Evangelical Sect Bans USB as a Tech for Satan Worshipers
Posted in: Miscellaneous Tech, Today's Chili, usbFor millennia, the greatest theological minds have vehemently debated one the great questions of existence: what kind of connector does Satan use to link his peripherals and his P.C.? Well, we now have a definitive answer: that dastardly trident-branded USB.
At least that’s what one Brazilian “evangelical cult” claims. Welder Saldanha, the founder and “apostle” of “Paz do Senhor Amado” (Peace Beloved of the Lord) has forbidden followers from using the connector which is branded with Satan’s soul-poking tool of choice, citing that “The symbol of that name [USB] is a trident, which is used to torture
the souls that go to hell. Use of that symbol proves that all users of
this technology are actually worshipers of Satan.”
Brazilian blogs have been bouncing this story around since at least early summer (link with Google translation). But only now are we snarky secularists of Europe and North America starting to take notice.
There are some elements of this story that seem too wacked to be true, such as when asked which peripheral-connector followers are permissible, Mr. Saldanha answers Bluetooth because “Blue was the color of the eyes of our savior Jesus Christ.” I haven’t been able to find any independent verification that this “cult” even exists. So, there is a chance I may be putting up a post in the near future explaining that this is all a prank or a joke that did not properly bridge the Portuguese-English divide.
But for now, it’s all pretty nutso.
pic via
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