Hasta La Gadget!

Mar 26

Hipsters Grieve: The $150 Walmart Fixie

Posted in: Today's Chili, Transportation

walmart fixed

Yesterday, a lot of commenters on the post about American “Dutch” city bikes thought that a $650 bicycle couldn’t be called cheap. This post is for you. Behold, the Men’s Mongoose Cachet Fixed-Speed Bike, a $150 “fixie” from Walmart. All you hipsters can cry into your PBR right now.

Let’s begin with the name. First, it is from Mongoose. Back in the BMX years of the 1980s, Mongoose was a quality brand. Now a quick Google shows that Mongoose equals cheap, department store tat. Better is the model name: Cachet. The irony is, of course, that naming anything Cachet immediately robs it of that same quality.

But the best part of the name is left to the end: fixed-speed. What could this mean? Does it run at just one speed? If so, what is that speed? Fast? More likely it is left-in-the-basement-zero-mph. We assume that it should read “fixed-gear”, but a look at the specs doesn’t help: the list says “single-speed”. This bike is more likely a freewheel, although it does have toe-clips and straps.

The specs themselves are neither shaming nor exciting. The frame is aluminum, which should make this bike lighter than many home-grown steel fixed-gears (although the shipping weight is a back-breaking 40-pounds. That must be a heavy cardboard box). It has two “calipur” brakes, and “high-profile colored rims” which “add urban style.”

We guess this bike could be okay. After all, the fixed-gear bike is so simple and so free of components that it should be cheap and good. Plus, as long as you put it together properly, there is almost nothing to go wrong. On the other hand, every cheap bike I have bought has fallen apart quickly. One thing is for sure: the days of the fixed-gear as hipster accessory are over. Thank God.

700C Men’s Mongoose Cachet Fixed-Speed Bike [Walmart via the Twitter]

See Also: