 2006 to 2010, and then to Jean-Bernard Fernandez-Versini in 2014. Her divorce from Fernandez-Versini was finalized in October of last year.

If you’re wondering how Payne feels about the news, look no further than his Twitter bio: The 23-year-old singer has declared himself “the luckiest man in the world.”

Congratulations to the happy couple!

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Jennifer Lopez Wrote The Sweetest Birthday Message For Her Twins

Jennifer Lopez has a lot to celebrate this week. It’s officially been nine years since she became a mother.

On Wednesday, she celebrated her twin son and daughter’s birthday and showered Emme and Maximilian with love.

The famous mom posted a collage of photos of herself with her children over the years on Instagram. In the caption she shared a beautiful birthday message.

“I cant believe its 9 years ago today that God entrusted me with the biggest blessings of my life… he finally sent me my beautiful twins, my babies, my love and life in two lil human beings,” she wrote. “I immediately felt bonded, protective, overwhelmed with emotion and like the luckiest woman on this earth. And Ive felt that way everyday since.”

Lopez added that her children always make her proud to be their mother.

“You are two shining lights that make this world a better more beautiful place for me and everyone who is lucky enough to know you,” she said. “Thank you Lord for choosing me to be Max and Emme’s mom. The word LOVE is not enough for how my heart and soul feel when I think of you… Happy Happy Birthday my lil coconuts!!! Mama loves you so damn much!!!”

Oooohhh yeaaaahhhh… #coconutsandwich #mybabies #LOVE

A post shared by Jennifer Lopez (@jlo) on Jan 21, 2017 at 5:34pm PST

J.Lo welcomed Emme and Max with her then-husband Marc Anthony in 2008. Over the years, she’s shared glimpses into her “coconuts’” lives as they grow up.

Needless to say, it’s clear these kids are so very loved.

Happy birthday Emme and Max!

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Woman's Raw Illustrations Show The Reality Of Battling An Eating Disorder

Warning: Some of the below images may be considered upsetting or triggering to those who have struggled with disordered eating.

After four years of battling eating disorders, Christie Begnell found healing in art. The results are honest and striking illustrations, which have been compiled together in a book, Me and My ED. Each image represents the harsh reality of living with anorexia and OSFED (Other Specified Feeding or Eating Disorder).

“When I draw I am at my calmest and I am able to think things through with a clear and focused mind,” the 24-year-old from Sydney, Australia, told The Huffington Post. “Drawing is my mental health. I contribute a lot of the progress I have made in recovery to my art.”

Begnell’s journey towards self-clarity has been a long and winding one.

When Begnell turned 20, her life began to slowly unravel. She had just gotten out of a long-term relationship, and her anxiety and depression, which she told HuffPost she had always knew she had but didn’t address, began to worsen. 

She started having urges to self-harm and was beginning to gain weight. She decided to attempt to regain some control over her life by dieting.

“I found it a great distraction from everything that was happening in my life,” Begnell said. “In a world where I felt like I was spinning out of control, I gained control in the numbers and my weight.”

Her behavior soon became obsessive, and It spiraled into anorexia.

Once it was clear to Begnell that she had a problem, she began to see a therapist and started a journal in order to write down her thoughts.

Then, in May of 2016, Begnell’s condition began to worsen and she decided she needed more intensive help. She tried to admit herself to a public hospital for an eating disorder, but was rejected because the hospital staff deemed her BMI “too healthy.”

So, she admitted herself as someone with chronic suicidal thoughts in order to get help, but did not have a positive experience.

“What I needed at that time was a hospital admission where I could be kept safe and have the support to work on my eating disorder recovery,” she said. “What I received was a lot of dismissal from nursing and medical staff, stating that I was basically not sick enough to warrant help for my eating disorder.”

Frustrated, Begnell began to journal her feelings more often, and soon the writing transformed into drawings as a means to communicate what she was struggling with.

“I used it as a way to separate my healthy self from my disordered self and that was so very important,” Begnell told HuffPost. 

This impulse to separate herself from her issues sparked the creation of “Ana.” Short for “Anorexia,” Ana is a character in many of Begnell’s drawings, and that character represents her eating disorder.

“Personifying an eating disorder is something that is quite common with the illness,” Begnell said, explaining that many refer to bulimia as “Mia” and eating disorders as “Ed.”

Begnell said she felt that Ana was in her head, speaking to her.

“Ana would promise me things that I needed at the time, if I followed her rules,” she explained. “For example, I would be loved and cared for if I lost a certain amount of kilos. As my illness went on and I became more and more unwell, I became very enmeshed with Ana and I lost a lot of my values.” 

Soon after Begnell began drawing these types of images, her mother found her private clinic that specialized in eating disorders and admitted her daughter in August of 2016.

It was here that Begnell finally began to recover.

She also kept drawing.

Some of her nurses and therapists noticed her illustrations and encouraged her to share them in group sessions. She began to do so, and soon realized that other women related to them.

A therapist suggested she gather all her illustrations and publish them in a book. Begnell took that advice.

Begnell is now in recovery, but she said she still feels Ana’s presence.

“I’m the best I’ve been in years,” Begnell told HuffPost. “I still have days where Ana is loud, but I’m lucky to have a great support network around me who can recognize Ana’s voice and help me challenge her.”

She said she even trolls Ana sometimes.

“I post a lot of photos exposing my belly rolls and back fat now simply because Ana doesn’t want me to,” she said.

It’s acts of self-expression like posting those photos and creating her drawings which have truly helped Begnell recover.

“Expression is going to look different for everyone, but the key is to not let what is happening in your head stay in there,” she said. “The more we talk about our problems and seek help and advice, the more that stigma of eating disorders is broken down.”

If you’re struggling with an eating disorder, call the National Eating Disorder Association hotline at 1-800-931-2237.

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